just because im a guy doesnt mean i like girls ......i gave them no reason to think that i'd b interested in girls, yet they go on and on about me having a gf.....im not out but do people really need to assume that i like girls?? ur thoughts on this matter pls :)
2006-11-27 23:35:56 · 21 answers · asked by sexyashell 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I'm straight and used to really hate that question too, People always look at you like your a loser if the answer was no
2006-11-27 23:41:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yes this is called 'Hetero-sexism' it is based on the age old societal belief that everybody in the world is Heterosexual - men being sexually attracted to women and vis versa. I have no problem telling people that my life partner is not a women but rather a man just like me! I even go as far as to tell them that they shouldn't be doing what they are doing - assuming that because I am male that my partner is female. I have actually put my boyfriend on the phone when some telemarketer has called asking to speak to my wife or the lady of the house! Because there is no lady in my house nor do I have a wife per say I put my b/f on the phone and man is that telemarketer ever shocked when he/she is talking to another man when he/she was expecting to hear the voice of a women come on the phone! I try to stay gender neutral when talking to people, so instead of asking a man if he has a wife or instead of asking a women if she has a husband I will use the word spouse which could be a husband or wife! Or I will say 'life partner' or 'significant other'. If I am talking about myself and it is somebody I don't necessarily want to know I am in a same sex relationship then I might use the word partner only that way most people right away think I am talking about a business partner for instance. Hope this is helpful.
*hugs* JAC<
2006-11-28 09:51:13 · answer #2 · answered by jackaboo007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is merely an effort to make conversation, albeit an intrusive, personal one that really is none of their business. They assume or ask because according to the most biased of statistics, the old 10% are gay stat, there is a 90% chance you DO like girls. I'd take a bet on those odd!
Hey, they don't ask me if I have a gf just because I am married!
2006-11-28 08:46:38 · answer #3 · answered by kingstubborn 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that it's human nature for people to ask these kind of questions. These are people that do not know how to live outside of the box. I think it's more appropriate to ask if you have a "significant other" or "partner". This way you are not offending anyone and it's not gender driven. I'm straight but I have several friends that are gay and I can appreciate how you might get upset by this.
2006-11-28 07:44:02 · answer #4 · answered by Dragoness 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I never ask people that. Like if I'm having a casual conversation with a co-worker, neighbor or someone I wait for them to tell me. I figure if they want me to know they'll share but I'm not going to ask. It's personal and not anyone's business. I'm married but when I was single I hated people asking me if I had a boyfriend. I never make assumptions about a person's sexual orientation. That's why I don't ask about their personal relationships.
2006-11-28 20:42:10 · answer #5 · answered by DawnDavenport 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you are asked ANY question that you don't like or just don't want to answer, look them in the eye, smile and ask why they want to know. A more politically correct way to ask this (IF there is a need to know or just curiosity) might be "Are you dating anyone?" I personally don't ask these types of questions. If I'm talking to someone and they want me to know if they have a bf, gf, spouse, whatever, they will find a way to work it into the conversation.
2006-11-28 08:27:00 · answer #6 · answered by poppywest1223 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, My wife let me have a boyfriend but every once in a while she ask me if I have a girl too. The only reason for me having a boyfriend is because my wife can't provide in the bed like a men but she can as a woman. So there is no need for me to have a girlfriend
2006-11-28 08:02:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I don't mind, I tell them straight up that I have someone I have been with going on 7 years. I do feel it is a personal question, unfortunately for them I also have no problem telling them that HE and I are doing just fine. If they don't want an answer they might not like, they should keep their questions to themselves.
2006-11-28 08:00:37 · answer #8 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh me too! Please, I always look like a loser cause I have to say no every time, even when I am happily involved with a guy. It's even worse when co-workers find out you are dating someone. I always use gender neutral terms, but sometimes they just go on she this and girlfriend that. People just assume everyone's straight.
2006-11-28 08:42:48 · answer #9 · answered by Wanderer 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its going to get worse over the holidays. Relatives especially are obnoxious about this.
If you are out and comfortable with yourself, then simply correct them. "Yes I have a boyfriend" "No, I don't have a boyfriend right now". If not, simply ignore them or ask them why they would ask you such a personal question and walk away. That is advice from Dear Abby or Ann Landers and I've found it to work well. It disarms the asker and makes them think they have done something wrong. That gives you time to leave the area.
2006-11-28 07:49:06 · answer #10 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋