well im 25 yrs old and still a virgin, i had a bad experience with someone in my teens and it has more or less riuned my life ( i wasnt raped tough)!! im a pretty good lookin girl i never have an actual problem attracing men and have been and played a little with with many fellas but when thing start to get intamate i just freak out . i am also a bot shy bout my body coz im neither fat nor skinny..now i am panaicing coz ill end up on my own like really what man is going to like a girl like me or even have de patience for me!!
2006-11-29 22:53:55 · 12 answers · asked by simply B 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You would benefit from a few one on one sessions with a good therapist.
Not dealing with what happened to you previously is the root of your problem.
2006-11-29 23:17:57 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry to hear this. :-( This is hard to go through. Makes my heart sad.
I have know several ladies like this. I know of many of them have gotten healing in their lives and married some great men of God. From a Christian standpoint, God can "redeem" this area of your life.
If I can be bold and to challenge you - look for healing in your life in this area before you continue in any relationship? Should you a relationship wtih someone and have this dealt issue and can hinder your relationship with them.
One of the first steps is that you need to forgive the person that did this to you. it is very painful, however, holding on to that grudge, stops you from moving forward. The next step would be to ask God for help in forgiving yourself. Deep down you may have so negative thoughts about yourself.
Another suggestion is to find a women's support group. Some of the local churches have ministries to help. You will need to be careful in looking for a group. I know there are some great Christian literate out there on this topic...can't think of them.
2006-12-01 07:08:57 · answer #2 · answered by today 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once you fine the right guy, it will all fall into place. If you can tell him about your bad experience, he will be more caring and take things slowly with you. Don't rush these things, I have friends older than you in the same circumstances and your never to late to find someone.
Just now, go out enjoy yourself, when the right one comes along, you will know. You will feel comfortable with him which will allow you to relax.
2006-11-29 22:58:05 · answer #3 · answered by Scottish Girl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok sweetie first you need to find a group or a therapist and work out these issues. don't try to do it alone. there's nothing wrong with being a virgin, believe me straight men are just happy to see the boobies, as long as you've got a handful they'll be happy. lololol, acknowledgeing you have a problem is a huge step, if you can't afford a therapist there are abuse survivor self-help groups etc etc etc. hang in there darlin' it'll be ok.
2006-11-29 23:01:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mother use to tell me when i was younger.. there is someone for everyone in the world, and i beleive that!
your 25 your still young, i think you need to take things slowly with men. Men arent as pig headed as some women say they are, all you need to do is find someone who is willing to take his time.. have you tryed internet dating? great way to get to know people.. but also make sure you stay safe!
2006-11-29 23:33:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of us have bad experiences now and again,but eventually you
find the right person. I was 30 before it happened and I haven't looked back. married now with three kids. Take your time and enjoy.
2006-12-02 10:18:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should seek counselling for the incident that happened when you was a teen and maybe that will assist you in your relationships. Good luck sweetheart!!!!
2006-11-29 22:58:14 · answer #7 · answered by lisa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need a therapist as much as i do .....but then again i have no problem being intimate i just have a problem getting into a relationship
hmmmm tough s***
oooo yea and im very self-conscious about myself just like u
2006-11-30 00:33:37 · answer #8 · answered by sexyashell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
erm, maybe its time. if you meet a guy you like or girl. then explain and ask for patience then when you feel comfortable you can try the naughty
2006-11-29 22:57:43 · answer #9 · answered by blakorkid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please get some counseling! Some things you can't get past by yourself and everyone needs help sometimes. And no one can love you until you first love yourself. I know that sounds dumb, but it's true! So you're not perfect-- honey, who is? You have your whole life ahead of you. Please don't waste another moment in putting yourself down!
2006-11-29 23:04:28 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋