Hi, my boyfriend of 7 years' been going on internet dating websites and hav been swapping intimate photos of himself with girls (from locations within the next county)... on his profile he says he's looking for 1-1 encounter and cybersex and says that he won't accommodate but will travel.
I found out 1/2 a year ago and confronted him about it, he promise me that he wouldn't do it again. The other day I found out he has done it again and I spoke to a clairvoyant. She said that he will never leave me, he is just playing but my future is not with him and he will take it further with these girls.
I told him we are finished, he explained that he did stop for a long time.. he feels he can't perform in the bedroom (sex has been practically non existant, he doesn't have the confidence to initiate). He says that the internet is a fantasy and a way for him to feel like a man and that he would never go further. He suggested relationship councelling and gave me his modem. What do I do?
2006-11-26 22:03:59 · 12 answers · asked by mandy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Seven years is a long time to be with someone....you have a lot of history together which will not be easy to leave behind. You need to really examine the relationship as only you know if it is worth saving. If you really love him and things are good otherwise, then I would take him up on his offer and get some counseling. That will also help you decide if he is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. He may also be able to overcome his self esteem issues and be able to better perform in the sexual arena. So try the counseling.....give it another go and if he falls back or you decide it's just not going to work then you can move on....Good luck in whatever you decide
2006-11-26 22:11:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he is honest atleast....
if he doesnt initiate why dont you do it????theres no hard and fast rule as everytime the man should initiate....and in reality also there are many women do initiate sex if her boy friend is paniking....
he may be not initiating coz he may be feeling insecured of his own performance....and he may be scared that you will get dissapointed by that and will leave him....
to my understanding he loves you alot....so dont let a great relationship end due to a small "initiating" problem.....
life may not offer you a second chance....
Good luck anyway.....!!!!
NB:anyway many guys do love and enjoy cyber sex.....but its not imotional for them....dont ever think that guys fall in love with those web girls....no way....if you want more details relating to why men like cyber sex refer to book called "why men dont listen and why women cant read maps"....this book gives a comprehensive study abt the huge differences in the mentality of men and women....
2006-11-26 22:23:29 · answer #2 · answered by banju 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 2 years, why is this arising returned? Did something new ensue or did you by no ability enable it bypass? a brilliant area of a good relationship is believe. Do you believe him now after coming sparkling? If not, that feeling would by no ability bypass way. that may not a competent thank you to stay. solid success.
2016-10-13 04:53:32 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look i suggest u leave him, internet or not infedility is just that infedility becaseu all of it stems from our minds.. an dif he si able to think it then he will be abel toact it at some point. If he was that intrested in the fantacy element of it, then he shoudl have asked you to be on the other end of the webcam/cyber thing....
the act he seeked out other women is probably indicitave of his nature and his failure to appreciate you... like you deserve!
J
2006-11-26 22:10:38 · answer #4 · answered by James A 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't know about u, but for me it would have been devastating if a man told me he doesn't get hot with me, he needs some cyber for sexual satisfaction. u have lots of thinking to do. maybe u can ask him why he can't have sex with u? is he an impotent? or doesn't find u attractive? if those things re not fixable u better off without him - maybe u will find a man who will ignite just looking at u
2006-11-26 22:10:57 · answer #5 · answered by jacky 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off I wouldn't believe what someone else says, but what my instincts tell me. I see a lot of women having trouble with men doing that. That is addicting. I don't know him, but I believe a guy doing that will tell you anything to keep you. Thank God my hubby doesn't even know how to work a computer. Good luck.
2006-11-26 22:08:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think he has emotional problems that he needs help with. Tell him to get counseling with this problem if he doesn't want to get help. Then leave him because you deserve some one who respects your wishes
2006-11-26 22:07:10 · answer #7 · answered by Rocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Will Travel????" That is terrible.
Nonetheless, if he is taking the initiative to make the relationship work, then good for him, you might consider keeping him after all.
2006-11-26 22:07:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
internet is not reality. i can understand where he is coming from you need to ask him why he dont want to have sex with you. maybe you are a control freak. sorry.
2006-11-26 22:08:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hes full of crap! Find someone who you deserve!
2006-11-26 22:07:01 · answer #10 · answered by trevathecleva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋