I have been in and out of a relationship with my son's dad for almost 5yrs now, and just a year ago we got back together after he left me to live with another women, and I was 7mos pregnant. During this time I am pregnant again with our second child which is due in December. My problem with this is still the same. He wants his cake and eat it to, but I can't tolorate him and his dishonesty anymore. He wants to date other women, but still live with me and come and go as he pleases. I have asked him numerous of times to not call other women from our home and he still does. He wants to come in at early morning hours ie, 3&6am and totally has no respect for me. He doesn't work. I pay all the bills and because I ask for respect he says that he's not going to change, so I asked him to leave. Now I am 8mos pregnant with a 2yr old and confused. I just can't keep going through this with him and he says that I'm wrong to put him out. Help me on this!
2006-11-29 08:35:42 · 10 answers · asked by teebaby39 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I feel that I can share some advice with you because "Been there, Done that!!!".
Honestly I have the impression you are talking about someone I know.
The best thing I did was say "Goodbye!"
It was really hard to do but my life went from bad to wonderful.
And, today my kids are happy and I'm happily married and I am happy!
Think about your kids and ask yourself "What is best for them?", "How is this going to affect their future?", "What kind of adults are they going to become if I stay in this relationship?"
And, you will find the answers but don't stop there ask yourself "What is my worth?", "Wasn't I created to have happiness?", "Where do I want to be in a month, a year, ten years?"
You are an amazing woman and you are raising amazing children.
Do not let anyone destroy that!
I wish you all the luck and I hope this has helped!
I wish you the best!
2006-11-29 09:06:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I is hard to hear but; you need to leave him. He is not going to change, he told you himself. He doesn't seem to much of a family man and you are there catering to his every need and paying the bills. I think you probably take him back because of the kids. How is staying with him helpful to the kids? If you are a wreck, regardless of age, children pick up on it. Instead of asking him to give you respect, have respect for yourself and move on. If he won't go, you go and take the kids with you. I he threatens you, leave when he is not home. You must have a friend or a family member that you could stay with until you found a place. You must stop wasting your time and energy on a man who is never going to change and will never love you. Good luck to you.
2006-11-29 08:45:53 · answer #2 · answered by bellbottombleus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wee TeeBaby personally I think that you are a very wise woman to have given him the travel card. Everyone wants to feel wanted, needed and loved by their mates and it certainly does not sound like you are receiving any of these things. They say that once is a mistake, twice is a concern and three times is a habit, so please do not allow yourself to get into this scenario. Life is too short and believe it or not there are men out there who will accept you and your children and treat you with respect also. Stand up for your rights and do not allow this man to use you the way he is. Perhaps one of the other woman that he is so interested in will pay his freight (yeah right) and put up with this behaviour that you have been putting up with. Believe in yourself and do what is right for the kids also as they don't need to witness this in their lives either.
2006-11-29 08:42:21 · answer #3 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gurl you deserve better remember that he left you before for another woman and he is cheating on you know so you can tell that he doesn't want you anymore(SORRY)but he don't know another woman that will pay all the bills for him and let him called other females on the phone you deserve a lot better but i know how you feel even though by problems are not are complexed i know how you feel to give your everyhing to make something work all i can say is use your HEAD good LUCK
2006-11-29 08:44:21 · answer #4 · answered by ~MISS SEXINESS~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it seems that he wants his cake and eat it too. He has already proved to you that he's not trustworthy. Knowing this, my advice to you is to dump him, kick him out of your house, and then make him pay your child support. If he hasn't committed to you yet, then he most probably he never will. Let him go and become someone else's problem. You deserve so much better, plus you'll have 2 kids to have to worry about. There are plenty of guys out there (believe it or not) that will treat you right, and raise your kids as their own. Since he doesn't want to grow up, you're going to have to do it for him. He may say that you're wrong to put him out, but why submit yourself to all that heartache....plus whatever decision you make, your kids will be affected by it....so you'll have to think of them and make the right decision. Kick him to the curb, and you'll be happier in the long run. Best of luck to you.
2006-11-29 08:51:21 · answer #5 · answered by cajunrescuemedic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey sweetie don't put yourself through this especially being pregnant. If you had a friend in this same situation what advice would you give her? Take your on advice. But I will say you don't deserve this or any other woman for that matter. Good luck sweetie.
2006-11-29 08:43:57 · answer #6 · answered by SimplyYoung 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there im so sorry that you are in this mess .....and think you already know what you should do with this sliume ball.........get shot of him .....he is using you and will not move out while he has this free meal ticket and this is you ......sweetheart you will have to be strong and loss this heavy weight round youre neck and believe it or not you will feel so much better when this is done ......he is treating you with no respect and no thought for youre unborn baby the three of you deserve so much more and better than this ......good luck and take care xx
2006-11-29 08:42:42 · answer #7 · answered by a parent hows been there !! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to put him out.... You do NOT deserve this. You need to think of you and your children. Tell him to leave, don't take him back..... You can make it! You have done it this long with taking care of a two year old and one on the way! You can go further!
Be Happy
2006-11-29 08:40:39 · answer #8 · answered by MC 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOu need to stand up for yourself and stop lettin him treat you like a door mat Im sure your a great woman who can do great things so dont let a man pull you down! And plz stop puttin your son through that its not healthy for him and you know it. the dad can pay child support or somthing but you need to get way from that!
2006-11-29 08:40:05 · answer #9 · answered by Kat_77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl give his *** an ultimatum. Your responsibility is to your children if they see him treating you like they will think it's ok to do the same thing
2006-11-29 08:49:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋