Women Only Please!!?

Question

I want to hear from any women who have had miscarriages. I had one when I was 7 weeks pregnant. This has been over 10 months ago and I was wondering if the pain will ever lessen. I dont know if it is normal for me to still cry about losing my baby, or if I am just being overly sensitive. I guess I want to hear about personal experiences in regards to how long before you stopped crying constantly. Also, I do not have any other kids. Please no smart @$$ comments, this is a serious question. Thank you so much for any answers.

Answer 1

Hi. I had a miscarriage 2 years ago when i was 9 wks and i dont cry constantly but i still cry from time to time when i think about. Its been two years and i always think to myself, my child will be two if he/she was here. Its like, the thought is still fresh in my mind. I try and picture how my baby would have looked and what features he/she would have of mine. I know i was only 9 wks., but i went out and bought 2 unisex outfits. I was so excited. I still have them in my closet and everytime i look at them i begin to cry. My mom suggests im just hurting myself by keeping the outfits in sight. But i told her even without them being in sight, there will still be something there to remind me of my baby. A commercial, seeing another newborn, or even just going to the department store and seeing couples with newborns. One day, when i was in my room, i caught a scent of baby powder. I broke down crying because i knew it was just my baby saying hi mommy. It hurt me so bad.........I know exactly what you're going through. But keep this in mind sweetie, our babies are in a better place. They are sweet little angels in heaven playing pat-a-cake together! Keep strong. I feel your pain.

Answer 2

I have a 5 year old daughter and have had 3 miscarriages all within one year. The pain is horrible and I think if I didn't have my girl it would only be worse. Do you have anyone to talk to? It's hard when everyone seems to move on without you, and you're left to hurt alone. I hope you don't give up on becoming a mother, your sensitive heart would blossom if you had a child. You might never know why it happened, but hang onto the love you felt. If this is something that is affecting your day to day life seek a support group or call your mom. Hang in there, I know it hurts, I still have very bad times dealing with my losses. But after the last one I swore I would never try again. Now I feel that longing in my heart again and I think I might just one more time! Good luck, and try to be thankful that you got to feel that powerful love even for just a little while. ( I know that's kind of weak, but I was grateful that my babies were with me at all; 6 weeks, 6 weeks, and 10 weeks)

Answer 3

I had a miscarriage 3 years ago. It started with a tubal pregnancy that was very painful, my doctor told me I was lucky to miscarry instead of have surgerory. I hated her for that I don't know who could feel lucky after losing a baby. I got pregnant again 4 months later, and had a wonderful baby boy, but there are times even now that I still think about it and cry. I don't believe that you can be overly sensitive about losing a baby, I takes alot of time to sort out your own feelings and be ok with it, but it will happen. You have every right to still cry and even years from now look back and cry when you remember that a person with so much feeling and love will be a great mother one day.I hope this helps you.

Answer 4

You'll never get over it completely. You need to think about why you are sad though:

Is it because you are guilty that a life that you were trying to bring into the world was lost?

Do you feel as though it was your fault that you had the miscarriage?

Have you been dreaming of having children for a long time, and are frustrated that you failed?

You need to realize that nothing could have prevented this, and it isn't your fault. Keep in mind also that at 7 weeks, the baby still did not have sensory perception or brain activity, so from a medical perspective it wasn't a person yet - so you don't need to feel guilty about the death.

I suggest that you keep trying to get pregnant....that's the only thing that will really help you to get over this. I feel for you, though.

Answer 5

I've had two at about 6 weeks and was able to move on withing a month or so. I understand that 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. However on the 9th of November I lost an 18 week pregnancy. The heartbeat wasn't detected and I was induced for a still-birth.

I don't think I will ever EVER get over this. I suggest you grieve as much as you need. It is terrible to loose a child that has been growing inside of you.

Answer 6

I'm 27-years-old and to date, I've had about 5 miscarriages, two this year alone. Both the physical and the mental pain go away, but that doesn't mean it can't still sting a little. But the older you get, and the more you crave children, it does hurt. I had a miscarriage two months ago and when it happened I cried for 12 hours straight. I laid in my boyfriend's lap and finally feel asleep. However, after almost a year, it's time for you to live your life. Do something you've always wanted to do but thought to yourself you couldn't do with a child. God has a plan for you, and right now, it doesn't include a child.

Answer 7

Ok...I've had 3...well, one tubal pregnancy and 2 miscarriages, but I also have 2 beautiful children and I'm 16 weeks with #3. You will get over it. Once you get pg again and have that baby in your arms, that miscarriage will be a distant memory. Just remember that that miscarriage was for a reason. Most likely the fetus had too many defects to survive outside the womb.

After 10 months, it's time to start moving on and if you haven't by now then you might need to seek professional help. You're most likely in a depression and might need help getting out of it. Best of luck to you and I hope that one day soon, you'll be pregnant again and give birth to a healthy baby!!

Answer 8

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. 1 in 6 pregnancy end in miscarriage, usually in the first 12 weeks. Its very common to feel sad about the loss, even in years to come you will think about the baby you lost, you need to find a way that suits you to deal with your grief.

My personal experience, I found out I lost my first baby when I was 18 weeks, I was at my routine ultrasound when they found no heartbeat and the baby was only at 13 weeks in size. I was devastated as I fought everyone I knew to keep the baby, Everyone told me to abort. I fell pregnant soon after and didn't want to bond with my son because I lost my daughter to have him. It has been 4 years and I have baby number 3 on the way so this is my 4th pregnancy, but I still think and grieve over my first baby every day. I found a guardian angle that sits on my bed a token of the baby I lost, so every time I look at it I think of that baby and wish I was able to meet her but it just wasn't meant to be. I have been to a councilor to help me deal with it and it has helped as I don't cry anymore I do some days but not all the time.

I hope you find something that works for you. I wish you all the very best.

Answer 9

Honey I have had three and yes it does get better. Loosing a baby is never easy but honey just think, God has a plan for every life he puts on this earth and obviously it wasnt time for your baby to be here. I know it sounds crazy but yrs from now, you will know what I mean. I have had three very precious babies since the miscarriages and their dad and I have divorced but if it wasnt for the miscarriages I would not have them or my new hubby. I would have stopped having babies with the ONE I miscarried with. It does make you stronger and it makes you appreciate what you have later on in life. I now have had a hysterectomy and I would not go back and change a thing. Just think of it this way, your baby is with you and is probably wiping those tears when you cry. Good luck honey and I am here if you need me!!!

Answer 10

I had 4 miscarriages! I still once in a while think about them. I think about how old they would be now. especially the last one because I was one week shy of interning my second trimester when it would be more likely that I'd carry to term this one was far enough along to know the baby would have been a girl. the first miscarriage was at 6 weeks and the second at 9 weeks and the third at 10 weeks.I finally had two son's.