We have been together for 5 years, 3 1/2 of those living together. We seperated this summer and I am trying to sell my house and move away. We still see each other every day and talk all the time. I was hoping a change would make things better. He is the love of my life but it is really going nowhere as he is an alcoholic.
2006-11-29 03:35:12 · 14 answers · asked by moving-on 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If this relationship was a long one it can be particularly hard to overcome. My advice to you is when we walk the path of life with another very often when they leave a huge hole is left in our lives. I would suggest you allow that hole in your life to heal rather than try to force someone else in what is and will become a poorly fitting gap. Lots of people make this mistake and compound often minor mistakes in doing so. This can lead to tragedy and heartache for both parties involved. Get used to walking the path of life alone again before you think about walking with anyone else. this isn't a race, In the end your heart will thank you.
2006-11-29 03:44:04 · answer #1 · answered by Cff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same sort of thing, and I thought that if we went our separate ways, he would realize that I was more important than alcohol, but it didn't work out that way. We have been apart for several years now and I still miss him terribly. We have both moved on, but I'm still not over him and don't know if I will ever be. So, to answer your question, I don't think there's really any way to get over someone. You just have to hope that you find someone else that you can love as much or more.
And it really helps if you surround yourself with friends so that you will have plenty of things to occupy your time. And don't get into another relationship if you're not sure about the guy right away. If you get with a new guy just to try to occupy yourself or because you would rather not be single, you will eventually miss your ex and just end up hurting yourself and the new guy in the long run.
2006-11-29 11:42:39 · answer #2 · answered by cause0im0broken 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am really sorry bout that. Some ppl say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else! I really dont sugest this method. It does feel good (maybe )short term but in the end will leave you with regrets and emptiness. Time, Time,TIme is the only way it is like a death. You have to mourne. Then move on. I really dont suggest selling your house and moving away! that sounds very drastic. I know it is hard. By the way i live in the same small town as my ex-wife we have a boy together. I almost died when i saw her with another guy. And her the same towards me im sure. But we r fine today. Im sure she would have regretted selling a house she worked all her life to get. hope this helps!
2006-11-29 11:46:42 · answer #3 · answered by pato 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not easy to do but you must occupy your time doing other things don't sit around and mope. There are many nice people in the world you just need to get out of the house and find them. If indeed he's an alcoholic and will not seek help then he really doesn't think much of your relationship. Think of yourself and go out and have fun!!
2006-11-29 11:45:14 · answer #4 · answered by supressdesires 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you see each other everyday? Is it intentional or accidental?
If you are done with him then you need to break it off completely.
If he is an alcoholic he WILL NOT stop drinking unless HE wants to.
There is nothing you can do or say to change him, it's all up to him. You can try to make him go to AA but if it's not where he WANTS to be then it is a waste of time.
I wish you all the strength you need to let go!!
2006-11-29 11:51:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
GURL, get away from him! I dated an alcholic for quite some time and we lived together also. He is not going to change for you. He will only do this for himself. Believe me, it is not fun living with an alcoholic (but you already know this). You do not want to be involved when something bad happens (DUI, wrecks, arrests, domestic battery) and it eventually will.
You move on. Go out with friends. Become a SCUBA diver. Find a new boyfriend. Anything.
2006-11-29 11:41:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I strongly suggest that you don't keep in contact with you ex. Every time you see him will hurt you and slow your heeling process. Once you sell your house and move away, don't give him any possible way to keep in touch. It's not going to be easy, but in the long term you will be better off. Good luck!
2006-11-29 11:38:13 · answer #7 · answered by tannedknight45 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must get over it! RUN, don't walk away fromt the situation. Alcoholics are nothing but bad news! You will find someone else. Don't see him anymore. You can't change him. Moving is a really good idea!
2006-11-29 11:38:54 · answer #8 · answered by righteousrose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An alcoholic is not himself, he's a walking bottle. How long has he been on the bottle? If you truly love each other you both need help. try AA (alcoholics anonymous) If there's something there to fight for stop the excuses and FIGHT !!!
2006-11-29 11:40:34 · answer #9 · answered by hell_bent_grumpy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I kind of had the same problem but mine just left because he wanted to sleep with other girls and I wasn't o.k. with it.
I hoped everything we had would be enough to bring him back to me but it wasn't. And I was not o.k., I still love him and can't believe we are apart but it wasn't until I stopped talking to him that I began to heal.
If you absolutely HAVE to stay in touch with him, try letters or e-mail but not something where you have to hear his voice. And don't see him. Good luck, I'll pray for ya too...
2006-11-29 11:44:24 · answer #10 · answered by love_n_hate84 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋