Is £4000 a month enough for a family of 5 to live comfortably?

Question

My husband doesn't think so.But this is only from our combined salaries of one of my husband's jobs.He wants me to to find a job where the hours are convenient so we'll spend no money on childcare but bringing in more than £2000 on my half per month as well as be able to do more about the house.He earns an extra £600plus from a hobby

This is my hubby's opinion not mine.I think we are supposed to be comfortable on this.Iam not against making mor money but seems as though its never enough for him

All our household bills and childcare come up to less than 2k.

He alone knows what he does with the extra money.I have tried to ask him where it goes and he gets all nasty and defensive

I think I know why it is not enough.He is practically supporting his sister who is at university and her 2 kids.They stay with his mom who pays her rent

Answer 1

I think everyone here's comments have made it clear as you obviously know yourself, its plenty money to live on very comfortably. I also realise that the reason you have put your question here is because you know you are correct but you need to show your husband how wrong he is by showing him these answers. He sounds like a bully, pressurising you into finding a job that does not exist (if it did, wouldn't they all have been snapped up - £2,000 for part time work as it would have to be part time for no child care - NO SUCH JOB!!) <--- for your husband's benefit. And you have to do more about the house, why? If you are taking care of three children, that is a full time job as any Nanny will confirm.

I'm sorry to say but he is being completely unreasonable, and you know it. Show him all these answers, although I fear that somebody like him will just snort and still say he is right, or give you some punishment for posting the question in the first place and making him face the truth. What kind of a "partner" is he? I'm on benefits, have an overdraft etc but I would SO much rather be like this without a controlling partner, than well off and with one. Tell him to Get Real and if he doesnt, leave him and take 30% of his salary whilst you do NOTHING in his house. ;) Good luck!

Added after your last comment:- you are a partnership. Tell him quite rightly that until you see exact copies of where all his money goes, you will not consider doing anything extra. Ludicrous that he should expect you to.

Answer 2

it depends on your outgoings, or what you and your husband are spending & not communicating to each other about. You need to think of the kids first.spend only what you can afford. Make a list of Incomings & Outgoings, and exercise some restraint while making purchases. it is very easy to lose sight and go 'a bit overboard'. Life is too short. You could also try and do one of the following:
1- Look for a way to get some residual income. (your husband has set the ball rolling already !)
2- look for bit and pieces in the attic/cupboard,etc (everybody has something of value (toys,bric and brac,etc)
3-Open a fixed deposit/ISA /savings account for yourself and your children (a must)
4- £48k (assuming this is net) is more than enough for a family of five to live off. Save a least 10% pre annum and you will see the difference.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

It is more than enough for a very comfortable lifestyle- the average household income in the UK is just under £1200 per month!

Like anything though it is all relative, 4k a month is plenty with a rates plus mortgage or rent commitment of 1k or less per month, kids in state schools and 1 average car to run, but not enough for a huge mortgage, 2 sports cars and boarding school!

You and your husband need to agree the lifestyle you want to have and then work out the funds you need to support it and if it is possible.

Answer 5

As the old saying goes - It's not how much you earn. It's how much you spend.

Look at your outgoings and list them as essential i.e. mortgage, utility bills etc. semi essential i.e. car cost, food shopping and luxury spending meals out, etc

You might think it's odd that I list food as semi essential but although it is needed you could look at what you spend it on. Often a shopping list or buying online is a good idea as then you only buy what you need.

Set a budget based on what you need.

Next look to see if your financial products are the best value. The website Motley Fool is really good www.fool.co.uk

The aim is to make sure that you income is higher than you outgoings and ensure that you can save / invest the remaining

Answer 6

First, I gave almost every answer before mine a THUMBS up!
Now for my tuppence worth:
You may be upset at me, but honestly your husband is a Prat! Your children ought to come before money. In addition, my parents had far less than that, and we did fine. No new cars, I bought the first one in the family, but they paid off a home, I have a Dr. in front of my name, and had no student loans.
I would say hubbie needs to stop trying to have so many things and look at what is really important, your happiness and the children's happiness.
In addition, who said you must make half? He's bloody lucky you work at all. Tell him Dr. Charles James told him so!
--CJ "That Cheeky Lad!"
If he were mine there damned sure would not be a fourth child, not even the chance for him to think about it until.....

Answer 7

This is the modern family way of coping with the current situation in Britain, yes I do think you should help by getting a job, all hands to the helm will give you a chance to pay off all bills and lead a better life style as a family, take some of the load of your husband as being the source of money for everything, besides you will have a chance of paying stamps and pension rights, paying off the mortgage , you will still have time to jointly enjoy the fruits of your earnings and have a little pocket money of your own,

Answer 8

I assume each grandmother would have her own room, and that the parents in law and you and you husband each will share a room, unless you are planning on the grandmothers going into a nursing home or the cemetery before you have kids you should have 2 more bedrooms it will be much cheaper to do this now with a house that big it should be easy to fit in 6 bedrooms

Answer 9

I would say as long as you budget your money you should be able to make what you earn work for you. I know family's that work with less and still have a great life. I guess it just depends on your definition of comfortably.

Answer 10

A 1000 quid a week!..
Yes, more than enough!
And i'm guessing that the reason you stay with your husband, after he's admitted affairs, is that you think it is enough too!
This man is greedy, aswell as not caring enough for his family.
His extra-marital affairs point to the man that he really is.
Money is a great forgiver, isn't it sweetheart?