My 16 year old step-daughter is quickly becoming more and more of a handful. She's always been rather conniving, setting her older sister up to yell at her or get her in trouble then play the sweet little victimized angel. Pretty soon it was tellign me to pick her and a friend up at the mall... no problem... until i get there and search for her for three hours only to find out that her frind "didn't feel good" and they walked to my grandmother's appartment a few minutes away. Then there's the lying... she'll look me right in the eye and tell me I promised her something or said something and I know I never did. Recently she was grounded from going anywhere or being online for a month for not coming home from school like she told me she was then not even getting home until 12:30 AM. This time, just this Saturday, she and a friend and her older sister went to this little teen club with a friend of her sister's, She told a 21 year old boy that she was 18 and came home drunk.
2006-11-27 07:48:16 · 13 answers · asked by realpaganwoman13 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I did specify that I am the Step because it's always been clear that I am NOT the mom. The bio mom has nothing to do with the kids. The one in question HAD a cell phone and never had minutes left when she needed them so her dad took it away again. His kids have never had a bed time, never had to eat meals (if you don't like it make something else was their motto), never had to let anyone know where they were, didn't have to do thier homework, no regular chores that had to be done before you could talk on the phone, get online, go to a friend's house...you know? NONE of the standard parent to kid rules. Her Grandmother keeps calling me and telling me how the kid needs all this help I finally told her off that if she was so blasted worried that SHE needed to talk to her son about his kid and maybe chip in for the cost. Talk about a tune change.
2006-11-28 03:21:25 · update #1
Sounds like a typical teenage girl acting out. This is her being a brat. Im sure the more you look around the more common you will see it is. Everything you stated is pretty textbook of it. Mine came home drunk once she got a slide 2nd time she got a court date.
2006-11-27 07:52:27 · answer #1 · answered by George 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
the clue word here is "step daughter"
you really need to let her father handle it...
or you will come out smelling like the
"evil step mother"
and even if you have lived with her forever and ever....
or known here forever and ever... it all is told with that word
"step daughter" it says everything....
I am not saying she is not evil.... or a brat... she sounds like both
but you are not the primary person (or you would have said daughter--even if she was a step) so let it be someone else's problem--but if it were me at the very least... I would not be picking anyone up from anywhere but school.
2006-11-27 07:52:29 · answer #2 · answered by samantha h 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Negative attention is better than no attention at all, isnt it? You ddint say how long she's been your step daughter...it's quite possible she is rebelling because she isnt happy about her family situation...sit her down and talk toher...being 16 generally sucks..you feel like you have no voice and you dont know if your a kid or an adult...go to family counseling ...just dont give up on her, I think she really may be crying out and saying"look at me, pay attention, cant you see I'm not happy?"
2006-11-27 07:55:41 · answer #3 · answered by ~LAX Mom~ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she needs help before you end up being a step-grandparent. when i was that age i acted out in much the same way. i craved individual attention. unfortunately, it didn't matter who was giving me the attention or what kind of attention it was (positive or negative). she needs her parents to deal with this. you should not get directly involved because you might be part of the reason why she is acting out. let her parent be the active person in dealing with this. you need to be your spouse's wingman and support whatever decision they make. granted, you have a say in this but let your say be said behind closed doors to prevent the appearance that you are the driving force behind any action. good luck!
2006-11-27 07:58:15 · answer #4 · answered by octchild23 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she sounds like a teenager
what is her fathers role in her life?
does her biological mother have a place in her life?
she may be actting out
tighten the reins a little .. but make sure your husband is with you backing you up so she isnt getting evil step mother complex...
at 16 she is almost out of control so it will be difficult and frustrating to bring her back in... i think the term is tough love?..lol.. but be sure she knows she IS loved
maybe giving her a cell phone will help keep tabs on her... some have gps so you actually know where she is
2006-11-27 07:54:45 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Rough situation to deal with. Sounds like you have an angry teenager on your hands. Family councelling might be a option. Away for her parents to find out what issues she has. She is heading for disaster on the road she is on. Now is the time to seek help.
2006-11-27 08:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
try looking some friends who're religious and you will start up attending interest's with them and probably even church. i'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ L.D.S. we've a childrens software the place the greater youthful women between 12 and 18 celebration one nighttime a week and have exciting interest's, as quickly as a month the greater youthful women and the greater youthful men of the comparable age celebration for something, and approximately as quickly as a month on a Friday or Saturday nighttime we've a dance with various different church homes of our comparable faith. the clarification i'm telling you this is because of the fact i think of you may desire to get around people who won't choose you and human beings who admire you for who you at the instant are not for what they think of you'll be. confident church standards are to be met like no over reveling outfits, and you're in any respect circumstances chaperoned whether it somewhat is an rather religious uplifting thank you to have exciting and be at liberty of the pressures. i'm particular something like this could assist you to, you in addition to mght have adults who're given the situation of youthful girls advisers with the aid of the leaders interior the church who you may believe and communicate with approximately your problems. i'm hoping you seem into this. i could propose in basic terms calling a community church and asking the Bishop on Sunday approximately their childrens software in case you have not have been given any (Mormon) friends. I guess there are some which you already understand whether you probably did not understand they have been Mormon. ultimate of success and God Bless you.
2016-10-13 05:33:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm telling you that girl is out of control you need to seek for help before something happen to her because she is putting herself in dangerous situation my advised is that she needs help quickly from a psychology
2006-11-27 08:26:38 · answer #8 · answered by user 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs help...All of the things you described are much more than just being a brat.
2006-11-27 07:51:07 · answer #9 · answered by saved_by_grace 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sounds kinda like me and i think im a brat not MENTAL
2006-11-27 10:29:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋