My husband has this friend from another state. I spoke to her once or 2x 8 yrs ago when we were dating. We got married a few yrs after that. anyway, i found this letter he had written her stating that he was loving her and missing her and that he wanted to kiss her all over etc. i was hurt! now last may we get a call (he's at work) from her saying she was searching for him and he was going to her state by coincident. i was drilling him to see if he was telling the truth about her calling after 8 yrs. all of a sudden. he appeared to be telling the truth. but my gut feeling tells me my husband is still inlove with her and snuck to see her while he was in ny for the 2wks. (military duty) are these two meant to be together. when i read the letter he also stated he didnt care that she was married to **** he just kept stressing that he wanted to make love to her. and the letter was so deep and intense it sounds like he really love this woman. I am so hurt what can i do.
2006-11-27 07:04:07 · 4 answers · asked by nomorepblm 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
forget it, this sort of guy doesn't deserve your love, I go conduct special operations for two months and I don't go wanting to make love. two months without my girl, but I keep myself thinking if I did the wrong thing. For your husband, I don't even know why he married you if he loves the other woman. He's just some confused guy. Its better to let go of this marriage, it is better to hurt now than hurting forever.
2006-11-27 17:16:56 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think asking that question is a good way to think about it. The idea that they are destined to be with each other gives him an excuse to do what he's doing, which is totally wrong. Im sure its hard and I dont know if anyone can really tell you what to do since that is such a difficult situation. However, from an objective standpoint, I think most people will have to say that you should end the marriage. And this is coming from someone who is pretty much against divorce. I believe too many people marry too quickly, and then bail just as quickly. However, cheating is just wrong. And the nature of their relationship is particularly unsettling. I might be able to forgive a drunken night of cheating if she was truly sorry and it really was a drunken mistake. But love letters? Even if he didnt cheat yet, its just really bad.
I know youre hurt, and thats why I think its important to start the healing process sooner than later.
2006-11-27 07:28:44 · answer #2 · answered by wizexel22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch! This is really a hard one for you. If he's writing letters to another woman saying he loves her and misses her etc, it seems as though he is being unfaithful to you. Whether he is physically unfaithful doesn't really matter. You don't write letters like that if you don't plan to follow up when and if you can. It truly sounds like your marriage is over.
I hope there are no children involved, because that would be tragic.
2006-11-27 07:15:50 · answer #3 · answered by old lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he in love or just wants to make love?
If he is in love i admire you for even considering they belong together!!!
if he just wants to make love go to the gym.
polgamy is always and interesting concept...
2006-11-27 07:27:36 · answer #4 · answered by wranderer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋