My girk\l friend who I love has a cancer in her uterus,She will not bring more childrens to me in the future if i married her,I will leave my country to live with her in her country,I can sacrify by any thing for her,BUT this point is very critical,What will I do after many years when I feel I need a baby?she did not agree about marrying another girl in the future to bring me babies,I am confuesed,I need to solve this condition,Continue with her the relation or not,She will make a surgery to removed the cancerous part in her genital system,What I am going to do ? I need a babies in the future and I need her also at the same time?
2006-11-27 23:44:50 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That's a tough situation for you both. I can imagine your girlfriend is pretty devestated too. Don't forget to consider her in all this. I'm sure she wanted children too, just as much as you do, and to find out she cannot is a terrible shock for any woman, as well as the fact that she has cancer, which is also awful.
Be sensitive here. If you love this girl, you need to decide what is more important - a life with her, or children of your own. If you want a life with her, adoption or surrogacy may be an option for you both. Otherwise, you have to end the relationship and find a woman who can bear you children. A lot of couples don't find out they are infertile until after they are married, and it can destroy a relationship. If yours is strong, maybe you can get through this.
The way you talk, though, it sounds to me like you have already made up your mind.
2006-11-27 23:50:01 · answer #1 · answered by helly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love this woman so much that you are willing to leave your country for her, then what is the problem? There is always adoption, or maybe the doctors can pull some of her eggs out before the surgery and fertilize with your sperm and then just use a serogate mother. There are all sorts of ways these days to have children. And there are also all sorts of children in need of loving families. Don't throw her away because you feel she is no good now. Your not with her just for children are you?
2006-11-27 23:50:15 · answer #2 · answered by Snowflake25 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would really hope this tramatic situation that she has to go through doesn't prevent you guys from adopting, rather then you wanting to be with someone else justo have kids. I mean don't you think that she is going through a lot of pain right now, especially if she knows the way you feel about having kids. You really must put her thoughts in perspective also along with yours. If you love this women you two will compermise and find away, like adopting in the future, to have the childeren you want. Good Luck!
2006-11-28 00:00:40 · answer #3 · answered by A.K.A NK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's already married to you, I would suggest you to adopt the baby and grew together.
However, she is still holding the title 'gf' and not as a wife, so I would suggest you break up with her and find someone else. A person should not be selfish of holding him back since she already knew she can't bore any children for you. You may be angry with me or even said I'm heartless woman but I mean good to you.
Even you said you would take care of her for lifetime, but would you be happy & will you ever NOT be regreted with your decision? Be honest with yourself and listen to your heart. OK, if you said you don't mind, are you able to convince yourself in the next couple of years till more problems and loneliness catching up in between you and her?
I do sympathy with your gf, however, this is perhaps her fate and nobody could ever change the destiny. You still have other option to choose - lead happier marriage life with healthier wife..
2006-11-28 01:45:26 · answer #4 · answered by Adorable Mrs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am newly married, and see zero reasons for bringing a kid into this world. Too much worrying, stress, takes a lot of effort which I don't have, and takes a lot of free time away. Don't assume you'll want a kid, it's way more responsibility than you think. And what makes someone "feel" the need to have a baby?
2006-11-28 00:57:20 · answer #5 · answered by godzillasagoodman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Adopt. There are so many babies and children needing the affection and protection of a family.
2006-11-27 23:51:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're Muslim .. why do you have a girlfriend in the first place?
Anyway, I myself, being a Muslimah, know that every Muslim man does want children. You should support her and help her through the emotional pain she is/will be experiencing. But think deeply - if you do really want biological children .. then tell her exactly what you feel and what she propose you do?
nemo
2006-11-28 00:03:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her, then support her in all she has and needs to do..... NO MATTER WHAT IT IS.... Adoption is always an option.... If you have to have a child that has to have you DNA, then look into a Sergeant Mother.... There are ways to over come any obstacle when it comes to love...... The easiest route usually turns out to be the hardest route to take....
2006-11-27 23:51:54 · answer #8 · answered by Ray8l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparently your need for children outweighs your desire to help her.
Hate to let you in on this news big guy but the survival rates for this are not very good.
Go be with this woman who needs your love and support now more than you need to worry about children.
You need to worry about her immediate health right now. If you are meant to have children, whatever god you subscribe to will see that it is done.
2006-11-27 23:51:24 · answer #9 · answered by Flagger 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I imagine in your culture having your own flesh and blood children is on the top of the list of important things. You might love her all you want but if she can't give you the one thing that you really need than break up with her.
2006-11-28 00:48:39 · answer #10 · answered by Stand 4 somthing Please! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋