2006-11-29 11:29:36 · 9 answers · asked by ?~GotLove~? 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Brandi, many parents have a tough time letting go of their parental duties. They would rather treat you as a teenager instead of an adult to not lose their grip on the fantasy of being able to control you. Many other parents do it because they feel they have the only opinions that count. They may want to control your life in order to reach a goal they could never reach themselves. Many others do it because it makes them feel powerful. Many do it because it is their way of protecting you from the evils of the world. Be it what it may, you have to either make them understand that as the adult you are, you can fend for yourself and the decisions you make, be they right, wrong or indifferent, are your prerogative. You have to find what the consequences for your own actions are. You have to live your life to the best of your ability. The one thing that will definitely change their attitude towards you is to you show resolve through consistency in the assertiveness you apply to get your will.
2006-11-29 11:41:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you an 'only child' or 'only girl' ? I will tell you about my daughter and myself, she is 36 now, and she doesnt live with me, but I miss her so much, I dont see her very often and when I do, she is so full of misery and sadness and wants to unload all her problems onto me, so I listen, AND, I used to always give her advice, which yes, ended up being a lesson, or telling her how to handle a situation. I had a reason to have some councilling awhile ago, and during the course of this, I was told, "if I think I can fix everyones problem, I am crazier than the councillor thought I was", because during my sessions, I was getting stressed about everyone else's problems, because I could not help them. Now, when she comes to visit, which is not often, I just sit and listen, and offer her only my ears. Just recently she had said to me, Please mum, let me work out my own solutions, which of course, hurt me somewhat, but I realize now, she has a brain, and can do it for herself. I appear to have done this because at her age of 4, we were alone, just her and me, and I had to be friend, mother, father, advisor, and I found it extremely hard to stop doing that, because I always felt that I owed her that because I took her away from a family life, (divorced her dad) and yes, we struggled but we survived, but I just couldnt stop be the 'head of the family' so to speak. She also told me to stop treating her like a little girl, now I have realized that she is 36, and doesnt need my control, but just my love and understanding. Whoever it is in your family that treats you like this, have a talk to them about it, calmly, and start making your own decisions without discussion with them, this will show them that you are capable of making them yourself. I hope this has been of help to you. Good Luck
2006-11-29 19:56:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
because in ther eyes you will there baby even when you r 50 years old. dont worry it will get a littlr better when you move out
2006-11-29 19:34:47 · answer #3 · answered by whiteangel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
cause they love u and still think ur a child to them which we will all be even if were 60 and so on.
2006-11-29 19:32:32 · answer #4 · answered by Hally berry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To them, you'll always be a baby even when you're 60.
2006-11-29 19:33:25 · answer #5 · answered by darkdiva 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because to them you are still a kid.
2006-11-29 19:31:38 · answer #6 · answered by pilljills 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel sorda...just keep acting as responsively as possable and they will see hopefully.
2006-11-29 19:32:11 · answer #7 · answered by StarWarsFanatic 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you the only child or only girl.? that's probably the reason.
2006-11-29 19:32:09 · answer #8 · answered by winter 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol, be an adult. move out.
2006-11-29 19:33:41 · answer #9 · answered by Henry P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋