We've been together off and on for one year, but we've been seperated this last time for about six months. She's dated someone else since then and has recently started talking to me again and we both agree that we're still desperately in love but there's just some issues that can't be resolved right now. I would honestly do anything to show her how much I love her, but something is telling me that regardless of what I do right now, it's just not gonna reach her heart. Any suggestions are appreciated.
2006-11-26 16:46:08 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
This is a very common situation. What I always tell my friends is this:
Love is an energy. It is the connection between you and another person. It is not something that was created, it is something you realised. Therefore it is not something that is going to go away. The connection will always be there. It could become malignant and turn to something more like hate, but there will always be a connection. It's just something you have to live with.
That said there is also the coice of what to do about it. This will not be the only person you have a strong connection to. Just because you have a love connection doesn't mean you should be together.
So I say put the fact that there is love between you aside for a moment. Accept that it will be there, but don't base your decisions on it's exhistance. What are these issues. Are they something that can be overcome? In your post you said that they weren't overcomable at the moment, so your best bet is to try focus on other areas of your life. You can't say if they can be overcome in the future or not. You can't say how your lives will change.
I would also wager a guess that she knows that you love her. I assume you've had enough interactions to show her so by now. If that is not the case, by all means let her know . . . but understand that love doesn't necessarily equal compatability.
2006-11-26 16:54:59 · answer #1 · answered by cedar_lea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You broke up for a reason. Figure out what the reason was. If you cant communicat eenough to get past it or find a way around it, you need t omove on. You can love her still without being with her. You can still be friends and try to do other things. She has tried dating other ppl, when ur ready t odo the same if ur havent already, then take your time and do it. If it was meant to be, you would know it without the up and downs in between. I just broke up with my ex about the same time as u. There may still be feelings beneath the hatred and court cases for custody, but we broke up beacuse we couldnt work things out. She has dated, I have not. It takes time. So many friends and family told me she was bad news from day one and I didnt see it. Love is blind. Try to take off the blinders and talk to your fam or friends to see hwat they think.
2006-11-26 16:52:36 · answer #2 · answered by James C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say just to let it go for now. Move on with your life and say in 2 yrs if you find each other again and you still feel the same the try again then, cause to me it seems like she doesn't really love you , lust for you yes but not love you cause if she did then she wouldn't go out with other people when you guys broke up. To me it just seem like your there for a back up for her.
2006-11-26 16:51:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's time to move on. there are reasons that you keep being an on again, off again couple. if they aren't being resolved now and they keep coming up again then it's obvious that they never will be truly resolved. no matter what, there is always gonna be a place in your heart for her and vice versa, but sometimes you're better off being friends.
2006-11-26 16:58:15 · answer #4 · answered by hoopsgirl808 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal to feel that way you do. My sister has been off on and with this guy for 4 years. You'll know if you two are right for each other. You can't just promise to change things, you actually have to do it. Work through your problems and take things slow. Good luck!
2006-11-26 16:48:37 · answer #5 · answered by tia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would be doing the wrong thing by trying to make yourself feel what you dont want to feel. If its not what you want then let her know but you need to stop sleeping with her. Its messing you and her up in the head in thats what causes problems. Let her down gently and wait till you meet someone who is right for you. Good luck x
2016-05-23 07:48:26 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it more time. If she is really in love with you still, and wants to be with you as well, she will be. She needs this time for herself to see if she wants to be with you or someone else. Just trust that if she loves you, she will come back to you, let HER make that decision and give her that freedom.
2006-11-26 16:49:08 · answer #7 · answered by cathandra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is always a time to let go! After six months it is well past the time to let go kid!
2006-11-26 16:51:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you and your girl can answer this one. Honest open communication is the key. Don't be afraid. If you really love her, confront the issues. Fight! WIN!
2006-11-26 17:12:03 · answer #9 · answered by rtanys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll always have a special place in your heart for her, but yes let go and move on.
2006-11-26 16:48:02 · answer #10 · answered by Carol L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋