I'm 20 years old, and have been with a guy for 6 years. He's a couple years older than me and it's been a long distance relationship for 3 years. I've dated other people during this time, including 3 month long relationships, however I've never given a cr*p about them at all.
He's the only person I've ever loved, and he's the only person I care about. What's wrong with me then? I do know he goes out with female "friends' and had one sitting on his lap when we broke up temporarily once....but it doesn't really bother me because I feel like our love and bond--friendship mostly--outlasts anything. We know each other best, and his plan is when I graduate in a year, he wants me to marry him. (Although I want to go to graduate school...)
What is this relationship? I am kind of a cold person in that I have only loved two people in my entire life: him and my mother. I have a hard time loving people or caring in general...so what's up with it all?
2006-11-29 18:01:08 · 7 answers · asked by Curious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
The most physical thing I've done with others is making out while naked...but I didn't want to so soon stopped. I also dislike physical contact in general, but I know that I love this guy the most out of anyone in my life. Before him, I never though I could care about anyone....ever. I had no idea what "care" or "love" was.
2006-11-29 18:04:09 · update #1
Poster 1: I don't know about htat. I'd say loving yourself contradicts loving others, as it posits selfishness against selflessness.
2006-11-29 18:05:36 · update #2
I admit I'm a cheater..but so what? I could give less of a f*ck about everyone else in my life except my mother and him...seriously too. I don't give a cr*p about people because I just don't.
2006-11-29 18:06:24 · update #3
He was 16 years old when we started dating...
2006-11-29 18:06:52 · update #4
Well when he had someone on his lap you say you two were split so whats that have to do with anything, you were broke up. Your dating others behind his back while staying in a relationship with him, this makes you a cheater no matter how to try to cut it.
-NmD!
2006-11-29 18:04:59 · answer #1 · answered by NoMaD! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very interesting question. I can tell that your heart is torn between both of these people that you obviously have strong feelings for. I have tried to be in a relationship with two people at once in the past (I had a fiance living up north and had a relationship with someone else in the south where i went to college). I found, however, that after a while (after the initial infatuation phase) with the new individual it will become clear which person you desire the most. Whoever starts giving you the "tummy tickles" (be it the ex or the new person) is the one you need to go after. In my opinion it is perfectly cool to love both of them at the same time (believe me there are FAR worse crimes than tossing out a little extra love) until it becomes apparent which one captures your heart. If you play the "game" the way society (and your current love) expects you to by breaking up with one person before going after another you very well might find yourself a lonely and unhappy old man. I've become emotionally callous to so called "cheating" a long time ago and have a clear understanding now that you need to basically go by the rule that "everything is fair in love and war" and find your true love. If I had not acted as stated above, I would not be happily married with a new baby (a miracle in my eyes) now. I hope you trust I am a good person because I speak from my heart. It is time for you my friend to listen to your heart right now. Do whatever you need to do to give both people a chance at capturing your heart. It is a noble cause and worth any guilt you may encounter during the process. Your heart and your soul will thank you for the sacrifice. True happiness awaits, but like all good things it comes with a price. Pay it in full and the guiding light of love will lead your heart to it's rightful owner.
2006-12-03 01:48:21 · answer #2 · answered by Bumbo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm.. interesting.
I think he's just simply one of those people that you'll never forget in your lifetime. I think however, that you both have a really strong bond with each other, but the lonliness gets to you both beacuse of your distance apart.
I think that once both of you start living in a closer proximity then it won't be so bad. But for now, just worry about yourself. If he truly loves you then he'll wait patiently for you, vice versa. But since you're both far a part I don't think you should worry so much about the relationship but on yourself. That's the important part. If the love and bond is as strong as you percieve it to be, then just be happy that you have something that most people dont.
2006-11-29 18:33:22 · answer #3 · answered by Chant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just from reading it, your relationship sounds like a "backup." A backup to if neither of you find someone, you end up with each other. If it's friendship, then just be friends. And as far as he's the only person you've ever cared about, etc.. maybe you're not giving the other guys who've entered your life a chance.
2006-11-29 18:05:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes your ability to love others is based on the ability to love yourself.
2006-11-29 18:04:36 · answer #5 · answered by motogirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
aren't u an early berry. isn't your bf a child molester if he started with u when u were 14?
2006-11-29 18:05:49 · answer #6 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and in the end....the love you take...is equal to the love you make.
2006-11-29 18:08:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋