My husband sneaks up on me?

Question

YEARS ago,my husband snuck up on my when he got home from work,he scared the crap out of me and I thought it was pretty funny;he did it a few more times and it was stilll funny; also I turned the tables on him and scared him when I got home from work and also when just at home,"chillin".Fast forward to 5 years later,and I don't think it is funny anymore at all;he does it like, ALL the time;when he comes home from work,he sneaks up on me when I am taking a bath;cooking or cleaning;all the time, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day;it isn't funny anymore and I have gotten to the point where I am paranoid to even function,because I always feel like someone is watching me.I am never doing anything wrong,but every once in a while I will look up-and there he is hiding behind the corner.I have a sense of humour,but I feel like this has gone to far.I yell at him and tell him how pissed I am and tell him to stop doing it but he won't.Am I being a *****, or is he just being immature?

Answer 1

My wife does the same thing, but not to that extreme. Yes, it was funny the first hundred times but occasionally it gets old.I had to tell her to give it a rest and she understood. Now she hides the toilet paper from me. listen to me, sweetheart. YOU CAN"T WIN. No matter what you do.

Answer 2

He's being immature, but I understand why he does it (unless he needs a psychiatric evaluation). He's looking to be playful with you. Maybe a couple glasses of wine and a conversation about how he could be playful with you in a less aggravating way. Maybe coming up and cuddling you instead of scaring you? He might find you're more receptive to marital intimacy if he surprises you positively instead of negatively.

If he persists even after the calm discussion, then perhaps you need to leave the house for a few hours and go do something you enjoy -- visit a bookstore, take a drive, have a coffee. When you come back late, explain you had to collect your nerves away from home after being scared like that.

If he persists after that, he's being a sadist and needs psychiatric intervention or to be served with divorce papers.

Answer 3

That's not so good! He's really not respecting you if you've told him you no longer like it. He is being immature, and much more.

My husband likes to stand over my shoulder when I'm at the computer. I'm not up to anything, but he's always trying to see what I'm saying on answers or if we got a new e-mail from a certain person. It's to the point now that I am always looking over my shoulder and I'm not even doing anything wrong! So I can relate.

So the yelling at him didn't work, will he be better if you cry and become a hysterical mess?

Answer 4

I think he is being immature. If you have let him know that you dont like it already and it is even kinda making you feel weird in a way and he still doesnt stop, maybe he feels like you are playing too. Speak with him again, ask him in a serious tone to stop because it really does affect you. If that doesnt work, one of the times he sneaks up on you , pop him on the head with a frying pan.......he might stop after that.

Answer 5

I have a grandson that did the same thing to me all the time, until one day, he REALLY scared me bad. I was back in the laundry room, and when I looked up, there he was ....real close to me. I hollered like I had been shot, and made it clear to him that if he EVER did that again, I was not responsible for what I might do to him. I made a believer out of him....he's never done that again. Now , when he comes in the door, he yells for me. Tell your hubby, the next time he scares you, you are NOT responsible for what you might do to him. If he scares you, then take appropriate action! Bet he stops then!! Good Luck!

Answer 6

He is being immature. Once, hilarious. Twice, pretty funny, Three times, Kinda old but still sorta funny. Anymore than that? so NOT funny! Especially if you even feel as if at any moment he could pop out and scare the heck out of you.

You need to talk to him, tell him at first it was funny but now you feel as if at any moment he could pop out and scare you. Tell him how it makes you feel uncomfortable and ask him to please stop scaring you like that.
He should understand and apologize.

Answer 7

I know exactly what you mean. My husband used to do that sort of thing to me ( not always meaning to ) and l nearly ended up a nervous wreck. I now tell him to make some noise when he is coming up behind me and even still l get a fright sometimes. Maybe l am just a scaredy cat !! Who knows !! Speak to him and let him know that it is just not funny anymore and to grow up !!! Good luck

Answer 8

i am so sorry for laughing but it is so funny. i like SDS answer. that will fix him real good. you are just going to have to come with something that will top all of his nonsense. buy a can of mace and when he sneaks up on you spray him, and when he asks you what happened, just tell him you were worried someone would come into the house and you were about to put it away and you scared me. it was just a natural reaction.

Answer 9

Maybe you need to have a long talk with him when you are both relaxed and you are not upset and tell him just how disturbing you find his behavior and how it is affecting you. You could also tell him that it is so serious that you may have to seek therapy because it you are so tramatized...no you are not being immature...your husband is the immature one...

Answer 10

I would tell him its Not funny and If you do that again don't expect a kiss a hug or anything else for a week or so then stick to your guns He will learn real quick you mean business Tell him this just before bed .