about 7 years ago i began a pen pal relationship with an idian man and i am an american well about a year after we had been talking he flu over to america to see me we hung out and talked and it was almost 4 years pasted before i heard from him again and this was just last mounth. So we have been talking and i cant seem to get him off my mind he makes me happy but i know in my heart that with him being indian and me being american it wouldnt work or would it what do you think. I mean he is a well know man in indian a lawyer in fact and he has stolen my heart and it hurts because we cant be togeather because we live two diffrent lives and he has totally diffrent belifes then i do. I dont think his parents would like him to be with an american girl could someone in india help me on how people feel about american girls with indian men??? thanks for your time
2006-11-27 16:27:27 · 15 answers · asked by April A 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I'm from India! Yes, Indians are conserved, I'm surprised he had a penpal relationship with someone. I think this shows that he is open to other cultures, you CAN have a long distance relationship. People judge others in India by their "cast", their clique...well so while he says he is "Respected" he might not be, he might just be of a well-respected clique. Anyways, you can give this a try and remember this will be a fidelity test for both you and him! Trust me, it might be hard for his parents, but once they get to know you, it wont be TOO bad...and they might even consider the marriage! Good Luck~
2006-11-27 16:31:36 · answer #1 · answered by HAPPY <3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Inter-racial dating are common everywhere, including India. Just take a quick glance at the large Indian community in US.. in case u dint know...its full of inter-racial friendships, dating and marriages of all types. World is really quite small these days thanks to globalization.
As long as u both click and hv strong feelings.. the colors, distances and life styles dont really matter..My experience, opposites attract more... I suppose u hv known the guy quite long.. so u both probably know a lot about each other and are comfortable..though the gaps in between ur meetings indicate caution and review from u, as to what this relation actually is? It can b just a crush..some curiousity or a little long distance fling.. If its more than all this? then its important how much u both understand each other.. and how deep r the feelings..what the parents think or society thinks.. well if i were u.. I'd chose love rather than worrying about the world.. They all can never b happy anyway :).. List down what concerns u have.. then perhaps also hv a chat with the guy...talk it to have more clarity...it will also give u some answers u want to get from him.......Best of luck !
2006-11-28 01:04:26 · answer #2 · answered by Circles S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The biggest issue is which child is he in his family- First and Second sons are often expected to marry a girl the parents choose- younger males in the family can marry anyone they wish. He has probably told his family about you so that hard part is done.
Concerns- children and child upbringing are tops- you will have very different views on raising kids and religions. Consider his religion and if you would want to convert or at least become fluent in his customs. This is something you both need to discuss seriously before going further. Work out plans goals etc now and make sure you both truly agree and yes it can work very well. Inidan girls are a 50-50 reaction but if you show respect and knowledge of their lifestyles and culture you can win a thousand hearts over there.
2006-11-28 00:33:09 · answer #3 · answered by Answerkeeper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The relationship picture drawn by you with Indian man is no doubt a problem. I have seen married couples, girls American and husband Indian, and they are living very happily and enjoying life pleasure. You are an American girl. It is OK. But you will have to adjust yourself according to the requirement of Indian environment. You will live and co operate with Indian atmosphere and social living. It also depends upon your Indian friend. If he satisfies his family than there is no problem. You will live just like normal wife and normal husband. I want to make it clear that you must have to cut your relationship requirements to suit the atmosphere of indian people otherwise you will not be accepted. if you do not have flexibility, you will have to curt a sorry figure as indian social environment is very staunch and inflexible.
2006-11-28 00:40:22 · answer #4 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love has no boundaries or limits. It should be a mutual one only. If he really loves you, you can ask him to marry you. Many Indian boys have married American girls and vice versa. Only true love and mutual respect should be the foundation of your marriage.
True, your and Indian cultures are different, but, I think it will not be a hindrance in your married life. As I have said, it is only mutual understanding of each other, that is essential for a marriage to succeed.
Wish you all the luck in the world. Talk to him immediately and know his opinion.
2006-11-28 00:34:49 · answer #5 · answered by Electric 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the world is shrinking and people accept other cultures more easily than earlier. we have a American in our family, and we accepted because she is good natured and kind woman. I think, you should talk to him and if possible visit him in India to meet his parents see how things work out. Not all Indian's are Conservative.
2006-11-28 00:37:19 · answer #6 · answered by Sanjeev A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both loved each other enough, it wouldn't matter what anyone else thought (even his parents). As for everything else, when you love someone, you learn to make sacrifices. That's just something to think about.
All kinds of people marry each other. You learn to adapt. You learn to respect each others beliefs, you live you lives together-things may change, but that's where sacrificing comes in if he comes here. Is he willing to quit his practice and start up here? If you love each other, you can make sacrifices, anything is possible...if not, it wasn't meant to be...good luck.
2006-11-28 00:38:11 · answer #7 · answered by Jenna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him how u feel my boyfriend is from asia and we have totaly different belifes but once i told him how i feel he told me he felt the same and guess he come here cuple of years ago and we have been dating for almost three yrs. so i was happe told him and if he whants to be friends thats okay but dont le him stop living your life it took me lot of guys to find the rith one but mr.right could be a day away so dont put all your love into one men trust some one who has gone throuh this cring in bed day after day you will meet the guy who feels the same why you feel for him if i can find true love so will you belive it
2006-11-28 00:39:45 · answer #8 · answered by nami 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl....take a chance. I was in a situation like yours a while back and it ended as soon as it started. Maybe he feel the same way about you...have you asked him. If not find out and go from there.
2006-11-28 00:32:39 · answer #9 · answered by JOELLEMICHELLE 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
now world is global a village, we share almost same values, if same one can come to meet you in US, he can do any thing, his family must be broadminded and there will not be any problem if you settle in India or he comes to you.
You just tell him.
2006-11-28 00:34:34 · answer #10 · answered by vinisha v 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋