why do i hert so much , my life is now empty with out her, belive she may be having mid life criss due to be 50 next may, how do i get her back, help me please, thinking of doing something silly ?
2006-11-26 05:21:24 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you know her better than anyone. go get her, but your powerless if she has stopped loving you. :-(. what a sad situation for you, i hope it is all a mid life crisis and hope she comes to her senses and realises how much you miss her! good luck! if you know where she is write her a letter
2006-11-26 05:26:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
She is missing something from her life plan. Perhaps 50 is staring her in the face and she hasn't come to terms with the fact that there are things in life that she will not experience or have.
I have felt that way and I understand her feelings. When I turned 40, I left my marriage of 18 years. There were other reasons, of course, but the primary one was "Is this all there is for me?"
Maybe she has the need for a great romance in her life or to travel the world, to write a book or just to be alone.
You know, perhaps better than anyone else, what her life dreams are. Has she been able to have them? If not, that may be your answer. Perhaps your life together became too complacent and predictable and she needs some excitement. I did and I got what I was looking for. I sometimes miss the old life, but not near enough to go back.
I would advise you to think really hard (as if you haven't been) about what she is really looking for. If there is some way that you can be a part of that dream, perhaps you can get her to come back.
Good Luck and God Bless!
2006-11-26 05:39:15 · answer #2 · answered by Dovie 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is my opinion:
Mate, no one leaving without good reason is worth a tear or depression. I wouldn't have her back because she might go off again, in ten or twenty years.
Admittedly I may be much younger than you, but the principle is the same, I think: If one wants to leave me, they had better be damned sure that they want to go. This bloke is no git waiting round to be played.
I can cook, clean, hang out with mates as well as I can play the role of a tortured, love enslaved soul.
Don't get me wrong, it hurts being left, and maybe I have built up too much scar tissue, but by twenty, I already had the idea that I would love fully, cherish the moment, and following my mum's advice: When it is over, it is over, don't look back, like trains another will run by soon!
Good luck, though, man. I know how it feels.
--Charles "That Cheeky Lad!"
2006-11-26 05:42:44 · answer #3 · answered by Charles-CeeJay_UK_ USA/CheekyLad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry, but don't do anything crazy. It will get easier each day. I can't imagine the heartbreak that you are going through right now, but you can use this time to find you again. Find the things that you enjoy doing. Alot of people take for granted what they had, and didn't realize how good they had it until it is gone, unfortunately when they do realize it it is to late. Do you still talk to her, maybe you can ask her what happened and work from there. But do understand that she just may not want this anymore and you have to find the things that make you happy. Don't allow 1 person to have that much control over whether you are happy or not in your life. Good luck and remember that there are places that you can go and people that you can talk to that can help you through the difficult times.
2006-11-26 05:34:11 · answer #4 · answered by buxomkity 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You must have hurt her badly for her to abruptly end such a long term relationship. Give her time to recover from whatever transpired and then make some follow ups with reconciliation in mind. You should lower your egotism and be really apologetic if you want her back. There should be no winners or losers, infact go where she is with beautiful flowers in hand and a mediator to persuade her to return. It is a shame to see such a relationship go to waste and should you fail to bring her back, you will leave to regret for the rest of your life.
2006-11-26 07:38:01 · answer #5 · answered by marizani 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She must have had her reasons. Leave her alone for a little whle and If you are meant to be together she will come back. If your not meant to be together then it is for the best. There is life after a relationship break up. You may even find that you discover things about yourself , that you wouldnt have had you stayed with your partner
2006-11-26 07:33:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not much to go on there but you need to try to have a conversation with her to understand why she left, if you don't know. Maybe she's been trying to let you know she's not been happy and maybe you didn't hear. If you can have the conversation and let her know how you feel and ask how you (both) can make things work it may help.
Please don't do 'something silly'. I understand you are hurt but things have a way of improving over time. I hope you can achieve what you want.......and wish you the very best of luck.
2006-11-26 05:32:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Are you sure she isn't seeing someone else? First of all, make sure she is not, then things could get much easier as you would only have to find out what in you that made her walk out. Also try to make a mild approach and not smother her if she is not prepared to talk openly about her feelings with you. If she is receptive to your approach, try to understand what she is missing. It could well be sex, the fact that she is taken from granted and does not feel attracted to you anymore. We are close to Xmas, so it is a good chance for you to pamper her. Get her a nice present, something she likes, take her out for a nice meal and try to talk with her as if you both were really in the beginning of a relationship. Show her you care and listen to what she is trying to say. One step at a time and, if you really want her back, you will be able to achieve your goal. Good luck!
2006-11-26 06:03:08 · answer #8 · answered by ladysorrow 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
first off...don't go hurting yourself, it's not the answer....yes it hurts but there must be a reason why she left you...maybe she's bored with the same old life she's had for 30 years and wants a change, it can happen you know, she may want her freedom, she may have found someone else...or she may just want to be free again and start a new life by herself...you must find her and talk to her....there must be a reason...it's obvious that she is not a happy woman, otherwise she would still be there....go find out why she has left...she will have her reasons..but don't do anything silly...OK?
2006-11-26 05:30:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi,im sorry however I know how your wife feels as I feel the same
way about my husband.I have not plucked up the courage to go.
You will learn how to re-build your life,you probably think its easy for me to say especially as I am like your wife.Your wrong I wish I had left years ago only I let my husband talk me into staying & I
have been totally miserable.Good Luck I really do hope things work out for you.
2006-11-30 04:43:30 · answer #10 · answered by Ollie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women don't really go through mid life crisis. I guess it's possible, just not probable. Women leave for reasons! Not just for the hell of it. It's either something you've done wrong over and over and over again, or something someone else did right, over and over and over again. Might be the "silly" thing your thinking about. "Silly" doesn't usually represent maturity. Have you been acting immature? You want her back? You've been with her for 30 years! If you can't figure out what she has wanted and not got, then your doomed for failure. Think long and hard! You are the one who must figure it out.
2006-11-26 05:32:08 · answer #11 · answered by delux_version 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋