My grand daughter was living with me with the promise to contribute money to help us both. She was behind about $1000.00 not helping for a half year. When things needed repair that was my bill too.
She was away spending time with some friends when the hot water heater in that part of the home messed up and damage was a result. It was not discovered right away. When she learned of this She knew I didn*t have the money to take care of the immediate costs not covered by my insurance. She heard me say that I needed to hurry to bank to see if I could qualify for a 1,000.00 loan and she said the lawsuit that I had won for her several years ago now was making it possible for her to LOAN me the $1000.00. In my disparation, I agreed... than I got to thinking; why couldnt she let it go. We talked about it and she seem to be disappointed with me. I am still storing her things also in my home. Am I wrong? She is getting married next MOnday.Comments on new things inhome.bugging her?
2006-11-28 01:59:03 · 8 answers · asked by carole 5 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
From an ethical standpoint, I think you should pay her back. She made it clear that it was a loan, and you agreed to it. Even if you were desperate, you accepted the deal. I also believe, however, that ethically she should forgive some portion of the debt because she was behind in what she was supposed to be paying you.
From a legal standpoint, there are two factors to forming a contract: offer and acceptance. Your granddaughter offered you a loan of a thousand dollars, and you accepted it. There was consideration (something of value was exchanged) - you got the money to fix the water heater, and she got a promise of repayment.
I take from your question that you don't want to pursue legal action against your granddaughter, for which you are to be commended. In order to salvage your relationship with her, I think you should repay her, tell her that this is the only wedding gift you can afford is repaying the debt, and LET IT GO.
2006-11-28 02:41:12 · answer #1 · answered by Vicki D 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is not un-typical of youngsters just starting out. First of all, your grand daughter is starting to question why she should invest in your property. After all, you are her relative, therefore she's entitled to a free ride.
She is now finding out the real cost of living, and for her it ain't pretty. You and I know best, how much of a struggle it is to get started. It's even worse today, because these people today really believe they can't live without their I-pods, cell phones, cable TV, plasma TV, overseas vacation, etc.
You have two potential problems with this young lady, that I can see. 1) She is suffering from sticker shock with her awareness of what it costs today to start a new life. 2) This young lady hasn't developed a healthy value system as to what and who is important to her. To kick grandma to the curb, is hardly the ideal family value criteria we look for in our grand children. Maybe your own child didn't do the best job in seeing that his or her daughter developed strong character, or this wouldn't be happening.
On the other hand, are you being completely fair to your grand daughter? do you really need her help? Or, are you doing a little scammin on your own? These are the questions you need to ask yourself, and with a little soul searching, I'm confident you will find the right answer!
2006-11-28 02:47:03 · answer #2 · answered by briang731/ bvincent 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very tricky... but if you took the money frm her on the premise that it was a loan, then yes pay it back - you entered into a verbal agreement and in all rights should hold up your end. I know in your mind it is not right since she did owe you some money but that is a different incedent that should be expressed seperatly. Just because someone does something wrong does not mean that you should follow up and do something wrong back - be the bigger person and do her how you feel you should be done.
Just my oppinion. Good luck!
2006-11-28 03:53:39 · answer #3 · answered by typewithnospaces 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would figure out how much she owes you for back rent, utilities, storage, etc and present her with a bill along with your $1000 repayment. I think that will get the idea across to her. You BOTH made agreements to repay the other and NEITHER of you should get away with not paying.
2006-11-28 02:43:03 · answer #4 · answered by Goose&Tonic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you argreed to pay it back, then yes you should. She could take you to small claims.
If you never spoke to her about charging her for storage or anything else, you're out of luck trying to use that to offset the 1000.
If she agreed to help you with expenses - then I would speak with her about offsetting the amount. But resorting to "self-help" is wrong.
You should pay her back and then take her to small claims if you wanted.
2006-11-28 02:10:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
$1000 seems like a lot now but youll soon realize its really a pittance, id say let it go, after all you own the home and repairs are really to your benefit, AND you did agree to it...there are more important things, it sounds like you and your grandaughter have a decent relationship, shes still struggling to establish herself, ...just my opinion, but i certainly wouldnt teach her its ok to renege on a deal
2006-11-28 02:09:33 · answer #6 · answered by goldmember1956 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
State your case--She's not looking through your eyes!
2006-11-28 02:08:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over it!
2006-11-28 02:08:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋