found pornos under the bed - male things.
2006-11-26 21:23:34 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
for example - Summer - neighbour over the road - short trousers bending over lawnmover - my husband wanking at the window! Normal?
2006-11-26 21:47:39 · update #1
Break up.
2006-11-26 21:25:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It may not be as bad as you fear. A lot of men go through a phase of being turned on by the idea of sex with another guy but are in no way gay. He may well be going through this but still has a very strong attraction to you. Show an interest in the stuff and get it in the open and talk about it. He trusts you doesn't he? Maybe if you are both adventurous you might even think about bringing another man into your relationship as an experiment to see if you both like that type of threesome. You might be on to something really good here so keep an open mind.
2006-11-26 21:33:18 · answer #2 · answered by Yeah yeah yeah 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i think that your biggest worry is whether you said goodbye or not. i am a guy and i love women and i love sex, but there is a time and place for everything, the neighbour, the wanking nah, i don't think that's normal, if the neighbour was doing it for him it would be more natural. don't be too hard on him for the porno stuff under the bed, all men (whether they admit it or not) have or have porn of some type, most women too. ask yourself whether these things are important or not.
2006-11-26 23:42:52 · answer #3 · answered by john w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband is gay and you know it, why are you asking this question? I thought that married life meant you were monogamous with each other, not someone else or even porno or toys he doesn't use on you. You need to get out or pack his sh_t. I know that you just have to either be in shock or you are just tolerating his behavior (unacceptable). Do you want a man or a partner (that's gay).
2006-11-26 22:14:41 · answer #4 · answered by beamer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is a secret bisexual, you better watch out. They are notoriously sneaky and tend to mount complete strangers in public parks, toilets etc.
If he's only fantasising there's no harm in it, that I can see.
Maybe he's just curious though. And it might just be a passing phase. Can't believe he just left it lying about under the bed though? What you should do is say nothing, but be very watchful. It's no big deal, really is it? In this day and age?
2006-11-26 21:28:28 · answer #5 · answered by Not Ecky Boy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For starters, what's really considered "Normal" in this day and age, I suppose it depends on how open minded you are. I would not consider this normal behaviour for a "happily married father of two", however if there are problems in the relationship, maybe he's looking elsewhere to satisfy some fantasies?
Seriously though, I would confront him about it - maybe he really wants you to know, and if it turns out he's actually gay, then wouldn't you rather know and get on with your own life....
Tough one, good luck with it.
2006-11-27 03:44:16 · answer #6 · answered by My_Name 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's perfectly possible for people to have an 'exotic' fantasy life without actually wanting to do those things in real life. Years ago, I had a boyfriend who, while we were having sex, liked me to talk about him wearing my underwear when we went out. He got very, very excited about that, but would have never, ever, ever actually done it.
If everything in your relationship, including your sex life, is going well, then I honestly don't think you have anything to worry about. Though I would suggest you try and talk about it with him. If these kinds of things are allowed to remain 'secretive' they *can* become destructive.
2006-11-27 04:52:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, maybe he isn't gay. Maybe he's bi. Maybe that sort of thing just turns him on even though he considers himself straight.
Most men like porn, some of it pretty weird, but that doesn't mean that they want to do all that stuff.
I say talk to him about it, but without shouting - that'll just make him defensive. Tell him you're worried about it, that you don't know what it means about your relationship. You need to talk, basically.
2006-11-26 21:28:14 · answer #8 · answered by Chris H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to sit down and talk to him. Surely he left those things under the bed where you would find them. You have to ask him.
2006-11-30 20:49:29 · answer #9 · answered by traceylill 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's got a new job working away and got them for you?
Maybe he's given up trying to figure out women and took the easy option? (I would rather be frustrated than bummed, but each to his own I suppose!!)
2006-11-26 21:28:23 · answer #10 · answered by le_coupe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say nothing.
He is obviously still with you. So it is bisexual, not gay, or I'm thinking he would be long-gone. (Not that that negates your concern)
Its not a great situation, but you will have to 'grin and bear it'.
Maybe try to make a little more effort in the bedroom to draw his attention away from all that?
2006-11-26 21:26:52 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋