How can I make anal intercourse less painful and nasty?

Question

Im a female and I tried anal three times...twice it hurt really bad right when they put it in, the third time it felt really really uncomfortable. I just do fingering right now, but it still feels nasty like bowel movement...are there any tips to not make it hurt? Numbing sprays..lol but seriously

i didnt ask this question to be turned away or judged. Ok, so if u wanna judge and criticize then please dont answer the question..if I want to experiment, then I will. I just want tips on how to make it a more enjoyable experiment. thank you.

Answer 1

How about not do it? It's a one way street you sodomite!

Answer 2

Lubrication and enough time. Tell him to go to easy, even take it in steps. First just slip the head inside (not the full length). Use fingers, some smaller sex toys, work up to the bigger tool. I am very big and my wife is VERY petite. It took me a year to build up to it and the first half dozen or so time, it hurt her. But after a while, she became looser and now there is not much pain. The anus will gradually loosen (just like the vagina does) and the pain will decrease. That's why porn stars don't feel pain. They've done it so much that their bodies have adjusted to the fit. Long enough time goes by and enough anal sex, even the anus can become loose and not have the same pleasure (or tightness) it once did. That's why it's good for a once in a while pleasure. But do it every day with a guy that's hung like a horse, and you will become loose after enough time goes by. The worse extreme is a prolapsed rectum (for crazy people that do fisting and huge toys and other objects).

Answer 3

To reduce pain/discomfort as much as possible, here's my plan:

A few months before the magic moment, you should try to start stretching yourself. You can do this several ways- the 'home' method, or the 'professional' method. The home version just consists of going slow; every day, spend a half hour or so either having your partner or yourself inserting fingers. Start with one; a week later, try two, and so on, and so on. The professional method includes buying a variety of dildos and butt-plugs in various sizes, going from small to approximately the size of what you eventually plan to take, and use them in increments, just like the fingers. Remember, always space it out between a week or so- no fast rushing. Let your body adjust to it. If you are seriously dedicated to enjoying anal sex and want to get there, you can purchase a flexible (emphasis here on flexible) buttplug that comes with ties that can be fastened around your hips/thighs, keeping it in place. You can then discreetly wear it all throughout the day without anyone noticing (believe me), and really fitting you perfectly- not to mention maybe giving you a little sexual buzz during the day! Continue up in size until you're able to take what you want. It might still feel like a bowel movement, but I'm betting that once you get more accustomed, either the feeling will go away, or you'll be used to it.

Now, when the big day comes, or even as a preclude to the special moments I described above, this is the routine you want to follow:

First off, you want to make sure you're completely empty- go and sit on the pot for a while beforehand and make sure you truly are empty and nothing will be lying in wait, so to speak. That's not to say that you won't get that customary 'I'm going to have a bowel movement' feeling that is often a part of anal sex, but you'll know it means nothing. After that, you can clean yourself out, either just with some soapy fingers in the shower/tub, or a full-on enema that will ensure that you are completely clean. Then you're ready to go! After that, you need lube, lube, lube, and more lube. Only- please don't use numbing sprays! They're not a good idea; you do anal sex for the pleasurable feeling, and masking that is sad. Not to mention that if anything bad happens, like an anal tear or something, you won't be able to feel it- risking sexual health and possible big injury. Use a good, thick, lube, and a lot of it, deep inside you.

Next step- a vibrating buttplug- one that doesn't have to be big at all, if you don't want. It's just pretty much necessary if you don't find yourself opening up easily or feeling uncomfortable during anal sex. Lube it up and insert it, and then turn that sucker on. While it's running, that's your time to start pleasing yourself, since anal sex is all about relaxation. Either you or your partner can do a variety of foreplay-like actions, and if you can have an orgasm or two (from clitorial stimulation) within that time, all the better! It will relax you a lot. All in all, the plug should stay in and vibrating for about fifteen minutes to shake you all loose and get you ready.

After that, it's all about how you feel. If you think you're ready, start the penetration . . . if not, your partner can continue some playing with the anus to help you. But eventually you can go- remember, to help take whatever it is, you can always 'bear down' like you're trying to have a bowel movement, which can help slide it in easier. Go slow, breathe (it helps to push it in a centimeter at a time as you breathe out), and use your fingers or have your partner use theirs to manually stimulate you- that sensation can shift your focus so you don't feel whatever's going on back there so much. And that's about all you can do, in the end.

Those are just some tips I've learned of and picked up- take and choose from them as you wish. Good luck!

Answer 4

Here is some good information for you (link below). A great book about doing this is "The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women". My wife was shy of anal sex years ago and after reading that book moved toward doing it. Like you mentioned, at first she felt like she was going to have a bowel movement, which is a normal feeling, and believe me, you don't. Nowdays she loves anal sex and it's included regularily in our sex life.

Answer 5

Try practicing with a but plug or other objects like a but plug (certain fruits and veggies for instance) that way you have control and can take it as far as you like and for as long as it does not hurt. You could start small (and still use a good lube that stays lubricated) then when you are comfortable with that size move up to a little bit bigger. You could even get your sexual partner to participate in using the but plug as part of your foreplay. If you do get used to that size and you want to move up to a bigger size then you could even start using a dildo which are usually made more like a real penis (the shape). If you practice this for quite some time and never get used to it or neve really like the way it feels then I would say that this is just not for you and move on to some other new sexual acts that you can try out!
I for one am a gay male and I like you, tried having anal sex preformed on me, but like you, I did not like the way it felt in fact what you wrote is the way I would have described it if somebody had of asked me to. Now I just tell anybody who is interested in knowing, that I am a total top (meaning that I do not take it anally). I've tried it, I know I don't like so I just don't allow it to be done to me. I have my on personal slogan about sex too and it goes like this: Sex should be pleasurable NOT painful. So there you have it. Take it for what it is worth.
AND NO, NOT ALL GAY MEN TAKE IT ANALLY!
*hugs*
JAC<

Answer 6

Yes, and numbing creams are just one of them. First of all you need to completely clean yourself, use an enema. Yes, I said enema, get them at the drug store. The keys to successful anal sex is cleanliness, patience and good lube.

You start out small, a finger is a great idea, and then work your way up, perhaps with a small b*tt p*ug or dildo. Be generous with the lube, and use a water based lube like WET. You must cover all surfaces with a barrier, such as a condom or gloves (for your fingers). Try having your partner finger you while she/he does oral sex, everything relaxes with an orgasm. However, do not ever drink or do drugs when doing anal, you need to be paying attention.

Once you get ready for a penis or dildo, then have your partner use a slow and steady in and out motion. The goal is to get the band of muscles inside the anus to relax, never ever force anything. Pain is your friend, its telling you that you are doing something wrong. However not relaxing will also cause a great deal of pain, so you need to be highly excited when you do anal.

Never ever put a penis or dildo that has been in an anus, into a vagina. Stop what you are doing, even if it ruins the mood and wash everything with warm soapy water. Reapply lube as needed, and do stop by an adult marital aid or sex shop to get a good water based lube and some butt numbing cream.

Good luck and have fun.

Answer 7

There are lubricants on the market that contain a mild numbing agent to make anal intercourse less painful. I recommend you investigate these further.

Answer 8

You need to just be relaxed... Your partner needs to also take there time.. What works for me is lube and a few drinks prior too the act.. You also can try the numbing gels or lubes.. i would suggest having your partner finger is slowly and maybe possibly buy a small thin toy and just play around with that.. once you learn to relax with it you may like it better.. but everyone is different maybe it just isn't for you...

Answer 9

the adult store carrys something called anal ease .. i think it is something to numb the area a bit.. i have never tried it i only saw it there when i went in to buy my didlo..

Answer 10

I think most have been said, the only this RELAX, breathe deep. The MOMENT you tense, your sphinxter contracts. Try a very slow and gentle entry

Answer 11

Less painful-the more you do it, the less painful it is. Try gels to lubricate the area.

Less nasty-NEVER! It's always going to be nasty, because it is not natural!

But it's a choice and that's your right.