I just learned that my 12 year old daugther is not my biological daughther. She's the daughther of my wife's old flame. I have been married to myy wife for 11 years. We got married while I was in undergrad and when she moved in with me she was already carrying what I thought was my kid and didn't tell me until 3 months later. Now I learn that I am not the biological father. When the news was revealed, she immediately connected with this man whom she claim to not spoken with in over 14 years. Her initial response was who did I tell.Just recently she reconnected with him and had an affair with him. I have an kid(4 years old) outside of our marriage which I thought we had worked through those issues and I let everything out in the open with my affair. But for her to have deceived me for so many years I can't help but think she trapped me. I was willing to stay after finding out the paternity but for her to continue to have relations and affairs with this man after the fact is unsettling.
2006-11-25 18:53:03 · 10 answers · asked by duped36 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The child is innocent and considers you her ONLY father. Protect her from your wife's foolishness.
2006-11-25 18:54:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Although you DID have an affair, she forgave you and you guys were moving on. She on the other hand not only cheated, but also deceived you by telling you that you were the baby's father. In my opinion that is basis for divorce. If you still want to be with her then let her know she either stops seeing him or its over. If she will not comply, then leave her bc she doesnt really love you. Just make sure that the child does not suffer in the process.
2006-11-25 19:07:42 · answer #2 · answered by jasam4ever08 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG she may have just been afraid to raise a child by herself without the aide of a man....or did she really think the child was yours? Woman do some strange things. However you also had an affair during your marriage...two wrongs don't make it right...there seems to be major problems in the marriage from the beginning, why don't you try therapy, you raised this child from the beginning, you were a family, someone needs to be the adult in this and not think about yourselves, think about the child....What is best for the Child???? YOU ARE THE ONLY FAHER THIS CHILD HAS EVER KNOWN
2006-11-25 19:10:27 · answer #3 · answered by olone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait a minute! She had a kid from another person. You had an outside affair. Dude, it is time to grow up! Were you thinking of retaliation for her having the baby when the facts were known? Seems to me like 2 innocent children may bear the brunt of your lack of trust, and honesty. You two better reconcile and plan a future, or make plans to separate..just don't hurt those kids.
2006-11-25 18:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by demilspencer@yahoo.com 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok let's see if I have this straight...you and your wife moved in together AFTER she got pregnant right?
You've been married 11 years right?
In order for her to figure out she was pregnant BEFORE she moved in with you she would have had to have been at least 8 weeks (two months give or take) pregnant. Then three months AFTER she moves in with you, you find out she's pregnant (by now she's at least 20 weeks, about five months along) and about 20 weeks later (four to five months) she gives birth...Didn't you question her giving birth that EARLY in the pregnancy? I mean from what YOU have stated she told you she was pregnant in her fifth month and IF it were your child it would take at the very LEAST another four months AFTER she gave birth in order for it to be YOUR child...I'm gussing that you were not a WHIZ in math right?
2006-11-25 22:31:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep in contact with the girl but leave ur wife!! she is a liar and a cheater and how do u no that she wont do it again i mean she' s still cheating on u and u imagine if she lied to you about that child being your daughter what else could she of lied about , because thats serious! so dump her. find someone else that is better..i am sure that u will.
2006-11-25 19:00:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
time to seek a divorce you both need help and healing,God help the kids they are the ones that pay the price of you two idiots and i mean that most kindly
2006-11-26 02:51:34 · answer #7 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh dear god what a glorious cluster f*ck! hahaha
you cheated and had a kid outside of your marriage, that's worse than what she did, because you two weren't married at the time.
2006-11-25 18:55:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you better slap your wife
2006-11-25 18:56:51 · answer #9 · answered by wesv6589 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your poor daughter she must be devastated...........
2006-11-25 18:56:19 · answer #10 · answered by justmedrt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋