I have a (almost) five year old lil' girl. Her father and I split up when she was three. If it wasn't for her I wouldn't mind if he fell off the face of the earth in any matter concerning me but my girl loves her daddy and I don't have any inclination to deprive her of him. I don't talk badly about him in front of her. I maintain a civilized, polite attitude when all 3 of us are together. I even invited him to go with us to her 1st time at Disneyland on my b-day. He has given me every reason and more to dislike, distrust & lose any respect I ever had for him. There are no custody "bindings" in place, yet. I told him I had a concern about not knowing where he lives (therefore where my daughter lives when she's w/ him) except that it's quite close. If there were some kind of accident I wouldn't know how to get there. He replied it's not an issue. WHAT?!?! Am I the only person (because I am extremely biased on this issue) that thinks this is outrageous?
2006-11-26 14:55:21 · 10 answers · asked by frustration 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You need a formal custody arrangement -- joint physical & legal custody, or sole custody/visitation, what ever you two decide on or have decided for you. When it is made up, you should put in it a clause that requires that you each must keep each other aware of any changes of address. I'd suggest that you also require each other not to move more than a reasonable distance away from the other without that move itself either automatically chanaging the custody situation or requiring it to be reviewed.
Remember this, though: even if you know where the child's father lives, you won't necessarily know where the child is during the time she is with him. He may go on a day trip or other short vacation. If you cannot trust him, you really do need to see an attorney.
2006-11-26 15:07:36 · answer #1 · answered by Leo F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's hiding something.... I'm guessing theres another woman in his life or some situation that he assumes you wouldn't approve of. I sure as hell wouldn't trust someone (biological father or not) with my child without knowing where they live. If he's unwilling to provide accurate and verifiable information then he shouldn't be allowed to see your child alone without supervision. His parents home or yours or a mutual friends place might be an ok place for him to see her but not alone at a place of his choosing. Remember the key words that used you used were dislike, distrust and a lack of respect for this man.You're giving this guy way too much power over you and your daughter...
2006-11-26 15:07:38 · answer #2 · answered by Yahooanswerssux 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes it's outrageous and you have every right to be irate---I'd be furious. Of course you need to know where the moron lives. You have the right to know where he lives if he has your child with him. I think you should contact your lawyer or law enforcement about this because he could kidnap your child if he is such an ****** that he won't even tell you where he lives. Maybe he lives in a van or some other shi*hole. lol. Good luck and stick to your guns.
2006-11-26 15:02:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that the other parent should let you know the address of where your daughter lays her head at night..... you need to check the guidelines in your state but in mine it is the law both partys have to tell the other the address of where they will be with the child for the night
2006-11-26 15:02:05 · answer #4 · answered by Lisa H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is outrageous. You need to go to court and get legal custody and child support. He will have to supply all of his information to the court. Don't let him get away with this behavior.
2006-11-26 15:01:09 · answer #5 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you really do need to know where he lives theres no dought about that! maybe going to court and getting shared custody is not a bad idea that way when it is your turn to take her over there you will know where he lives.Good Luck
2006-11-26 15:02:25 · answer #6 · answered by Dew 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's past time to do the legal paper work.....if he doesn't want you to know where he lives then he has something to hide....you can not allow your child to go anywhere even if it is "close" if you do not know where that "somewhere" is.....protecting her is your #1 duty in life and it should be his as well and keeping a mother from knowing where her child is isn't protection....you have to work as a team....if you can't the courts can make him a team player....
2006-11-26 15:08:18 · answer #7 · answered by blonde_chick_fl_74 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
better go get something in place. you both need to know your childs where abouts. no if ands or buts. you have every right to know that. he is in the wrong.
2006-11-26 15:00:57 · answer #8 · answered by openminded 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes. thats insane. you hae a right to know where your daughter is
2006-11-26 15:01:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
. No address, no visits, This is your daughter's safety.
2006-11-26 15:05:49 · answer #10 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋