me and my husband are haveing problems he resently cheated on me and we are trying to get over it. he has told me he still has feelings for her but he loves me and it wont happen again. well I wanted to know if anyone has any ideas on how to relite our fire or maybe just how to make sure he sees what he would loose if he did it again to me. maybe somethings to make life for fun
2006-11-29 03:25:10 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hate to tell you, but if he already cheated AND says he still has feelings for her, he's going to do this again. It's admirable that you have forgiven him and are trying to work on your marriage but it doesn't sound as though he has truly let this other relationship go and given the chance sounds as though he would dip his spoon in the candy again.
Unlike what others here are saying sex doesn't cure a failing marriage. Just like alcohol doesn't make problems go away.
2006-11-29 03:34:17 · answer #1 · answered by www.treasuretrooper.com/186861 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ok!! I just went through a divorce and 5 years ago right after we had our first child...I found my husband cheating on me. We went to counseling and I did everything under the moon to be noticed. Just like all of these things. Went out with the girlfriends dressed sexy. Draw baths and asked him to join in. Well, he cheated 3 more times. He even told me he didn't care about the others. You are setting yourself up for more hurt. Cheaters are trying to fill a void in there life and has nothing to do with either you or I. They fill it with the thrills of cheating. If he loves you then he needs to not cheat and communicate with you what is bothering him. Don't turn the blind cheek. There are so many fish in the sea and somebody will treat you the way you should be treated. I bet you will get noticed if you left him...he probably does not think you ever will. Mine didn't. He even would tell me I was afraid to be on my own. I wasn't I just wanted my marriage to work because i truly loved him. I know it hurts...I still hurt today...
2006-11-29 04:05:42 · answer #2 · answered by SW 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, what makes you think you were the reason he cheated in the first place? If your husband cheated on you then why are you the one trying to make him interested again. The problem is with your husband. You said he admitted to having feelings for this other woman, that's what is holding him up from you. I'm sorry, but he will never give you his full undivided attention until he gets over the other woman. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, I'm trying to make you realize that you are not the one at fault for him cheating. I understand that you love him, but the fact that he still has feelings for her means that this very well could indeed happen again very soon. I wish you all the best of luck.
2006-11-29 03:34:40 · answer #3 · answered by cookie 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well let me tell you from experience the fact that you didnt leave him this time especially even though he said he still has feelings for her-means he will do it again. I've been through it..My mans cheating even turned into another child. How would you live with that? Its not easy I will tell you that much. I suppose everyone desreves a secong chance but for him to tell you he has feelings for her. Thats a little deep. But thats on you. To make him notice you this is what you do....it works. Dont change you unless you are really boring....make sure you are available to get "intimate" whenever. That was my problem...I never wanted to do it. Make sure you do still consider your looks. If you let yourself get fat or scrubby then can you blame him?Otherwise make sur eyou stay strong and confident....because its not your problem he did that. its his.
2006-11-29 03:34:21 · answer #4 · answered by Yellowtulips 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He still has feelings for her? Sounds like the beginning of the end I am afraid. They didn't have a fling, they have a relationship. That isn't cheating, it's outright betrayal of your marriage. It is up to you to deal with their relationship. I certainly cannot judge. I just know I would not deal with the situation as casually as you. If you have to "trick" him into not doing it again, is it REALLY want you want? Sorry I didn't give much of an answer.... more things to consider than an answer. I wish you guys all the luck in the world.
2006-11-29 03:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by Scott M 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, it happened me too, a year ago i caught my hubby cheating on me, and luckily i got over with it and now im getting back on him, and see how he feels, but he still doesnt know about that. He doesnt deserve to know, so u should just go out with ur girlfriends sometimes, and have fun. Not worth to be there for ur hubby all the time, and he will realize u will have more fun for urself than with him, it happened exactly to us, now he doesnt want me to go out at all, i still do, cuz life is pretty short, so get out there and have fun for urself, all rite
2006-11-29 03:32:14 · answer #6 · answered by Confused kitty 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
hmm let's see ur husband cheated on you once!!! how do u kno if he will cheat on you again? why would u want to relite the passion you have for him when he loves another woman? i know im souding mean but im just askin why would u want to?
2006-11-29 03:28:15 · answer #7 · answered by ♥Filipina Paradise♥♥ 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ummm, he cheated on you and he still has feelings for her? What are you doing? I'm sorry, but open your eyes! He doesn't love you if he can lie in bed with another.
2006-11-29 03:27:55 · answer #8 · answered by inlovewow 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When he comes home wear nothing but a towel and then drop the towel and smile with a sly grin .
2006-11-29 03:26:49 · answer #9 · answered by Triskelion 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Find the dirtiest sex fun you can and make him realise that this could be anytime he wanted... Find out his wildest dream and fantasy and make it come true...
2006-11-29 03:28:15 · answer #10 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋