hey dads is he going to stay mad at me?

Question

I told my dad that I'm pregnant and that I'm keeping the baby. He got so mad at me that I thought he was going to ather kill my ex-boyfriend (he's the father of my child and has agreed to help raise it), or have a heartitack or both. I got a wonderful job, a good paycheck, for someone just out of collage, and my own place. Lets just say for 15 minutes at my house the only christian questions that came out of my dads' mouth was what were you thinking, how do you plan to raise a child when you your self are pretty much a child? And I'm not a child anymore. Is he ever going to get the image of me five and in pigtails saying "daddy pick me up, pick me up"? I know I'll always be my dads' little girl and everything and that he still loves me, but I don't think he's ever been this mad at me, even when I thru a party while they (my parents) where gone.... please help me? I'm lost... I need my dad to be able to do this... I don't have anyone else to help me through this, my mom died a year ago

Answer 1

I think that he'll come around. Be patient and show him that you are responsible. If you have the means to raise this baby well then you are on the right track. Have paitence with your dad and I'll bet that when he holds his grandchild for the first time he'll be thrilled. :-)

Good luck and take care!! :-)

Answer 2

Well first of all, recognize that his response is not so much out of anger as it is out of hurt or disappointment. Part of this is probably is own questions about where he messed up that this could happen to his little girl.

And yes, you are out of college, and it sounds like you are being farily responsible, but even at your age, you still have a lot of growing and adjusting to do. As you settle in to the work world and assume full responsibility for yourself, things tend to change a bit. He knows this, and knows that you still have a lot ahead of you. He also knows the way a child ties a person down. He probably had envisioned you having some time to enjoy your adult status, then finding a good guy, getting married, and ... after an appropriate amount of time, having kids.

So, you've short circuited his image of your future.

All that said, I suspect he will come around. The shock of it all has to wear off. He needs time to process things. And, if you haven't already done it, you need to tell him that you need his support during this time. Don't make it sound like you're going to want him to be the babysitter or anything, but just that you need his emotional strength.

Good luck with it, but please try not to make any more babies before you get married. The child REALLY needs an at-home dad, just like you need yours.

Answer 3

Now, I know this is going to be easily said than done; however, do involve your dad as much as you can.

Ask questions on how him and your mom first found out about expecting you, the doctor's they use, any materials they have (family pass downs) that you would graciously take (maybe your mom has something she wanted to give you for this occassion for example).

When this baby is born, I imagine he will perk up.

He still is going to have a hard time knowing his little girl is not little anymore. When your child is that age, I know you will too have a hard time accepting it. Especially when you realize you are a grandma and some parents think that is when they realize they are getting "old"......mid life crisis ordeal.

Give your dad some time. You can't undue the past, but you sure can turn it into the better for the future.

Answer 4

Once he sees that little baby... and hopefully sooner... he should forgive you. I got pregnant when I was 22 with my first son and I wasn't married. Just out of college and dating a guy for not too long. We ended up getting married and since have had one more baby and another on the way. We are very happy and couldn't imagine life without our children. My mom did not speak to me for months after I told her and things didn't start to get better until about 6 months into pregnancy. She was at the birth and since then has gotten over it and our relationship is fine. I would say that, yes he will get over it in time. Just give him that time and I'm sure he will be behind your decision soon enough.

Answer 5

Honey, he'll come around. It is a great shock for a father when he finally realizes his little girl is human, has sex, is growing up and no longer bases her life around him. His reactions, while scary, are fairly normal, and some of his points are good. But, not my place to judge. Give him some time, let him think about it, then sit down and try to talk rationally to him. (This my take two or three tries, but it'll happen.) Remember, you are his little girl, he will always see you that way, but let him know that you are growing up, but will always need him to be your daddy. And, I guarantee that when he sees his grandkid for the first time, you will see him the happiest you've seen him in a long time, and you will see him as you remember him from years ago, with a beautiful baby to focus his love on.

Much luck.

Long live Jambi

Answer 6

I was in this situation about 7 years ago. My dad was soooo mad at me at first and was hateful. Also said some very mean stuff to me. I, myself was a daddy's little girl since my mom wasnt around much growing up. She would come in and out when she needed my dad to help her with things and a place to stay. My dad totally changed his attidue during my pregnancy and he is a total good grandpa to my daughter. He spoils her rotten and wouldnt trade her for the world. Your dad may be upset now but trust me he will get over it in time. I promise! Good luck hun!!!

Answer 7

He's mad because you disappointed him. He wanted more for his little girl before she became a mother. Give him some time to cool off and then have a good discussion. Let him share his reasons of being mad and you share your reasons why you want to keep the baby. Hopefully, you'll both come to see each other's side of things and a grandfather will be born.

Answer 8

he'll eventually come around hopefully. he'll always see you as his little girl, but you're out of college, you're not a kid anymore. you have to learn to make your own choices. and if he doesnt want to help you'll have to rely on your friends, ex boyfriend and yourself to make it through. i know what you're talking about when the only good things he said were what were ya thinking? my dad's the same way and we still don't get along easily. but your dad probably just feels like he's losing everything since your mom, his wife just died. you and your dad will get through this just give it time.

Answer 9

Put yourself in your dad's position. What you would be saying to your own daughter if she came to you with this news? Of course he's upset. Give him some time to get used to the idea. He wants you to be taken care of in the best possible way before you begin the task of caring for another human being. Just take good care of yourself, and be patient with your dad. He will come around with time.

Answer 10

He will get over it. My dad was the same way the first time I got pregnant. It is just a slap in the face to them to wake up and realize their little girls are not so little anymore. Just give him some time. Good Luck to you :)