don't tell me that it's wrong because I KNOW IT IS WROOOOOONG
but I can't help it, I love him but he has no idea, and I have no idea if he has feeling for me either, he is married and I am married, of course, too.
should I tell him? or should I tell my husband? what should I do?
2006-11-28 23:36:09 · 25 answers · asked by Gr8 G 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You should seek some counseling. Of course you should not tell him or your husband. You will be breaking up a great deal of family relationships. You probably need to rekindle the relationship with your husband. Put these thoughts out of your mind. I don't think this is a do able situation. Good luck and God bless****
2006-11-28 23:42:50 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Okay so you know that it is WROOOOOOOONG.... but do you really? Okay. about 3 years ago. I had cheated on my "boyfriend" who is now my husband with his brother. Yes you think it is the best thing to do. get your feelings out blah blah blah. But you know what. I regret it. I really do. If you do not love your husband anymore. Grow a pair and divorce him before you go and do something stupid. And not only that but his brother is also married..... Do you really want the reputation of being a "home wrecker" I sure as hell wouldn't. I'm sorry that you "love" two people. or maybe you just "love" one person. Do you even still love your husband anymore? Yes you know it's wrong... well then do something about it!! Stop your whining that you love someone other then your husband and like I said, grow a pair and let your husband find a woman who really loves him. Do you really want to go and wreck another woman's marriage? an entire family! and ya know, Lets say that you tell your husband, or you tell his brother. What if his brother doesn't even like you? Then you've screwed everything up because well. Brother's talk and if he thinks that his brother's wife is a umm. well I would tell my brother. You need to just forget about all of it. Just swallow any feelings that you have for him, Go kiss and hug your hubby and GROW UP! Good Luck with that.
Oh and I know that I've done something like what you are thinking of doing.... And let me tell you right now. Yes you and others might view me as a bad person, But I've asked for forgiveness and I am now married to him. (my boyfriend) and let me tell you. You do not want to do this. It seriously, ruins an entire family. RUINS IT!
2006-11-29 07:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same boat here . . .although my brother-in law isn't married. I love my husband and I love my brother-in-law too. I can't say one bad thing about my husband (he is damn near perfect). As you, I know it is wrong but I'm beside myself on what to do. I want to tell him so I can "get it off my chest" (that is what we woman like to do) but I honestly think it will blow up in my face either because he will feel the same way (which would make things more complicated) or I will push him away by telling him. My life feels like Jerry Springer right now. It probably makes total sense to just let it be and don't say or doing anything -- I have been doing that for months and it is killing me! I just wanted to respond to let you know you are not the only one out there . . .
2006-11-30 14:31:34 · answer #3 · answered by Same Boat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not love, that's infatuation. You're "in love" with the idea of him. I would not even entertain the idea. It could destroy your life, and the lives of your husband, his brother and his family. There might be something lacking in your marriage that you need to talk to your husband about. Go to a counselor ASAP and do individual counseling and couples counseling if needed. The grass is never greener on the other side. You made a vow to your husband and you just don't fall out of love with someone. If you have a good man by your side, do everything in your power to save that marriage. Good luck!
2006-11-29 07:45:44 · answer #4 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I too am in your shoes...except before I married my husband his brother & I had a one night thing and I have never been able to forget about it. I don't have any regrets, but not a day goes by that I don't think about that evening then I look at my husband and it just goes away. Try to concentrate on your husband and keep your fantansy to yourself. There is no need to ruin lives...
2006-12-01 08:09:47 · answer #5 · answered by Latina26 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For now don't tell nobody.. I mean you are in love with this man for no reason at all?? he hasn't given you any hint on whether he have feelings for you ? no girl, you might cause some real damage to your family if you bring this out.. There are things in life that aren't just meant to be and this is one of them. You have to accept that and leave it be.. Try not to gather with them your brother in law and family keep your distance and in time this feelings you have will pass.. unless of course he show you signs that he wants to have something with you and then you still should stay away... Think about it is just wrong... I know that sometimes cant be helped...I mean you cant help to have this feelings,my advice to you is dont act on them just let it go away by itself.. good luck.
2006-11-29 08:08:24 · answer #6 · answered by boricua_2290 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not not just wrong its disgusting you are suppose to be in love with the man you married Hope you don't have any kids in amongst all that crap. Perhaps you need to tell your husband to lift his game and pay attention or is that what its really about? Find something better to do with yourself.
2006-11-29 07:42:17 · answer #7 · answered by deb m 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
DO NOT tell anyone, and get the thoughts out of your head. The destruction to so many peoples lives and relationships (Husband/Wife, Brother/Brother etc etc etc) would be like pushing over the first domino in a long row. Once you've done it, it's over.
2006-11-29 07:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by robin_baker_uk 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's gonna sound really harsh, but...GET OVER IT! He's married, you're married. Why screw up not just your marriage, but his? If he felt that way about you, believe me, you'd know it. If you're not in love with your husband anymore, then getting out of your own marriage is one thing, but your brother-in-law, and especially his wife, don't deserve to have their marriage screwed up over what (sorry) is more than likely a major crush (which is completely normal by the way--I get them all the time--just not worth messing up my marriage for).
2006-11-29 07:43:59 · answer #9 · answered by SDC 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should not tell anyone and you should forget about it.
It is a disaster in waiting.
Cannot work... Will not work.
You will destroy a whole family and you will not get anything out of it... besides a lot of grief.
Grow up and be mature about this.
This is not Hollywood with its daily soap box.
2006-11-29 07:41:53 · answer #10 · answered by Aussies-Online 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋