My bf of the last three years and I are talking about marriage but I feel that he sometimes treats me as property and like i am beneath him. His family is well to say very very well off would be an understatement he went to Harvard.My family is upper middle class and hard working i went to Rutgers and then NYU.He buys me lots of nice things bags prada or coach etc. Even a new car for my birthday with nice jewlery and he lets me use his credit card for shopping .He works long hours and travels though and i feel as if i am being bought. I have a job and can pay for things myself but he gets offended if i do.He told me to take etiquette classes before we get married to prefect my skills, find new friends and that i have to change my wardrobe.He was not like this when we first met and i miss that person.I am having feelings also for another guy a male friend.I dont know what to do?
2006-11-28 15:01:53 · 15 answers · asked by Melanie D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He treats you the way he does because you seem to be taken by the gifts and the car and the entire life style. It's like he's buying you and because he is, you are now in debt to him and have to do what he says.
Just my take on it. I wouldn't accept expensive gifts anymore.
2006-11-28 15:05:22 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What you are describing is part of the lifestyle you have. People in my socio-economic status have to worry about paying rent etc - those are the issues you get....
but to cut to the quick of it -
He shows you that he values you in the things that he values:THINGS- and obviously he places a value on status - which is why he expects you to take etiqutte classes, make new freinsd, etc.
Tell him your valules - time with him, etc. Tell him that your requests for these classes, etc, make you feel belittled: something to be ashamed of - and then cross your fingers that he understands and you are able to find a compromise.
Good Luck Darlin -
2006-11-28 15:09:22 · answer #2 · answered by freshbliss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-13 16:27:08 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if you want a good, honest answer, you need to be honest yourself. Come on, I mean, Rutgers and then NYU?? Please. I'm currently enrolled in a menial community college and my grammar and spelling are better than this! Just ditch the guy. You'd be better off. And he may, too, just in case he DID go to Harvard.
2006-11-28 15:05:00 · answer #4 · answered by slowfreak 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i guess what u shld do is to think that what makes u happy the most.
if being with ur current man gives u happinest that u cldnt have with any other guy, then, appreciate him.
or else, if u feel like u r not u r when u r with him, then, i guess..u noe what u shld do rite?
all the best!!
2006-11-28 15:07:30 · answer #5 · answered by pink butterfly 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Run, hes turning you into a stepford wife.
If he asks you to sign a prenup, then you know he thinks of you as a piece of property.
2006-11-28 15:07:44 · answer #6 · answered by FF Geek 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't marry him. You are having doubts, listen to the now. if later down the line things change, marry him then but not now
2006-11-28 15:36:41 · answer #7 · answered by Leslie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Money or material things do not buy hapiness, or another guy.....please seek the Lord....that's where happiness is.....He loves us...God bless ya
2006-11-28 15:11:25 · answer #8 · answered by Bert 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your bf that you are not for sale....The person you met may be gone never to return...and go check out the other guy....
2006-11-28 15:09:04 · answer #9 · answered by Lrn'dTheHardWay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he wants you to change then he doesn't love you, your just another piece of property that has to look right and ncreases his standing.
tell him you are who you are , and you will not change either your appearance or friends just to please him. if he cant accept that then leave.
no man no matter how well of is worth not being happy for
2006-11-28 15:05:26 · answer #10 · answered by Scott G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋