I really don't know the guy I am getting married to, it is our tradition that our family select the perfect groom for us. I am in love with someone else I have been with him since 8 months. He loves me too but he works in a sensitive politic position that he is not aloud to get married to any lady that has a parent from certain countries, as my mum she is from one of these countries, we can get married. The thing is till when we will be like this??? I am just confused I need some advice.
2006-11-29 09:47:32 · 13 answers · asked by JO JO 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't have to marry anyone you don't want to. This is a free country. You will probably be very unhappy if you marry someone you are not in love with.
2006-11-29 09:53:34 · answer #1 · answered by krystal s 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The institution whereby men and women are joined in a special kind of social and legal dependence for the purpose of founding and maintaining a family. A sexually exclusive and equitable love relationship entered into voluntarily by two adults, solemnized by vows and recognized by themselves and others as the highest romantic achievement possible between two people. : a marriage in which the parents choose a bride or bridegroom for their son or daughter the bride and bridegromm have not seen or may be seen but they get in love and affection only after the marriage is known as arrange marriage a love marraige is a choose of bride and bridegroom by themselves they love each other for many years they diagree their parents decisson and are bonded with eachother , they no the postive and nagative factor of partners they are good frnds of each other before marriage and they are marride and they live happily sometimes there can be problems but mostly they aresuceesfull
2016-03-29 16:13:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a very difficult position to be in and It's a pity but life has to go on. It sounds like your new love of 8 months may not be in the position to marry you as result of his work. It also sounds like even if he wants to marry you, your tradition may not allow him to do so.
The question here is, supposing your parents may agree to choose your new guy for you, can he for the love of you find another job that will allow him to marry you?
Moreover, in other to be in good terms with your culture and tradition, work with you Mum in finding a partner from your culture. She can get your Dad to choose him for you.
Finally, since you now live in another culture, I suppose, there may be people who 've found themselve in the same situation with you, find out how their situations were resolved and know whether it would help you in making an informed decision. I hope this will help you as I wish you good luck.
2006-11-29 10:15:22 · answer #3 · answered by Melody 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you ????? Are you old enough to make your own decitions ??? You should not marry anyone that you don't love and the one you love can't marry you????T hen it is hard to make a decition but don't take the bad choice of getting married just because it is a tradition you have your rigths too!!! And for the guy you love but can't get married to then live your life have time for you to have fun and maybe you will find someone you will love and love you back and will be able to marry with no problem , you have being with this guy 8 months & think it is a short time to be thinking about getting marrried with him don't you think??? Do what you feel it is better to you just think straigth on the decition you want it is your happiness and your freedom GOOD LUCK AND BEST WISHES!!!!
2006-11-29 09:57:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand traditions however as part of your rights it is your choice to choose who you want to marry. This is a sacred thing that is not to be entered into lightly. Your current boyfriend will not be in that position forever. The question is does he want to marry you?
It should be your choice unless honoring you families traditions are more important to you than love.
2006-11-29 09:58:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you live in America, it's your right to marry whoever you want. Exercise that right. But, if the man you love is not available, might as well go with what the parents say.
2006-11-29 09:50:35 · answer #6 · answered by Ade 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is strictly cultural and only you can determine what is more important to you.
That said, the guy you are in love with isn't exactly ready to commit (for no matter what reason, it's all B.S.)
Maybe your parents, under the given circumstances, have the right idea.
2006-11-29 09:57:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is going to sound cheesy, but watch the movie 'bend it like becham' (its about kids ... but hey it is the theme that is important)
The girl had strict parents, but in the end (without ruining the movie too much) her parents wanted her to be happy.
Don't you think your parents want you to be happy too?
2006-11-29 09:52:35 · answer #8 · answered by krillin5959 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when did religion become racist. If you want to marry him then do it. if you are insulting your gad then ask yourself what religion could ask you to be miserable and possibly abused by the so called perfect person your parents chose for you.. You decide..
2006-11-29 10:22:51 · answer #9 · answered by bluedanube69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand its a tradition but you shouldnt marry if your not in love.
2006-11-29 09:50:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋