She says she's not happy. She says she's not sure if I am where she wants to be in her future. We've been married 11 years, together 14. 2 children (10 & 5). I love her with all my heart and soul, but right now she has blocked me out. I am willing to do anything, and have ID'd my faults around the house and in parenting and have made the commitment to make those changes, not just for her, but for me, for my girls, and for us. I believe that if we can get through this we will have a stronger happier relationship.
2006-11-28 22:27:14 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ask her to go to marriage counseling with you...get the counselor to talk to you both...maybe you will get back into her heart or maybe you will not but give it a try.....she is lucky you are willing to try.
2006-11-28 22:30:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well she might be questioning , why did it take this long for you to listen and change?
Its too late , she could be saying,
And he killed my heart.
I believe its your fault and that she has been telling you over the years exactly what you've been doing to ruin it for her.
So you need to listen to all those past voices and do exactly what she's been asking.
And MORE, set up a romantic dinner, and buy her some nice romantic gifts from the heart. things she'd like
And turn off the TV.
TV and the computer could be whats doing it to her.
At least if its off you'll have time to concentrate on her and your daughters.
And last but not least, Get her pregnant, and she might not leave right away and that could by you the time you need to repair things.
and you could get a son out of it aswell.
So I am not saying getting pregnant solves problems, infact it does complicate things, but in your case you've been together 11 years, and your finacially capable. And I thing it could raise her hormone level and soften her heart.
But you would need to be the very doting husband and give her back rubs and truely support her,
Be at her beck and call.
At first you'd have to fake it but after a while you'll get used to is and make the most of it. And then she should warm up to it.
when she sees how great you change diapers and help out around the house.
But most of all its the way you respond to her,
Never disrespect her, treat her like royalty
tell her everyday how sorry you are and how much you appreciate all that she does and has done.
say it out loud to all your friends, admitt what a D.I.C you've been and CHANGE.
Hopefully this helps
Meg
2006-11-28 23:06:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a guy wants out it is a cry of frustration. If a girl wants out then there is nothing on earth that will change that. Ladies are extremely loyal and when that is over it is over. Have your honor and move on with grace. If love is to re spark it would not be by losinfg weight or buying flowers. seek professional help to get you through this. I know this is not the answer you want but it is reality, Do not threaten to kill yourself or beg it will mean nothing sadly. Stand up and get ready to be a good friend and parent you can always have that and perhaps that will re start the fire.
2006-11-28 22:34:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If u hve done any thing wrong or something that has been hurting ur wife so long....I THINK u should confess that u r sorry for all that u hve done knowing and unknowly....AND mostly for ur kids... it is necessary that they have both of the parents besides them till they stand on there own feet...and make her understand that kids are growing and they need both of the parents guidence and attention.
Trust me, from a person who has prior experience .....
Confess and talk to her and try to change for atleast ur KIDS....
THEY ARE INNOCENT.... TAKE CARE OF THEM AND UR SELF AND THE WHOLE FAMILY
All the best SIR
2006-11-28 22:33:48 · answer #4 · answered by sueann_love 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am sorry but maybe is too late for you to change, maybe you should have done it before.
But at least you can try to talk to her again, to convince her....but there are some people that if they once get out someone from their heart they never love that person anymore, i hope your wife is not that type of person because that's the end.
try again and tell her that she has to do it because of her daughters as well.
2006-11-28 22:34:41 · answer #5 · answered by Sara 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Locked out of the heart? Time to be a man and move on.
2006-11-29 02:54:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suggest a trial seperation for a few months & give her some time. She will appreciate it & she may end up missing you so much she wants you back.
The saying "you dont know what you've got 'til it's gone" fits here.
If you are there, available on tap whenever she wants you around, she may appreciate what she has with you less.
2006-11-28 22:33:45 · answer #7 · answered by Cori 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you show her that you can move on with your life without her, it will make her want you. If you beg, plead and so forth, it will convince her that you are needy, and needy isn't attractive. Your instincts will push you to beg, cry, and try to make her feel sorry for you. Ignore these instincts. Its not easy to do, but your chances are better if you show her that you able to live life without her.
2006-11-28 22:49:43 · answer #8 · answered by ckgene 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your wife is in a mid-life crisis---grass greener syndrome--and she's probably corresponding with another person online----and is infatuated with the idea---that someone out there wants her----...
I would suggest marriage counseling---and couples counseling and even seeing a sex therapist for help in re-kindling what is lost!
2006-11-28 22:42:12 · answer #9 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Seperate for 6 months and then revisit the options with her...Dont live together for the kids, it will kill you.
2006-11-29 00:13:55 · answer #10 · answered by Pumpkins 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋