Sometimes, My wife cries at night ....???

Question

When we are laying in bed. I try to comfort her...but she won't let me, and she won't tell me what's wrong! What should I do?

Answer 1

Believe it or not, the last time a man told me this exact same thing, his wife was crying because of the guilt she was feeling over her recent affair that she finally got up enough nerve to let him know it had happened. Hope that's not the case with you. My advice would be to try and comfort her, and if that doesn't work because she won't let you come to her, then wait until she comes to you. If it lasts longer that you can take, seek professional help for the sake of your marriage. Don't let it go on too long, hopefully, she'll thank you in the long run. Good luck, and keep a box of Kleenex handy.

Answer 2

Being a female. I don't cry a lot but can understand why other women do. Depending on how old your wife might be, the cause can vary. Usually it's stress that's causing her to cry and that stress is probably related to you in some way or another and that is why she's not telling you. I'm not saying that you stress her out. It could be something like "you're a football fanatic and her co-working is also a football fanatic and won't stop talking about football at work. Your wife doesn't want to complain to you about it because maybe she thinks it will hurt your feeling so she's holding it all inside, which can make her cry". Retarded, mental, weird? Yes, women can be all that. But no matter what age your wife might be, women love to talk. If you can get her to open up she will spill everything. Make sure you set some time from any distraction before you get her to open up. It can really upset her if she's trying to spill to beans and the phone starts ringing or something.

Answer 3

Regardless of the fact that she acts like she doesn't want your comfort, she does. We women are tricky little creatures like that. She wants to tell you what's wrong, she probably just doesn't know how. You could try just laying close to her, hugging her. If she won't let you, then you can talk to her. Ask her if you did something to make her cry, and tell her love her. You obviously do, or you wouldn't care that she's hurting.

Don't give up. She needs to know you care.

Answer 4

Try to assure her that you are there for her whenever she decides she is ready to discuss what is bothering her. It is probably not best to try to push her to talk at the moment she is crying because she probably feels that if she explains it at that time she will probably just cry more....try approaching her in the morning or sometime during the following day and tell her how concerned you are about her crying and ask her to please discuss with you what the issues are so you can help her work through them. If she refuses to tell you then unfortunately there is not much you can do other than hold her and comfort her. Good luck to you!

Answer 5

Mourning takes distinctive steps for various human beings. i think of if crying takes various the soreness away, then cry female! Crying washes the soul, makes it experience all clean and new back. i understand that crying would be regarded upon as a weak spot, the weak spot isn't handling how U experience. i'm sorry your canines isn't with U impressive now yet attempt to fill your techniques with the solid circumstances.

Answer 6

Maybe she is afraid to tell you what is wrong. See if she will let you just hold her while she cries. Maybe this will help her build her courage up to tell you why. Don't push for answers, just let her know you are there when she's ready to talk and try to be understanding when she finally tells you.

Answer 7

I think you should seek marriage counseling, or couples counseling. It may be something serious that is effecting your wife. I say that because shes not communicating the problem with you. Thats not a good thing. Do you know if she is communicating with anybody about the problem? Your wife could be severely depressed.....get help asap. God bless you.

Answer 8

here are some thoughts:

If you have already tried to find out what's wrong, don't push it. tell her that you love her, that when she wants to share her thoughts, that you would love to know.....

you could tell her that it would make you feel better if you knew, so you wouldn't imagining all kinds of things- which you probably do.

it could be any number of things - from PMS to children to her work to your work to your sexual relationship to bad dreams - on and on and on...

and i know it sounds trite but God can give help... God is a great counsellor and friend, a "present help in time of trouble". As you pray for your wife, God will help....

and you need to pray that you will be supportive and sensitive to her concerns, whatever they are. She might be holding back something that she is afraid to tell you because she doesn't want to hurt you...who knows?.... But God can give you wisdom, strength, compassion....

no matter what the problem, as we turn it over to God, as we learn to "cast all of our care" upon Him, He is able to work in our hearts and our lives....

I know it to be true..... this is from someone whose wife has cried ALOT !!!

God bless!!

Answer 9

That sounds like a serious red flag. If she is not suffering from depression, she may feel guilty about something. Ask her straight out what is going on at a time when she is not crying, like maybe over dinner the next day.But not in an accusatory way. Tell her you're worried about her and love her and want to help. Is there any chance she may be unhappy with the marriage?

Answer 10

Keep on insisting to listen to her. Be gentle, hug her or hold her and she will eventually open up. Be persistent though. As I said before, if she doesn't want to talk, just hold her and tell her that you are there for her. It sounds like she depressed. Monitor her. Its obvious you care a great deal for her. She's lucky to have you in her life. Tell her that you are lucky to have her in your life.