I've always dreamed of having a family of my own, starting something and doing it better than my parents did. I'm 21 and I've had uprotected sex several times. I'm not actually trying to have a baby, but I'm not actively trying NOT to either. I'm now getting married in the next few months and my fiance' has also always dreamed of having a family, I'm terrified that I'm not able to have children. And if I find out that I cant, I dont think I'm going to marry him. I dont want to take that right, that happiness of having children away from him, simply because I cant have them. And we've thought about adoption and both agree, that its just not the same...we want the entire experience, not just the baby; the pregnacy and the whole nine yards....should i leave him if i find out that I cant have children?
2006-11-29 06:36:22 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Nope. Having unprotected sex a few times at your age does not mean you're infertile, just lucky! Remember that the person you choose to spend your life with until the lights go out is going to be there both before your children come, and after your children are grown and on their own. So, get married, enjoy your new life together, and then start trying to have children. If after a year or so you're not pregnant, talk to your doctor about getting some tests to see what's up. There are fertility treatments available now that weren't even available 5-10 years ago (for instance, ICSI). So just focus on each other for now, and the babies will come. Good luck!
2006-11-29 06:41:42 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs. Strain 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You worry too much, first of all. You need to ask yourself if anybody kicked, hit,ect, in the balls when you were younger.IF not, give yourself a year of doing it every other day with your wife, then if she is not pregnant, then their is a cause or reason for concern. Lucky for you,if you or her are having problems concieving a child, then you go get checked at any time by a u.a. doc and her gynocoligist. And just for kicks,if these docs found a reason for not concieving, then you'll have to spend money and do something like a invetro-baby. For goodness sakes boy, enjoy the sex and it will happen in time, don't worry about it. Worry could cause 0problems with her concieving not YOU!!!!! Hope you don'y get an ulcer over this.
2006-11-29 06:55:47 · answer #2 · answered by mdzevolveddammit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
would you leave him if he only had one leg?...i mean its the same thing...you do not fall in love with someone and/or decide your fate with or without them simply because of what they can or cannot give to you...this other person should not love you any less because you cannot fulfill a want that he has.... first, there are other alternatives...second you dont know that you cant have children so why dont you cross that bridge when you come to it...did he ask you to marry him contigent upon your having a child?...you need to remember that having someone else in your life in this capacity is not because of what can be selfishly gained but because they enhance who you are as a person already! discuss this issue with you fiance and get his perspective on the matter...if he is so shallow that he would leave you then you are better off and hes done you a favor because honey if he'll hang you out to dry for this imagine your life ten years from now when you are divorced and trying to get child support from him for the child you actually did have
2006-11-29 06:52:17 · answer #3 · answered by cookiesmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether you carry a child for nine months or give a motherless child a home they are both wonderful, fullfilling experiences. I'm pregnant now with my first and want to adopt the second. It comes down to whether you can love a child you didn't produce. Sounds like you are being paranoid anyway, give it time, more than likely you will get pregnant.
2006-11-29 06:40:49 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO!! Of course not. That would be a pretty lame excuse to end a relationship. I never could have children and I adopted my son, who is now 16 years old. And I can't imagine that I'd feel any different about him if I had given birth to him!! I'm not saying you'll have to adopt, but no--don't leave him if you can't have children.
2006-11-29 06:40:35 · answer #5 · answered by spelling nazi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless there is reason you think you cant have kids try not to worry. If there is a reason Get the test done and find out if you can. There are other way of bringing a child up together. if he loves you then he will stick by you. good luck
2006-11-29 06:41:51 · answer #6 · answered by debbie s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW you sound exactly like me 5 months ago, and im pregnant. Im 21 and wanted to have a baby and i kept trying and nothing nothing nothing, but when i least expected it i got it. So dont worry, maybe get an ovulating kit and see when your most fertile and try around that time!!! GOOD LUCK
2006-11-29 06:50:18 · answer #7 · answered by ReRe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No...that's a ridicilous erason not to be with someone. Go to your Dr and first find out if you are ovulating...you go for a blood test on teh 21st day of your cycle to test for progesterone. Maybe you dhould also speak to him and find out what he thinks as well..what if he is infertile?? Would you really want him to not marry you?
2006-11-29 06:45:18 · answer #8 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i don't think you should. because i din't get pregnant right away . i took the pill for a bit then i got pregnant . so maybe you should try this frist and if he loves you ,he'll love you nomatter what .do you love him ? god will find a way for ya'll to have a baby of your own
2006-11-29 06:43:57 · answer #9 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋