MY OLDEST SON IS 11 MONTHS OLD AND IM READY FOR ANOTHER ONE, I ONLY WANT 2 KIDS, AND I WANT THEM LIKE 1 YEAR APART, MY HUSBAND SAYS NO, BUT I KNOW I CAN GET IT OUT OF HIM, BUT I DONT WANT TO TRICK HIM INTO IT, WHAT SHOULD I DO??
2006-11-27 08:04:58 · 18 answers · asked by ARMY KID 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
I think that having a baby is a big responsibility...and you already have one who isn't walking yet...you haven't even hit the stage where they start getting into things...and talking! I personally think that even though you feel you are ready now you should wait...you don't want to overwhelm youself...and go into postpardum stress...and if your husband isn't all for it...it would not be a good idea...you may be able to talk him into it one minute but when the mess hits the fan and the baby comes and you realize how much work it is to raise two of them at the same time...it can get ugly...children are a beautiful thing but our sanity as women bearing the child and raising them is worth more. Also, you don't want to deprive the first child...he/she will need your undivided attention now and once the "real" developmental stages hit...if you have a newborn in the house it could slow you down and cause more harm than good...think about it...the last say ends with you...just my opinion...best wishes :-)
2006-11-27 08:09:46 · answer #1 · answered by Khalimah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until you and your husband are in agreement! It will be better if he is tricked then he may end up resenting you and the baby. But I would have to say for me I had 5 kids of my own and 2 sets of them were 12 and 14 months apart. And the middle one was 3 years from the older set and 3 years from the younger set. I would have to say having them close together was much easier on me. I liked it better everything was over and we could get on with our lives. They potty trained together....learned new things together....less fights then the ones that are 3 years apart. But kids are expensive! And not that you will ever be ready money wise but you need to atleast be in agreement! Good luck and hope you have your desires as a family with no arguments!
2006-11-27 16:13:37 · answer #2 · answered by ChristyE 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not give your body time to rest while at the same time continue having serious discussions with your husband about it? I have an aunt and uncle that wanted 3 kids back to back, 1 yr apart just like you, and they have 2 girls that are 1 yr apart, and the girls are driving them NUTS. Give it time, and weigh the pros and cons of having another one so soon.
PS- PLEASE don't trick him and get pregnant without discussing it with him first. It'll put a dent in the relationship that will be hard to fix.
2006-11-27 16:09:08 · answer #3 · answered by rach 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hmm, it really depends on how old you are, and what you do for a living. Maybe you should get to know you other son better before you bring someone else into the picture? For example, perhaps you'd like to go through those terrible twos first, to figure out if you really want to go through that twice?
Don't trick you husband, it would only lead to bad things.
2006-11-27 16:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by equinebeing 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know you want them quick, but to my understanding its actually healthier if you wait at least two years (gives your body time to repair all the damage from the first one). It can also get kind of expensive later when they are both ready to go to college and you've only got a year between them, two college tuitions can be expensive. Besides, kids are tough to keep around all the time. They like to fight with each other and mess with each other all the time. They are great, but put together that closely and you'll be exhausted for years to come. I go with your husband on this one, wait at least another year and it should be easier on both of you.
2006-11-27 16:09:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont trick him, but he wont give birth, you will bring the baby to the world, not him. boys always says things without having the experience. if you feel responsible and ready for another child go on, if he refuses...maybe you should put pressure over the issue. you are the one that will go to the doctor, school...take care of the baby, i know that he wont (as many man). what happens is that men are the ones who want to decide when to have kids, they never count with the womans opinion, and you are the one who is going to raise him, not him, then keep with your plan.
2006-11-27 16:16:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't trick him. Only do it if he wants to. You need to make sure BOTH people in the relationship want the same thing. If not and you trick him, something bad could happen...maybe divorce? My point is.. sit down with him and see what he wants and if he does want another one, how long. Good luck!
2006-11-27 16:08:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a 5 month old and when he was 2 weeks old I said I WANT ANOTHER ONE RIGHT AWAY! hahaha...I told my fiance...he said ok but maybe we will try and wait until my son is 2...which means we have to start trying for baby #2 when my son turns 1 !! hahahaha
2006-11-27 16:08:46 · answer #8 · answered by A Person I am 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Listen to your husband, children require lots of money to raise, and if you can't work and he can't support you, then you will lose husband and be living off welfare. It's a two way street. Children are forever once they are here, when wanted they are the greatest thing, when not they are the quickest route to a divorce.
2006-11-27 16:07:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would probably wait until your husband is on board with your idea. Having another baby is a big commitment and you probably want him to be as excited about it as you.
Give it some time and maybe he will change his mind.
2006-11-27 16:28:35 · answer #10 · answered by TH087 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋