At first glance, strangers can't tell that I'm disabled. My disability is not physical. Even after people know that I'm disabled, it is unfathomable how heartless & cruel they can be. "That's not a disability!" or "You must have done something to deserve what happened!" I've heard just about everything you could imagine. I was diagnosed with Major Recurrant Depression and Borderline Personality Disorder. I was molested by a daycare provider for four years. I have been raped twice. Almost raped a third time, I was able to escape the last time. I was married to an alcoholic for fifteen years, he beat every chance he got. I hid what was happening to me, I was so ashamed. One day he put a gun to my head & said he was going to kill me... in front of our two boys... after he told me that he had been having an affair. I took my sons with only the clothes we were wearing & left. We never went back. Three years ago I had a break down after I was fired on Christmas day.
2006-11-26 15:53:43 · 8 answers · asked by Morrigahn 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Take responsibility that they are obstacles that can be overcome - and work on that, for no other reason that you owe it to yourself to get your life in a better place. Quit using a diagnosis to enable hopelessness and helplessness - thats victim mentality. You no longer have to be a Vitim/spectator in your life. Thats not a power that your abusers have anymore, you have the right to take it away from them. That is the first step to showing YOURSELF some respect. You cant expect others to treat you differently that you do...and please take some responsibility for these things, people dont "accidently" get raped or marry alcoholics. until you become responsible for the choices you make, you will continue to be a victim. Ask yourself if you really want that?
And then help to educate people - that these things are a medical condition, like diabetes, only that it affects your thinking/feeling organ, and not the one that produces insulin....but only if you plan on showing people that their sterotypes are wrong....
2006-11-26 16:40:24 · answer #1 · answered by freshbliss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Education. Fortunately there are commercials pushing Depression medications to open up closed minds to the fact that clinical depression is not simple sadness. But Personality Disorders are hardly ever "heard" of. Borderline; doubly so. Being a self advocate is challenging, but the more we are equipped with official information, the more it is likely to sink into the uninformed minds.
Then there are people with another disorder that we currently call closed mindedness. They are unable to understand the reality of differences. It irritates them to no end to see someone with different skin or nose or ears, etc. And that's just the things that they can see with their own eyes. Hidden disabilities are usually regarded with disbelief. It is just more information than they can handle.
You clearly have a gift of persistence. When adversity strikes, you tough it out longer than other people can. You are a good advocate for hidden disabilities. It's hard for an advocate to rein in emotions that can turn them into an adversary. Taking a cool, detached, scientific approach, as you have done here (just the facts), usually grabs the attention of people I'm trying to educate about my family's AD/HD and keeps it from becoming a personal attack on their intelligence. If they are too close minded to acknowledge the facts, then I try to keep a safe distance from them and their harmful disorder (unless they are my own kids, teenagers, bah humbug).
2006-11-26 17:54:24 · answer #2 · answered by J Z 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if you had a tough life. Whether provoked or not like the allegations ppl have made, nobody deserves that. People respect what they know. Prove them wrong. You do not have a disablity but rather a cure. You know the problem that is ailing you now. That is the first step. You have sought after help. Thats the second. Now teach people. Earn that respect not for yourself but for others. Stay busy with your children, forgive those who harmed you and live for today. Day tight compartments. Be thankful for the day you are in and forget the past. Yesterdays got you here. Todays will get you where you want to be.
2006-11-26 16:01:31 · answer #3 · answered by James C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many of us that have diagnosed mental and emotional problems. There is still such a stigma attached to it all, I'm not sure that it's coldness that you are hearing as much as denial, as it can happen to anyone of any age. No one wants to think about it, or know about it. I call it "ostrich syndrome". The only thing that I can tell you is that you are not alone. Be careful who you take into your confidence, that will eliminate some of the thoughtless comments. Stay in your therapy, and take your meds if you've been prescribed any. Try to remember that you will have good days too. And, you were brave to walk out, you did exactly the right thing in taking your children and yourself out of that situation. It took a lot of courage. It takes a strong woman to do that.
2006-11-26 16:09:44 · answer #4 · answered by mightymite1957 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you're helping human beings merely arise with 30 interview variety questions (some complicated yet no longer too no longer common ) requiring them to complex on a reaction after conversing to them for prolonged quantity of time you are able to tell in the event that they are able to comprehending. I labored for the government and that i understand that they've a disability questionnaire in place as far as sitting, status, legally blind, handicaps, etc.... some human beings do no longer show this tips yet after an intensive interview you will understand.
2016-10-04 10:07:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you working today? I am just curious. I know what it is like to suffer a lot of what you have boldly shared with us. Sometimes we live in a loveless society. That's why it is so important to get in touch with a support group. Reaching out and finding friends that have lived through similar nightmares and understand your that you are trying to survive them too.
Trust me, there are plenty of people in wheel chairs that get treated like freaks when they are in public. I have seen it with my own eyes. Some people are just rude and inconsiderate.
I hope that you remember, you are a survivor and you have survived the worst times of your life. So, the hell with other people who don't understand. Focus on the people who do understand and the people that do need your support as well.
Good Luck and Take Care
2006-11-26 16:07:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in horrible pain. depression also. I know. but I try each night to give it all to God in prayer.I have lost everything family, friends, home. am disabled.strength is inside you. your a strong person to have lived thru all this you have. you have your boys, that's great!take each day one at a time. read some positive thinking books.they helped me. I was molested as a six year old.it changes a person. but you have to go with it. life is hard. but what keeps me going is my relationship with the Spirit of God, that's all I have and its enough.I wish I could say something that might help you. I will right now stop and pray for you.I see your so down and out. its all so much to handle. please raise your arms up and praise God and smile.& laugh. and give it ALL to God, and keep on giveing it to God and he will with faith thats in you change all your circomstances, your mind and soul will be cleansed. I see it, I know God is helping you right now. I wish you and your family the very best. keep praiseing God. his blessings or upon you right now, I know it. thank you God.
2006-11-26 16:11:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOw- you are a rather strong person to survive all this
((HUGS))
2006-11-26 16:01:42 · answer #8 · answered by Mopar Muscle Gal 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋