How do I tell my mom?

Question

I am 17 and my mom has told me that becoming pregnant young would be the biggest disappointment of her life. I feel like it is my choice and I will do what I want to do. I have mostly taken care of myself and I am tired of being scared of her. I do not want to leave her in the dark about my pregnancy though. How do you think I should tell her? She has been known to get fiscal... I don’t think telling her in private away from people would be best. Should I bring my fiancé with me or just tell her one on one?

Answer 1

um... try to get rid of the baby. you dont have to tell her. and use protection next time

take care!

Answer 2

Okay, first of all "fiscal" is a money term, and maybe you should be thinking from that angle, too. Do you have any how expensive a child is? If you are lucky and can live with your or his parents, you will still need diapers, food, clothes, not to mention crib and other furniture.
Life as you know it will change. No more parties, no going out and getting trashed on your 21st, no "just hanging out" Having a child is tough for adults, never mind a teenager. Your life is going to change drastically.
Also, there is the small issue of a CHILD to raise for the REST OF YOUR LIFE. This is not "oh, cute little baby" -- this is quit school, no job for a while, maybe a minimum wage job when you can work and put yourself through school if you can in a few years, all the while taking care of a child. Hopefully the father will still be around. Not many people are with the same guy they were with at 17 even five years later even if the relationship doesn't have the strain of a kid.

You are too young to even realize what your mother was talking about when she said it would be the biggest disappointment. If you want to talk to her, be an adult and tell her that you know the hardship you're going to put everyone in your life through, you made a mistake buy your are going to make the best of it. If you are willing to make all the sacrifices necissary, to give this child all your love and listen to those that try to help you it CAN and WILL work. But you need to listen to her wisdom, too. Age = Experience, and you don't have it.

Answer 3

Awww, if you are still living under your mom she deserves the right to know. If she will flip out you may need to tell her in front of someone else along with your fiance'. You must have a plan for you and your child. I hope your fiance' has put a ring on your finger and you are not just saying he is your fiance' just because you have hopes and wishes to marry, It is your choice as long as the only people who will have to be accountable for your circumstances is you and the father. I believe that once your mom knows that you have everything under control as far as finances, housing, job and the rest of the things it takes to raise a child she will be ok. I know she probably had plans for you to do better than she did when she was your age or she doesn't want you to make the same mistakes she made,but your almost grown now and hopefully you will or have completed high school and will be doing greater things with your life to ensure that your child not lack nothing and grow up in a stable, peaceful environment.

Good luck

Answer 4

Well first of all you getting pregnant is not the end of the world, even though your mom will feel like that, I think that you are old enough to take on your own responsibility. Your mom's responsibilities towards you are over in a way, if you think that you are mature enough to begin your sexual cycle and procreate a child of your own and that your boyfriend "fiancee" is going to be there for the baby and you, then go forward on telling her that you are ready for that, it's really hard to get pregnant at the age that you are right now, I should know, but everything is possible and everything will be all right. Just be fair with your mom and understand that she will be furious with you and specially your boyfriend but when she sees the baby once he/she is born it will be very different for her and she'll see things at another prospective. So good luck honey and hope everything comes out good for everybody.

Answer 5

fiscal...? she pulls out money on you in private and keeps balanced transaction records? lol. Physical, baby doll.

I'd tell her with your fiance, in a public place. If she wants to be abusive about it, you can let her know she doesnt need to be part of the pregnancy, or the baby's life.

If she didnt want you to get pregnant early, she should have raised you differently. You're still a child, and she's still responsible for protecting you from things like early motherhood. Or atleast she was until you got pregnant.

BUT that doesnt mean diddly squat. You're perfectly capable of raising a child. Call social services and get emancipated, go ahead and get married, you'll need his insurance and as a married couple with a child you'll get bigger deductions and life will just generally be better. but only if you were seriuosly going to get married anyway.

Your mom is past the point of having control over the situation. She needs to either enjoy this time, or stay out of it.

Answer 6

After all that your mom has done for you, she deserves to be told one on one.

By fiscal, did you mean physical? If you did, then telling her with your fiance present is a better idea.

You say you have mostly taken care of yourself... Just wait. Pregnancy,labor, taking care of a baby, etc are completely different. You will not find time to make yourself food, to shower, to do anything once the baby comes.

Your mom will come around and will more than likely cherish her grandchild once he or she comes.

Answer 7

One on one seems more suitable in this case. I could actually imagine your mom start screaming and probably trying to assault your fiance with her heels or a jackhammer henceforth the best thing would be to do it all on your own.

Of course do not end up getting beaten by her out of rage so maybe you could bring your best friend along just in case things get a little out of hand. I do hope you do become a good mother towards your child. All the best. =)

Answer 8

It is hard to tell your mom that you're pregnant. Even as an adult I have trouble. I think it is good that you are getting married. I would take the ultrasound with you, and take your fiance when you tell her. If she freaks out, let her. It's your decision. She's going to find out eventually. I wouldn't let her reaction upset you. If you're happy about it, that's all that matters. I also would continue on with school and go on to college. I went back to college after my first baby and I'm pg with my second one and have about two years left. Hang in there!! Congratulations

Answer 9

I handed my mother my daughters first ultrasound picture. I think seeing the baby really helped it sink in that the pregnancy was not all about me messing up. There would be a new life to consider and if she wanted any involvement in that life, she should choose her actions wisely.

Answer 10

i am in the same boat but i dont know if i am pregnant or not, i am terrified to tell my mother. she also said that if i get pregnant she would be disappointed but she said she was going to kick me out. i thought about somethings to tell her. you havre to tell her there is nothing you can do, it happen and you are not getting rid of it, but you would like for her to be in the baby's life. its hard for her to take it in but she has to understand that you need her in this situation. dont think of this baby as a mistake because you are going to be happy to be a grandparent although you are upset. :)