I love my best friend...but we are not lesbians?

Question

I love being around my best friend. Both of us are divorced, straight, and have kids. We are not necessarily attracted to each other physically, but at the same time I feel the need to be with her constantly, just to hang out. I want to sit next to her and touch her arm or leg just to feel close to her. We have discussed this relationship before but then things in our lives lead us away from each other for a couple of years and now we spend time together on a regular basis. We have kissed on one occasion, but felt kind of weird. But we feel the way we feel. What to do? I feel like I really love her. I constantly think of her and want to be with her. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I think that you must truly have a beautiful relationship with your best friend and you should be very happy. It is very unfortunate that now in our society, political correctness, homophobia, and everything else dictates our behavior towards one another. I hate this. I have made several trips to Russia. Over there it is very normal to see two young ladies who happen to be best friends walk down the street together arm in arm. Their focus seems to be so intense upon one another that its almost as if they are shutting out the rest of the world. They are not lesbians. But their love and friendship for each other is so evident. I saw this over there time after time after time. And I thought that this was truly a beautiful thing to see. I think your relationship with your best friend is also very beautiful. Don't worry about what others think...OK?

Answer 2

My friend and I often joke that if she (or I) were a good looking man, that we would be the perfect couple. Or that since we're hot having any sex, that we're like an old married couple. It's natural that you would seek similar qualities in a friend that you would in a mate. Honesty, trust, sense of humor for example. So confusing your plutonic companionship for romantic love is understandable. She is your BEST friend. You've already said that you're not physically attracted to her, and that kissing her was weird, so obviously you don't have romantic feelings for eachother. What I believe you have is a great friendship and companionship that often serves as a surrogate for other romantic relationships in your life.

Answer 3

Schedule a do-nothing evening where you both stay in, maybe somewhere cold where you can build a big roaring fire and keep it completely private ... don't have any other friends, don't plan any activities, just be with each other on a rug by the fire. Get as close as you feel is appropriate and then see if you want to get closer. Watch the firelight playing on her skin, reflecting in her deep eyes. Watch yourself in her eyes. If you want to hold her, go ahead, see how closeness builds your power together. When the feelings envelop you both you'll know what to do and it won't feel weird. Good luck.

Answer 4

Talk to her about wanting to try a relationship. You don't feel this way towards other friends for a reason. Your attracted to her, if not physically then emotionally. If she consents then go for it. Each of you is just waiting for the other. Do what makes you happy, who cares who it's with, or what people say. Why would anything created by a loving creater (god, or whomever you follow) be upset over being in love. That was a emotion given to us. Society, people say it's wrong. Follow your heart!

Answer 5

Dont worry, you're not a lesbian. You just love her, but not in a couple way, its more like an affection way. I believe that is maybe because both of you guys are divorced, you feel like you need her protection and company, and that she needs yours. There's nothing wrong with that, as long as you don´t think about it as lesbian love. And maybe try to not demonstrate your love so much, because that can be misunderstood and lead to problems or you and your friend ending the friendship.

Answer 6

Contemporary research proves that over 70% of women are bisexual to one degree or another. Your feelings for your friend may grow into more intimate contact, but it sounds like your relationship is mutual, loving and kind. What more could we ask for? So talk to her as a friend. Let her know how much this connection has come to mean to you. See is she may also share your desire to be even closer. If not, accept this as a wonderful friendship. Is the answer is yes, then just let Nature take her course. :)

Answer 7

You can love someone without it being a sexual relationship.

I am sure you are both lonely, and you stated you are both divorced. We all need touch,warmth and closeness in our lives.

In a nutshell, wherever your relationship goes with your friend is no ones business except for the two of you. If it grows into something sexual and the love is still there....go for it,...take love wherever you can find it. P.S.---don't listed to any "bashers," you are entitled to live your life as you see fit.

Answer 8

First of all you are not gay, and don't even think it. You long for physical companionship is what it is because you are divorced and you miss the company of a MAN. That's understandable! Really what you need is not your friend, but you need to be dating men.
Sure you feel close to your friend, because she has been someone to lean on and talk to. That can create a kind of intimacy. It shouldn't be confused with physical intimacy though!
There is a big difference.
I think you are just longing for a marriage partner and your friend is sort of there so you are kind of trying to meet that need with your friend.

Answer 9

The real question is what does she feel about you? Everything can be different now and then but if she doesn't feel the same way about you anymore you should try to let her go. Finding someone new can be hard but try. Sooner or later, you'll be ok and so will she so hopefully this'll help you out.

Answer 10

right now men usually like lesbians for the intercourse attraction. the fantastic delusion is having intercourse with 2 chicks concurrently, and lesbians like chicks. 2 chicks are greater advantageous than one, and this is considered warm. right now men at the instant are not attracted to different men, so 2 men mutually provides to the "ick" ingredient while it includes intercourse. do not hassle, others understand you at the instant are not likely to hit on them on the grounds which you have a minimum of 0.5 a ideas, and your shoe length is Zellparis's IQ tripled. gay = lesbians AND gay dudes, nonetheless. bear in ideas~. in basic terms come out to those you recognize does not ideas. Take all of it in stride. Have them understand you are the comparable individual, you have in basic terms unveiled a sprint greater approximately your self.