At the age of nineteen i was waiting for my husband to be my first sexual experience and my last..Now that dream has been destroyed..I was raped at the age of nineteen and i still havent gotten over it..I am still cying out for help and justice after fifteen years..It has stopped every relationship/friendship i have ever had..I need help...Sexreally meant something to me back then and it still does..I do still know this man . I have made it my mission to never let him forget me,although i will him..
2006-11-29 02:27:21 · 14 answers · asked by Danielle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I wish someone had told you years ago that you could still look at yourself as a virgin even after the rape. You still could have saved yourself for your husband. You see, when you were raped it wasn't something you "gave" someone. It was something taken from you. You still had what was yours to "give" to your husband. Women in your situation should know the difference and still be treated as a virgin with a wonderful gift to give to your first love.
When your house is robbed and things taken does that mean from that point on all your possessions belong to other people? No, of course not. You lock your house up again and expect that it will not be robbed again. Just because you were robbed doesn't mean you leave your door open to anyone from then on.
I'm really sorry about what has happened in your life. I hope you can make some sense out of what I'm saying and start again. Good Luck to you and God Bless.
2006-11-29 02:39:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetness, what you went through was a very horrible ordeal and I know just how you feel. I lost my virginity at the age of 13 due to rape. I knew my rapiest as well and he was caught and served 3 years in jail. 3 years felt like a smack in the face, but at least it was something. I really do think you would benefit greatly from therapy. Please look up some rape crisis centers in your area, its for your best interest, you have carried this burden long enough and you deserve to be happy and you deserve to feel safe. As for forming relationships, you must be willing to realize that not all men are bad men. There really are GOOD men out there, you just have to take that chance and listen to your heart, not your head. I say this because your head is already conditioned to belive that men are just out to hurt you, so listen to your heart. Was your rapist ever charged with your rape? Did you receive any justice? If not, then that could have alot to do with your outlook on love and sex. You say that you still know this man and you will never let him forget you, yet you will. I can promise you that 1) you will NEVER forget what you have been through but with time, therapy and the right state of mind, you will think less and less of it. and 2) your rapist will forever have you on his consicience and you can take hope that one day, his time for judgement will come and he will have to face the toughest jury of all time. Please think about seeking therapy. It, with the support of friends and family i have managed to over come my fear of men and that allowed me to open my heart again to people around me and i am now 25, married to a wonderful man and a mother to 3 beautiful boys. My heart truly goes out to you and i hope that you find peace within yourself some day. God bless you.
2006-11-29 02:45:41 · answer #2 · answered by Danelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I am very sad to hear that, but it is in the past, and has been for many years, you have to have faith in whatever you believe in, and I know you dont understand why, but I truely think everything happens for a reason, all you can do is be positive and move on w/your life. He took your virginity away, and there's nothing you can do about that, so y dwell on the past? just look forward, and until that man is locked up, or you forgive him, it will always stay w/u, you have to let it go, and forgive him for his terrible sin. You have to be strong, and I know it's very difficult, but why waiste any more seconds of your life remembering the terrible event, try to be happy, and live life to it's fullest!!! Goodluck, and dont take it out on others what someone completely different did to you. take care! byby
2006-11-29 02:52:53 · answer #3 · answered by justachick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a perfect world this evil person would get his just reward. Unfortunately, we do not live in a world that is anywhere near perfect. Now, the only person that is being hurt is you. You need to seek counseling or whatever it takes to move on. Maybe you need to move to a different place to get a new start. Good luck lady. We're behind you all the way.
2006-11-29 02:35:14 · answer #4 · answered by Jabberwock 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not to make you feel any worse, but if you:
A. KNOW you need help, and
B. It has been this long and you still aren't over it, then...
WHY in the world are you seeking help HERE? You already know what to do... go get counseling! Your answers won't be found on this forum.
2006-11-29 02:31:35 · answer #5 · answered by Stretchy McSlapNuts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will not forget him unless you get some counseling. Was this crime reported? This low life piece of crap doesnt deserve to be walking on the same planet as you. Please get some help, living 15 years with this on and in your mind is not fair to you or your loved ones. I wish there was more I could say. My heart bleeds for you. I wish I could take your pain. God Bless and Please get some help
2006-11-29 02:35:13 · answer #6 · answered by hell_bent_grumpy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i will be praying for u because that is not an easy thing to go through ..like i always say if it didnt kill you it will make you stronger but at the same time just meditate in the Lord and practice making yourself happy and try not to think about it as much as you do i know its not an easy task but u gotta do what u gotta do to move on baby eveything is goin to be alright try goin to church more often.. counselin... that **** dont help u can fu*kin talk to anybody but n e ways i will be praying for u if u need me email me thuggababy15@yahoo.com... muah ...its gon b ok
2006-11-29 02:46:36 · answer #7 · answered by thuggababy15 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Get some counseling to put closure to this horrible incident
2006-11-29 02:29:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey i know what your feeling all i got to say is you don't have to forget about what happen to you but you cant let this guy get to you do what you like to do marry the guy you love when he ask you to marry him
2006-11-29 02:31:45 · answer #9 · answered by amber_crrr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SORRY FOR YOUR PAIN, U NEED TO SEEK COUNSELING TO HELP YOU
2006-11-29 02:31:44 · answer #10 · answered by KerryAnn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋