Boyfriends / Husbands like our Fathers? =====================================?

Question

Is it true that us girls subconsciously try to find a guy who's like our dad?

I think it has something to do with the Electra Complex, the female version of the Oedipus Complex.

I can't help but notice that my boyfriend of 9 1/2 months reminds me of my dad.
They both like cracking jokes, which leads me to be sensitive towards them. And they are both sarcastic.
They both are good political debaters.
They both know the Bible very well and can give great speeches and lessons based on the Bible.
They look kinda similar-ish??
Oh, and they both love Shakira. LOL.

I know there are other things. I just can't think of anymore at the moment. These are just some I've noticed.

Does anyone else think we try to find a guy like our dad?
Does anyone else find that their significant other is like their dad too?

My father is a GREAT father. : }

And I never intended on getting someone similar to my father either. Hehe.

Answer 1

There are two basic trends; one is to find a guy who's just like your dad, the other is to find one who is exactly opposite. The former is just fine if you have a good relationship with your dad, while the latter is better if your father is an abusive jerk.

Men have a similar pattern in regard to their mothers, btw.

Answer 2

Do you like your dad as a person? I've heard of this before and find myself doing the same thing now that I'm out of my 'badboy phase'. You could always try to look at how they are different if it's creeping you out.

Other than that, enjoy that they get along, it makes things easier, and if your dad is a good man, well the fact that you are looking for someone similar isn't a shocker, but the fact that they groove together in the living room to Shakira may be. =/

Answer 3

I have only be in love twice in my life.

The first was in college. He was the spitting image of my father. They were both shorter and chubby, same color hair. They enjoyed the same hobbies, music, everything. The only difference: my guy was a mama's boy.

The second is now my husband. He doesn't look like my father but they are very, very similar. They enjoy the same things (fishing, hunting, things with motors, home-repairs). They even have the same temperament.

I definately didn't go looking for a man just like my father but I am glad I found him. My sister however has been married twice and both were absolutely nothing like our father. But I am more of a daddy's girl that she is.

Answer 4

i can tell u that my wife tells that I am exactly like her father.
she tells me that we are both initially reserved & then start talking a lot when we have studied the other person, we are very observant & think what we speak, we are both intelligent,
we both have a bit of a short temper (though I don't have a big short temper), etc..

Hence, yeah, I do think that for many woman they subconsciously look for someone similar to their father/brother.

however, i don't think the opposite holds true, a man looking for someone like their mother- that is rare.

Answer 5

I know I'm not answerin ur question but I heard ur great advice from "nitenite91" I was wondering if u could go to my question which is "Is this consider a 2nd chance my story is long i hope u dont get bored?" and read my story and hopefully i could get some advice too please.