How can I become more extroverted?

Question

I'm 16 and I've always been very shy. I've loosened up alot since I was 12, but I don't think this is enough. I guess I'd fall under like the "smart-girl" category in what other people see me as, but I want to change this image. I don't want to appear stupid or ditzy or anything, but I do always feel envious of those people who blurt stuff out. I think my shy-ness is even stopping me from getting a boyfriend. What should I do?

Answer 1

Hey! That's just like me a couple of years ago! Really, this past year I've become so much more open. I think it's because I've made some new friends. They are good friends, the kind that you don't have to feel self-concious around and you just have to be yourself, and they'll love you. That's them all right. I've gotten really close with them because I've realized a few things...

1) They don't care what I look like, only what I act like.
2) They care about me when I'm upset and will always be there to make me feel better.
3) They really can relate to what I'm going through, and if they can't, they'll try their best and listen anyway.
4) They do not think I'm too stupid or too smart. They don't care what grades I have, only that I am a good person and always try to do the right thing.

I'll never understand how I really did it, but I just began talking more... saying what was on my mind really. I think it basically started whenever I had a few crisis in my life that I just couldn't get through on my own. I needed them. They knew this and were determined to get me through everything and make it out on the other side in one piece.

I would advise you to just speak up. Say hi to a stranger. If you are in a group/club at school, talk to the people there. You will most likely feel really stupid at first, but you'll realize that people are more open to new friends than you think.

Answer 2

you need to realize that there is no reason to be shy at all. everybody has their insecurities...some people deal with them by becoming introverts...other get drunk a lot, blab their mouths, and become extreme extroverts. Realize that people are very similar and have the same insecurities...there is no reason to be intimidated by anyone...including adults or teachers. It took me until college to realize this. Just be yourself and talk to everyone as if you they were a close friend. You need to open yourself up.

Also, when meeting new people, try "traveling" with a friend or two. You can bounce off each others energy...and feel more secure. Also, don't be afraid to be goofy.

Answer 3

Be patient. High school is, in some ways, a fashion show. As you get older, and more comfortable with yourself, you will be more out-going. College is a transformational time for many. You could add some flair to how you dress, but don't do anything too extreme. Gradual change over time is realistic and attainable. Extreme change over-night could lead you to embarassment.

Answer 4

say hello to people and befriend somebody who is a person who 'blurts stuff out' . my best friend was once introverted and i befreinded her and now, though she's still very shy, is much happier in life now that she can easily talk to others. i encourage her a lot to do things with me, and she wanted to change too, so she does.