She's good-looking...how can I make her believe me?

Question

I (16) have been going out with a girl (14) for a month now. I tell her all the time how beautiful I think she is, but she never believes me. She has a low self-esteem, but she goes so far as to call herself fat and ugly. Which she really isn't, at all. How can I make her believe she's attractive?

Answer 1

You can't.

For one, she's young. Ages 14-16 are hard times for girls, especially if you mature slowly. Even if she is the most gorgeous girl to you, you can't make her believe you.

Keep telling her. When she calls herself fat, point out that she doesn't need to put herself down to make her look more attractive to you.

If this is getting really bad, you need to have a serious heart-to-heart with her. Explain that you like her and see the most beautiful girl when you look at her, but you don't know how long you can continue to hold up both your esteems if she keeps being so hard on herself.

Find a way to break her of this habit. Maybe say her name each time she makes a degrading remark about herself. If she says a positive quality, she gets a hug.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Aren't you a sweetheart. It is very nice of you to want to help your girlfriend with her self esteem issues, but you can not make her believe or do anything - she will have to get over this herself.

Having said that, I will say that I have seen people help others through visualization. This is not a matter of forcing someone to change, it is a matter of putting out the positive energy needed to help this person find the space to change, as it were. If you could take 3-5 minutes to sit quietly and really picture your girl in your mind and see her happy and confident, you will be sending a message to her and the universe on an spirit level that will help her to see her own inner beauty. The more clearly you can see and feel this visualization, the faster it will work for you. If you do it faithfully (2 or 3 times a day every day) you could see results in as little as a week. I try to do mine when I wake up and when i go to sleep.

Peace!

Answer 3

Don't worry most girls of her age feel that way about themselves. Its a product of the magazines and videos that always show perfection. Its a sad lie. As that is not where true beauty really is. Speaking as an old guy who has been around a very long time you will always find greater happiness with a girl who has a beautiful heart then one with a beautiful face.

Dave

Answer 4

It's an adolecent thing. Don't kick yourself in the head too much. A lot of females (and males alike) go through a stage of self-realization and because of all the photoshoped models in billboards and mags, they think they need to achieve the same echolon of "beauty" as them. Just be persistant and keep on keeping at it.

Answer 5

YOU my dear can not make her believe anything. She has to see it herself. If she truly feels bad about herself then she will need to get over it. OR maybe she is 14 and loves the attention that you give to her when she says she is fat or ugly.."oooooh he really cares..tell me more!!!"

Answer 6

At that age it is almost impossible to make a girl feel pretty or they already know it and just want to hear you tell her over and over. You'll know if you stop telling her and she asks why you never tell her anymore.

Answer 7

Actions speak louder than words. Find a way to SHOW her that she is beautiful instead of just telling her.

Answer 8

This is corny but say
"want to see something really beautiful
that i have?"

she'll respond "yes"

and you say

"go look in the mirror"


Hahaha, hope it works.

Answer 9

Might sound crazy, but don't tell her things like that so often. If she hears it all the time it doesn't mean much but if she hears it when she's least expecting it it'll mean more.

Answer 10

im the same way with my bf and theres about nothing you can do seriously