I am married man with a 4 year old son who I love dearly. I have been having an affair with another woman who I love like I never loved before. She is so wonderful and she feels the same towards me. She is in the same situation married with young children. We don’t want to leave our spouses for our kids sake but how long can we continue like this? Any advise??
2006-11-26 11:31:55 · 11 answers · asked by Ya man!! 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
what are you teaching your children by lying to them. Also, if they find out some other way when they are older you may not have them in your life. Trust me my fiances ex-wife cheated on him and that is part of the reason her now 16 year old son hates her.
Ultimately, eventually u will be so unhappy u won't be able to tolerate it no matter what. Also, your wife and her husband deserve to know the truth so that they can move on with their lives and find someone who really wants to bee with them.
2006-11-26 11:43:33 · answer #1 · answered by frenchie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You either have to end it or move on with each other.
You can't keep doing this, the longer this goes on the most chance your spouses will find out and your kids will get hurt in the end. Do you want them to know that you cheated on your wife?
Another thing, if being with that other person makes you happy then be with her. It's better to be happy and have a good relationship with your son then be getting a divorce and battling your spouse to see him and him finding out later what you've done and not what to see you.
Think about what is important to you.
You don't stay in a marriage for children. You will end of hurting them anyway in the end.
Good luck!
2006-11-26 13:43:23 · answer #2 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will be able to continue with the affair until you are caught or one of you decide to break it off.
Are you sure this woman is so wonderful or are you infatuated with some aspect of her that is different from your wife? If you were living with her everyday and trying to blend two families and contending with unhappy ex spouses would she be as attractive to you? Can you afford this change in lifestyle?
Your son is lucky to have a father who loves him. Enjoy this age, it lasts such a short time.
Good luck.
2006-11-26 11:54:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who did you all say your vows too??? Til death do you part??? Or til affair you have, then part??? Stop the affair. Get back to your real life. once you do, you'll be glad. This affair is based on lust, not love. It is a counterfit love that will not survive. it not only hurts you all, but everyone else too...some kids don't recover or understand why you left a spouse for another../???? Grow up, your are not 17 anymore.
2006-11-26 11:44:29 · answer #4 · answered by Ericka E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with all that has been said here. I also think that you and her will have to grow up and accept responsibility and stop behaving like children, or at least, stop being envious of children. Because that is what you are doing. It will take a looooooooong time to get over it and each other (since the sex is apparently soooooo good) but you can get over it, and you will, and furthermore you really should.
If this keeps up, one of you are going to spill the beans and get kicked out of his or her domicile. And guess what the other will do? Between you or her (b/c both of you are cowards) one of you will sit there and sincerely apologize for your "FERTILIZER" and the marraige that you helped ruin, and you will probably sob. But after that, you go back to your own dog house and mow your own lawn, and you will both end up hating each other.
source,
btdt
2006-11-26 11:52:33 · answer #5 · answered by Aurora 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you like that tingle in that thing between your legs more than your son, and so does the skank you are having the affair with. You two deserve each other. In the divorce settlement give half of everything you own to your wife and for every year she has been married to you give her a year of alimony. Set her free she deserves better.
2006-11-26 11:40:33 · answer #6 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't continue like this. Honesty is best for everyone. If you all keeps the kids' best interests above all else, then they will be fine. In the long run you are teaching them a more positive lesson by being honest and dealing with the situation.
2006-11-26 11:35:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It always seems as if the grass is greener on the other side. And it is. But why? I'll tell you why. Fertilizer. What is fertilizer...a bunch of sh**! Bottom line, it isn't always what it seems and everything that is new is wonderful but some how turns out to be blended in with everything else that is ordinary.
2006-11-26 11:40:56 · answer #8 · answered by IrishEyedGal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont continue with it, if u truly had ur childs best interest in mind u wudnt be doing this to his mother! u have to raise ur son to respect women and be a decent human being and say u continue this he will know about it someday and kids learn by example... be a good father figure!
2006-11-26 11:40:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont do it please for your child sake the pain and heart ache you will cause will not be worth it, dont destroy your life. Theres a saying the grass looks greener on the other side. We humans can never be happy with what we got till its gone, It takes a strong person to keep his marriage vows.
2006-11-26 11:43:11 · answer #10 · answered by lola c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋