How do i find guys to be with or hook up with even though im in the closet and dont plan on coming out anytime soon thanx. And im 16 so where can I find guys around my age besides school or big open social places since im in the closet.
2006-11-29 10:50:52 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Hi,
My heart really does go out to you because this is a very touchy question. For starters I am not gay I am a woman but all my friend are gay and I did call one of them to ask him, so I can understand you. I do not want to suggest something inappropriate, for you are only 16 so gay clubs/bars are out of the questions. That is where my friend and I go dancing. We really have a blast unlike regular clubs.
But anyhow,
It may be a bit challenging since you are not ready to come out of the closet. l
Look in to the Internet for say some kind of under age/legal club or groups in your area. Since you are not ready to come out I would not look to much into school for kids could be very mean and can make it even more difficult for you until you are truly ready to come out. I wish I could give you a better answer but just try and look into that and I hope it will help.
You take care :-)
ALEX
2006-11-29 11:15:04 · answer #1 · answered by Alexandra Solano 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The internet sounds like your only option if you try to search locally and even that requires being very careful. It's really tough being in the closet. I'm a girl and have many gay friends (a bit too old for you, I'm afraid), but the best solution is to be comfortable with who you are, regardless of how others might feel or think about you. If your partner is out of the closet then a relationship between you might be difficult for him because he has to keep it a secret and sneak around about it. Just be happy about yourself, you are who you are and that's beautiful and who cares what ppl think about that, they don't understand. With all the straight guys out there, the only way to find out where the gay ones are is to be open with yourself and your sexuality, that way they know where to go. Perhaps the local ones in your school or town are in the same or similar position. One of you will have to make the move.
2006-11-29 10:59:04 · answer #2 · answered by abgurlie2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
online. I'm sure you can find a gay chat room. And then you will most certainly find a guy your age. At least around where I live too we have something like Live Links, but for gays. And you call, and get connected to other people in your area who are looking to talk to guys just like you. But I'll tell you this one thing: A gay guy who is proud of his predilections, is not going to want to be with a guy who is in the closet. I know it's hard especially since you're in high school, and they are so judgemental at that age. But I promise you it will get easier and better in just a couple more years when you go to college. There everybody will be testing their boundaries.
2006-11-29 10:56:32 · answer #3 · answered by Smitten_Kitten 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many intresting websites..In fact, right here at Yahoo Groups I believe there are several groups for young gay folks. Other than that, you can lie about your age and put a personal ad on wedsites that cater to "hooking up", but being only 16, I could several problems that you and your potential mate might encounter. I would suggest the teen groups first..Put teenege gay in search and see what happens. Regardless, be careful out there!
2006-11-29 10:56:32 · answer #4 · answered by sckreet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on where in the US you are. In the northeast if you have access to any city there are gay youth groups. The same goes largely for CA and the west coast. Elsewhere, the availability is going to vary.
If you are willing to tell me what city you are near, I will see what I can do to find out what youth groups might be near you, if any.
Kind thoughts,
Reyn
believeinyou24@yahoo.com
PS I hope you don't stay in the closet for ever, its lonely in there. Find someone nice to love. Remember you are GREAT! I just read some of your other questions and I am so sorry that you hate yourself so much. *hug* There is NOTHING wrong with you. Homosexuality is not dirty or unnatural, it exists in nearly every animal species studied, including pair bonding among animal species that have pair bonding among heterosexual members. There is nothing wrong with you. NOTHING. You just are who you are. I wish I could help. My church is gay affirming, and totally accepting, my partner's faith group (he is Wiccan) is also 100% accepting, I will add you to the prayers of the people -- that you might find peace with who you are and be happy as a young gay man. Anything we can do to help you, just contact me. Believe in yourself, you are good. You are good!
2006-11-29 10:54:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's hard let me just say. Try Clubs, bookstores, anywhere... your going to HAVE to talk to people, closed mouths don't get fed. Maybe the Internet as well but be careful there are some crazy ppl out there!!!
Good Luck Boy.
2006-11-29 11:34:22 · answer #6 · answered by Cincere80'sBabe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure there's other guys hiding in the closet with you, just turn on the closet light.
2006-11-29 11:01:59 · answer #7 · answered by What'd You Say? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This can be a very difficult thing to do. I think the question you really need to ask is how can you become accepting of yourself enough to admit who you are. Only then will you be in any position to start thinking about relationships.
2006-11-29 10:54:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all I am straight... BUT I believe that we should be PROUD of who we are!! If you are Bi Or gay then you should be proud. and screw what others think. Just open up the closet door and say WHAT UP!!!! LOL Good Luck!!!!
2006-11-29 11:09:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Try Craig's list.com. It's a great website for absolutely EVERYTHING in your city (and across the world).
2006-11-29 10:54:35 · answer #10 · answered by Audania 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋