Being divorced, the family situation is a mess; different dads, different cities...things that can't be corrected. My kids are not my husbands kids so my need to see my kids, is not his need to see his kids/
Plus women always miss their families quite a bit.
Plus I feel now that my kids have grown up, what is the point of life?
Sorry to be so honest, know there are others out there who may feel the same. What does one do with ones self, when they find themselves away from family, and wondering what is the point?
2006-11-26 13:55:59 · 11 answers · asked by redford 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Look on the bright side no matter how dark it is
2006-11-26 13:57:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The holidays are a cause for depression. Just recognize this for what it is and then you can deal with it better. First, remember that when your kids are raised and gone, it doesn't matter who is divorced. There's another family involved anyway...your child's spouse's family. Most people have to "take turns." When it isn't your turn to share the holiday with them, be sure to telephone and talk to them. Plan a really special day for yourself....a vacation, if you can afford one, to someplace fun. If that's out of the question, then just make a reservation and go out to dinner on that special day....many restaurants are open. Or get a good book at the library and read a good novel on that day. What you do not want to do is mope around the house and feel sorry for yourself. Repeat after me:"It's just a day!" If you are missing your kids, see if you can't plan a time to see them real soon, too. Invite them to visit you and tell them how much you miss them. By the way, the point is...you may be a grandmother one of these days, and grandkids will need you! And, the point is, your kids will always love you, even if they aren't around you. They need you just to be there "in case" they ever need you. Enjoy your new life and husband. God Bless you.
2006-11-26 14:05:27 · answer #2 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be sorry that you are being honest. That's a good thing. I feel the same way re: the holidays and a lot of people do. We remember former holidays when everything seemed better, happier somehow. The point of your life(and I say this from your same situation) is to find your new life. Take up a sport, join a book club, save for a special vacation, indulge yourself w/ a facial or a pedicure. It's your time to have fun finding this new life. It is a tough time. I know I haven't been as happy since my daughter left for college but it's the natural progression of life. Have fun finding your new place.
2006-11-26 14:03:36 · answer #3 · answered by tcbtoday123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a mother, you've always put a lot of time into everyone else, and their needs, and now that they are independent, you are faced with the reality of taking care of your own needs and wants. While this may not necessarily be your case, per se, you are faced with the reality that you have a lot of time to spend on - yourself. Sit down and think about what you would be happiest doing the next thirty, forty, fifty - even sixty - years of your life. What would give you the greatest fulfillment? Writing a book? Becoming a painter? Going on a roadtrip of the U.S.?
Sit down and find what it is you can do with your life that will fulfill it best. The only limit yourself in life is yourself, so even if something sounds so crazy and ridiculous, the only thing stopping you IS you. You only live life once, so now is the time to be alive.
2006-11-26 14:03:22 · answer #4 · answered by vvozgodvv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say so I have to ask, why not go visit your kids or invite them to where you are regardless of their age? If you need to be needed try volunteering at a shelter or toys for tots, some fundraising kind of thing. Get into a group that is designed for people who feel the exact same way you do. Sometimes it is a great relief to know that we are not alone.
2006-11-26 14:00:31 · answer #5 · answered by bellbottombleus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find something else to fulfill you -- perhaps a job, volunteer work, a hobby, a book club, a degree in nursing, exercies -- fill your time and your mind. You will feel better about yourself and life. You might also want to conisder counseling, you may be depressed. Don't be afraid or ashamed to get help. No one is going to take care of you except you.
Good luck to you.
2006-11-26 13:59:11 · answer #6 · answered by I'm Trying 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They find their family so they remember what the point was.
It's easy if your willing to go after what you want. Don't worry what others think. Follow your heart.
2006-11-26 14:02:06 · answer #7 · answered by jbirdj623 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
always keep contact with your family even if they turn away from you. contact can be in the form of phone calls, emails, letters, visits. keep contact with them what matter what.
2006-11-26 13:59:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get involved in volunteer work, around this time is very needed
2006-11-26 13:58:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
find another man to be your husband....go out...do something...and make more friends
2006-11-26 13:59:20 · answer #10 · answered by Carl el fon te 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋