I will meet him at the church tommorrow, he has two teenagers
2006-11-28 12:11:28 · 22 answers · asked by arctrisk 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dear Friend - Of course you must tell him you are sorry, but please do more, offer to spend time with him and with his teenagers doing things to help move on. Offer to drive the kids places. Offer to be there and to listen when he needs to talk.
One thing so many people do is after the funeral they just disappear and they treat you like you have cancer or death is catching or they tell you just to move on, time will heal, etc. and never let you TALK. Whew!!!!
Sorry, got excited. Good luck. GBU
2006-11-28 12:22:14 · answer #1 · answered by Dust in the Wind 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont go too deep into things as he is hurting and may not be ready to talk about it much. Let him know you are there for him and his family and that you will do anything to help them if need be. Tell him that you are sorry for his loss of course, and make sure you are available if he needs a shoulder to cry on. There are always the cliche things to say like "she in a better place now" which although its cliche is true. If she was suffering make sure to remind him that she isnt hurting anymore and that she will always be there looking down on him and his children. Im sorry for your friends loss and good luck to you and your friend and his family.
2006-11-28 12:14:48 · answer #2 · answered by ♥♫♥ Crystal ♥♫♥ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There are no words except: I am so sorry, if there is anything I can do let me know. I mean it. Just call me.
Of course these people need our help through this difficult time but they never call because they don't want to seem like a burden plus they are in mourning. We should keep closer contact but we don't.
2006-11-28 12:19:37 · answer #3 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him know that you are there for him and if he needs to talk you will be there i lost a daughter 9 years ago but i still like to talk about her it hard to find someone to talk to because everyone thinks it hurts too bad to bring up her name but i found that it is healing to be able to talk about her the grief process is very hard and he is probably blaming himself thinking he could have done something and he will get angry or feel numb pretend like it never happened they are all normal ways of the grief process just be there when he needs to vent or cry he will need you more when everyone else seems to have moved on because he will think everyone has forgot her 9 years later i understand the feelings i have went through i still have bad days especially birthdays and the anniversary of her death and i still talk about her to whoever will listen my best advice be there for the long haul and understand that grief has its own agenda
2006-11-28 12:22:46 · answer #4 · answered by linda y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about a simple "I'm here for anything that you need. I can't begin to imagine your pain and can only tell you that anything I can do to help you with this please, please call me and I'll be there for you".
Offer to shuffle family back and forth to the church, funeral home...do something that may be a daily routine for him that he can't do at this stage of the game..anything to ease some of the added problems that come with something at a time like this". Forget "I'm sorry for your loss"...He knows that.
2006-11-28 12:29:02 · answer #5 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are no magic words. It is a terrible loss. It will hurt forever. It will hurt less as time passes, but it will always hurt.
All you do is to say that you love him, that you'll be there to help with whatever he needs (house, children, chauffering, talking, crying, whatever), and that you will do it for as long as he needs it.
If you have children old enough, put them to work helping out too.
2006-11-28 12:18:15 · answer #6 · answered by Otis F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dang that sucks, well anyway man there really is not "a special way" way of saying im sorry but yeah I agree with the guy above a simple sorry would be enough.
2006-11-28 12:14:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont think you can really prepare for that. Just be there for them and pray for the right words to say tomorrow. I am sorry that you are experiencing this but seems like you care enough about him to want to say the right thing. God bless.
2006-11-28 12:15:09 · answer #8 · answered by mzagge06 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There isn't much you can say. Just make sure he knows you are there for him, basically be there to listen. Keep an eye on him and his kids and just be there, don't try to say too much they are all going to go through this in their own way, so like i said just be there to listen.
2006-11-28 12:15:51 · answer #9 · answered by Bubby'sGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you are sorry and let him know if he needs anything to let you know. Tell the children the same thing. A hug always helps too.
2006-11-28 12:16:53 · answer #10 · answered by Patty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋