Gold digger - my brother's fiancee is a gold digger. How can I bring some sense into him? Our family is very

Question

well off. My brother's fiancee comes from a lower middle class family. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this - don't get me wrong. So did my husband and my family accepted him and have always loved him and been very happy with him. Her case, however, is different. She only cares about money and keeps asking my brother for expensive gifts. She is very high maintenance. With her, it is always about the money. She told my brother to give her a job in the family business at $150K/year. Last week, my brother bought her a $80K Corvette. Now she wants an apartment with ocean view all in her name and wants my brother to pay $60,000 for her plastic surgery, which she obviously does not need. Yesterday she told me she wanted a diamond necklace at $10,000 and she wanted my brother to give her $20,000 so that she could lend one of her friends who is struggling. This is insane. My brother won't listen to me or my husband as we try to bring some sense into him. What can I do?

Thank you all for your answers. You have given me a lot of ideas on how to proceed with this situation.

My brother is the COO of the company and clients want to speak with him all the time. He practically runs 50% of the business. How can we cut him off without taking a big financial hit? I will talk to my dad to see what can be done about this. My dad is the CEO. My brother is not taking any money from the company funds but only his own. He makes a lot of money (over $1mil a year) and I am afraid that this woman will take almost all of it, if not all of it. I know she is after the money. I am almost certain that the "friend" she wants to lend the money to is one of the guys she sleeps around with.

Answer 1

apparently he loves her and I don't think anything you do or say is going to change that. If what you say is really true and she is just a gold digger, he will have to find that out for himself, when he does, he will do something about it. Until then, I'd just leave him alone and let him deal with it.

Answer 2

Unfortunately, he may have to find out the hard way to see what everyone else has been telling him all along. She's obviously using him for his money. Maybe if you get enough responses (obviously from those who don't know the family), you can print the page and show him that you and your husband aren't the only ones who can see what she's up to. Worse case scenario, make sure he gets an air tight prenup.....think, K-Fed and Britney Spears.....that's where this relationship is going...... he can get out now while he still has a bank account with some money in it. She's going to clean him out! I would absolutely not put anything in her name alone. She's trying to get things lined up so that when she leaves him, she can take everything as her own, so he can't contest anything. I wouldn't spend another dime until after a prenup and wedding, if there is going to be one.....As for her friend who needs the $20K, that's HER friend, she can loan her own money if she feels that bad for her. She also doesn't sound like she's worth $150K/year. I certainly wouldn't hire this girl for min. wage! He should dump her and tell her to get a job at Hooters when she gets her fake boobs or whatever else she wants done to her body, and she can make her own money. Your family has worked hard for their earnings, and this chick is going to destroy the business if he lets her work for them. She's bad news. Good luck.

Answer 3

Wow, this does seem excessive for this girl to want so much from her fiance. The thing is that the more you say the more he will run to her.

If nothing else take him out to lunch and really talk to him. Not the kind of talk when you are telling him what to do but the kind of talk where you are asking him what he thinks about her actions and intention. Listen b/c maybe he feels the same way you do but just doesn't know how to get out of it.

Answer 4

i sure wish i could find someone that i loved to care for me the way he is her. he sure is generous, he wants to help anyone else out, i am here, see i am middle class as you call it. which that does not make us dumn,just not as fortunate as you. i had money, but the system got mine. i felt sorry for people and gave them things also, so now, i am the one sitting in the cold. i would be homeless,if not for my family. no healthcare,or money or nothing but my pickup. he should be wary of this woman, there are many just like her out there. see, i am a woman also, and i could do just the same as she is, but i am not like that. but she has found her a sugar daddy. he needs to take her on a vacation somewhere that she would have nothing and see how she likes that. some women that do these things though, they can go to further measures to get all his money. tell him to be careful, and it is bad,though many people will take your life if they think they can benefit from it. if he loves her and is financially able, and she loves him also, i see nothing wrong with it.

Answer 5

nothing. if he will not listen and cannot see what is so obvious there is nothing anyone can do for him A fool and his money are soon parted and this girlfriend is just the one who can do it. She is going to take him for all she can get and then she will dump him because she does not care about him outside of a source of money. Too bad so all you can do is be there and not say I told you so when he gets his heart broken. Just tell him to be sure to put some of his money aside for himself becasue you are not going to give him any once this gold digger drains him dry and moves on.

Answer 6

would he consider a prenup? could he be 'cut off' from the family funds and inherritances? that probably doesnt make sense. damn i know nothing about rich ppl's affairs, i never met a gold digger in the poor community, we're all too worried about helping and contributing not self absorbtion. Tell him to buy her a $3.00 yellow rose and see if it lights up her eyes or pisses her off to buy something so 'inexpensive' might have to find a way to trick him into seeing what shes really all about, but love is blind and girl if he indulges her he cant see past his eyelashes.

Answer 7

COO? What is that? Never heard of it. (I've heard of a COOS but that's a derogatory remark usually towards a female) So are you saying your brother is a COOS? Oh by the way,,,it's your brother's life, if he is an adult he gets to make his own choices for a life's partner. Not you.

Answer 8

what would he mean to her if he was not rich? tell him to refuse her the next time she wanted something, and wait and see how she responds. if he marries her he needs to insist on a prenup, she appears to be very self centered, and focused on herself. he has a rude awakening if he marries her, his entire life will be buying her this and that, and if she doesn't get what she wants she will cause him grief. he is actually teaching her how to treat him by being able to make all of these demands on him.he needs to get rid of her now, and not marry such a selfish girl. she is out for the money and what the money can buy her, she is not really interested in your bro.

Answer 9

sounds like he`s in way over his head. I`m sorry, but i don`t think that there is much you can do! The more you will try to break him apart from her, the more he will resist! Try to find some dirt on her! Hire a Private Eye and have him follow her around, maybe she`s cheating on him as well as taking all his dough!

Answer 10

Take gold digger out behind the wood shed and teach her a few things. An altitude adjustment is a good word for this