difference when marrying a 23 year old girl in 30 year od woman?

Question

I am 23 year old but my boyfirend is 56 year old, he said that if i was only 30 plus of age surely he will marry me. i don't know what's the difference if am 30 plus year old or 23 year old

Answer 1

He is trying to tell you that you are too young for him, and the age difference will interfere with your marriage in later years.
I am 58 and I would not even think about marrying a lady under the age of 40.
You did not mention if he had any kids of your age or older. I am sure there are several reasons that he knows better to marry someone of your age, and really I do not think that you would want to marry someone of that age either.
You may think that you love him, but do you love him for his money?
Good Luck

Answer 2

First let me ask you this, why would you want to marry a 56 year old man? The difference is decades and alot of life experiences. Listen you are young, very young and this 56 year old man needs to be a man and leave you alone and the fact that he won't marry you because you are only 23 speaks volumes!!!! Get out of this relationship and try to find someone closer to you own age, 5 or 6 years maybe wouldn't be so bad, but you are talking 33 year age difference.

Answer 3

Sounds like he is using an excuse. He is telling you things would be different based on something you can not possibly change. That is mean and inconsiderate. I think he is using you. Why on earth would he tell you this, you can't change your age and if this is the real reason he isn't marrying you then he is petty. Throwing things in your face that are beyond your control.

Your age difference will eventually become a problem after all when you are 35 he will be 68, he will be retired and you will still be no where near that phase in your life Would he want to be alone all that time knowing by the time you are ready to retire he will be 88! Do you want children? Is it really reasonable to expect him to want children at his age?

Perhaps it's time to move on. He obviously isn't going to make a commitment and that in itself is bothering you enough to post the question. And if you were perfectly comfortable in the relationship you wouldn't be here searching for validation from others now would you? If he doesn't see a permanent future with you and that is what you desire then that will cause resentment to creep in even if you don't mean to let it.

If however your just willing to deal with the here and now without getting hurt then you could continue the relationship. Knowing it's just a short term thing enjoy it while it lasts and move on.

I usually don't have a big thing about age difference, but in this case it seems really extreme. For goodness sake he could very well be much older than your father.

Answer 4

I read an article a year or so ago about decision making see link below. The human brain doesn't fully develop decsion making skills until an average of 25. Being an average some individuals develop the skill sooner and other longer. You either have it when your 30 or never at all.

In my mind, I always encourage young adults to wait to get married. Just consider the fact that you may not fully know and understand yourself. I'm all for going against the grain and not going along with the crowd but why are you dating someone much more than twice your age? If it lasts until you're 30, then by all means get married and good luck!!!

Answer 5

It's because of the age of your brain.

I am 36 and I'm not sure I'd want to do anything with a 23-year old girl except have lots of sex. i'm not sure what else we'd talk about.

A 36 year old very rarely listens to the radio anymore, has no idea what music is popular. A 36-year old is interested in news and talk radio and money. They now get nauseous on roller-coasters even though they still love them and they are starting to be disgusted by their own body. They don't really enjoy drinking alcohol just for fun and they don't really enjoy scary movies anymore. Things 23 year old girls find fascinating and interesting a 36 year old boy finds senseless and irritating.

My guess is a 56 year old is the same way but worse.

He enjoys your company but he's not totally certain he has anything in common with you. He's scared and trying to sabotoge the relationship so you'll break up with him now rather than when you're 37 and still hot and he's a very ancient 70

Answer 6

The only REAL difference between 23 and 30 is 7 years. Firstly, I think he is worried what others will say if he was to marry you at only 23 years of age - there's a social stigma attached to it. Secondly, he probably feels that 30-year-olds are a lot more mature than 23-year-olds (may or may not be true, depending on the individual). If you feel strongly against his decision, you should let him know. Otherwise, respect his decision and just move on.

Answer 7

Good grief. You actually have a relationship with a 56-year old man? Break this off imediately for your own good and to keep grandpa from having a coronary.

What is the attraction? I simply do not understand how an intelligent woman can get into...

Oh...never mind.

Answer 8

You ever heard that age ain't nothing but a number you are 23 years and it legal if he married you, if you are old enough to date him do other things with him like you know sex than he dame well should marrie you regarding of you age he should have through of that when he started to date you and make you his girl.

Answer 9

no way kid. have fun, let him buy you stuff, get treated like a lady, but don't marry the guy because you'll end up changing his diaper in 10 years and he wouldn't want that anymore than you would.

Answer 10

7 years!!! He should be looking for an older woman. He will be winding down soon and probably is thinking about that. You are still a baby. look for a young man...live...he has!!!