me to help out when he has to work late.. I have no problem, He is my boyfriend and I love him, But we don't live together and Now he is telling me I am going to fast. I have been just going along with what he has given me. He says we are on two different places... so what the heck is he doing w/ my staying over asking for help? I feel numb now like he put the brakes on and that is not really what I want... I feel like I am sacraficing everything, when he is telling me to slow down I am sabatoging our future... What should I do?
2006-11-28 01:06:15 · 14 answers · asked by Teresa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would have a conversation with him and ask him what he expects of you. And I would not be available to babysit every time he is asking if this is the only time he wants you to interact with the children, when he needs you. The two of you need to sit down and have a heart to heart about this. Good luck and God bless****
2006-11-28 01:08:53 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never be silly enough to "sacrifice everything" in a relationship. Always remember that if you give everything of yourself, you will have nothing left for you when it ends.
I agree with the others; this is about having a built in babysitter, not a "girlfriend or fiance". Know and understand that you are worth more than that. Don't get caught up making up excuses for him in your mind and heart. It is what it is. Get out now before you get too attached to the children.
2006-11-28 09:30:26 · answer #2 · answered by Charlotte C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he has been using you for free maid and babysitter services... if you don't want to get hurt more, step backwards and maybe give him some time... I don't know, but it sounds like he is not ready to commit just yet... maybe there are still a few fish in the sea he hasn't gotten on the hook just yet. Don't sacrifice your needs any more... take some time out just for you and don't be too available when he wants you to "fill in" on his list of duties at home! There is an old saying that says, "If you love something/ someone... let them go... if they come back to you, it was meant to be, but if not, they were never yours" Let him go, and see how long it takes ok! You are not his floor mat to be walked on and if he loved you and was comitted to you, he wouldn't be treating you like that. If I were you, I'd go on a solo vacation and see what happens later! Get "out of Dodge" girl!
2006-11-28 09:16:09 · answer #3 · answered by MaggieO 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him good luck in finding a sitter for his kids cause he's going to need one. Put the brakes on that faster than he put the brakes on telling you to slow down. Better yet, find yourself another b/f that isn't a user.
2006-11-28 09:43:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have run into the emtionally wall and he may be scared. May sound crazy but just tell him how you feel, calmly and rationally. Point out that you had followed his cues and ask what the new boundries are. If you can live with them fine, if not you may have to think this relationship.
2006-11-28 09:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by dmjrev 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say "tell him", however some men are gun shy when it comes to committment. He sounds like one of them. He shouldn't be asking you to help raise his kids (which he is essentially doing), if he isn't willing to go to the next step. I guess tell him, you'll be miserable if you don't.
2006-11-28 09:08:58 · answer #6 · answered by Jessie P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is just useing you to help care for his children. I would tell him to hire a sitter and see how your relationship goes from there.
2006-11-28 09:16:26 · answer #7 · answered by L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he just wants a mom for his kids and less to do with a relationship. a "girlfriend" is an inexpensive built-in babysitter.
2006-11-28 09:08:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell hime to go to hell that the kids isnt yours and that your not their mother. Hes just looking for a partner to take care of his kids and thats it.
2006-11-28 09:08:34 · answer #9 · answered by missprissyky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like to me that your boyfriend is only after a babysitter for his children. get out before you get hurt any further.
2006-11-28 09:10:24 · answer #10 · answered by LEEANE G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋