My sister and husband have been fighting like cats and dogs and it is getting on me and my two childrens nerves. My husband is 26 and my sister is 13. I have to admit she do tend to get a b*tchy attitude from time to time. She plays around with my husband, but then when my husband plays around with her she has to yell and scream at him, talking about how he plays too much. This has me confused. And it don't even have to be that he's joking around with her. If I am at work, my children know to do their chores before they go outside or play the game. My sister would just come home drop her stuff and go right outside, my husband finds this unfair to my children that they have to clean up their mess but their aunt doesn't...so he asks her to clean up after herself, and what does she do. Tells him to leave her alone and it will get done eventually. But it's just that she has no respect for my husband. He does everything he can for her. What should I do?
2006-11-28 06:51:19 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You should sit her down and talk to her. Tell her that she needs to show respect for you and your husband, and that she needs to do her share of chores.
She may be jealous of losing you to him, so try to spend some alone time with her to let her know that you do still love her.
2006-11-28 06:54:02 · answer #1 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are raising you kid sister and as such have to set down some firm guidelines. However at the same time you and your man both have to realize that this child is only 13 and as such will act as such. I'm pretty sure that you both have already tried to talk with her and tell her how bad an example she is setting for your children, but being 13 she doesn't really care as the world does revolve around kids that age. If you have something that you can remove from her at present to help her be better at cleaning up you may want to try this also. My fiance removed the Internet and took away her daughters phone for not getting up properly for school. It was like the end of the world that this kid had to live without these things in her life. But you know what, she learned real quick that her mom meant business and that if she wanted these privileges that she had to earn them by proving she could get to school. And the funniest part is that she does get to school now every day and on time. Ha! Maybe you and your husband just need to find the right carrot to use to motivate this young girl. Best of luck to all involved.
2006-11-28 07:00:48 · answer #2 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Salutations You!
What I think you should do is call a family meeting and set some guidelines for little sis and for hubby. If she does not comply with the rules then she should receive a consequence for her actions. Say for instance she comes in and just throws her stuff down then head on out the door. Back-up! See right there, that was too far already. She should be made aware today, right this very moment that that is unacceptable. If you have to make a poster and put it up on the refrigerator, "We check in and get permission first!". Then do that stuff. You only want what's best for her and she needs to understand that she could be in situations where no-one cares what she does or who does anything to her for that matter.
Maybe your hubby plays with her too much and should consider putting the playfulness on the back burner until lil sis can show some appreciation and respect for herself and others. Let her know if she wants respect she MUST be willing to give it in return. Sometimes playfulness can be misconstrued and thought of as a crush or things of that sort. Yes even at that age, so please be careful and I wish you the best. Thank you for allowing me to share a little of my knowledge with you, I hope that it is helpful to you.
Luv2luvu XOXO!
2006-11-28 07:06:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are your children? Your sister is still a child, even if she is the "Aunt". For her to be living with you and your husband, there must be a problem or reason why. I think she might just be trying to fit in when she jokes with your husband and he should take it a little easier on her and so should you. Try to treat all of the children in the home the same when you're setting up your rules. Just remember they are all children, she's only 13...which is a hard age for a young girl.
2006-11-28 06:56:51 · answer #4 · answered by Kimber 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her and find out why she feels she can speak to him in that manner.My experience with girls is usually they act like this because some how your husband has put himself on her level.Check out the entire picture,not just what your husband is saying,but the whole picture and listen to what your sister is really saying.
2006-11-28 06:58:17 · answer #5 · answered by punkin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, i don't know if you played that game , but there was this episode in full house, when kimmy and stephanie had to play this game that dj sayed that you would have to spread away from each other, and so they had to ask a question that sayed like what is your favorite food, and then one has to answer and then then if it is similar then they move up once. and finallly in the end, they will realize that "hey", this is dumb! and they will get back together. see it if worked. it worked for stephanie and kimmy.
2006-11-28 07:00:00 · answer #6 · answered by sally b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as a teen i know i get mad for the sliet's things but u need to tell her she still needs to respect her elders and u should ask her whats her problem with him maybe it's not even him maybe there something wrong at school or friends and the first person the get on her bad side is the first to go
~chelsia
2006-11-28 06:58:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is 13....not 21. Put your foot down and draw the line with her. As for your husband, he shouldn't be 'playing' with her. It only leads to crossed signals. Simple solution: Tell him to ignore her if she is gonna be this way.
2006-11-28 06:54:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well he open the door for her. in the sence that she wont take him seriously no more since he plays with her.. so my advice for you would be to tell your husband to leave her alone and when she wants to play with him to tell her to back of and not to mess around with him. so that way she knows her boundaries from now on.
2006-11-28 06:54:47 · answer #9 · answered by wsmoreno 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your adult husband has no reason to be arguing with a 13 year old.
Is he immature? Why would he even bother to stoop to a child's level?
Tell him to leave her alone.
2006-11-28 06:53:03 · answer #10 · answered by alwaysbombed 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋