I'm going out with a 73-year young man who's been widowed and has 8 adult children, yet he lives in a 4 bedroom house just packed with his past mementos including things his wife used to wear, medicine she took, nic-nacs, and pictures that she left around before she died 5 years ago. I've tried to be patient, but he refuses to part with the things that he no longer need. He has cupboards full of dishes, a large dining room table which usually just he and I eat at, a whole room full of furniture he doesn't use, clothes galore, even food packed away in pantries. I'm at my wits end. Someone please explain his wacky behavior to me.
2006-11-25 11:01:27 · 8 answers · asked by hardlyworkinwoman 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I believe having these mementos from his past comforts him. Maybe he feels that if he gets rid of certain items, he's getting rid of his memories also. I know that I'm very sentimental about some of my things. Help him sort through his things and try to decide what things he can't live without, and what is really just accumulated "stuff". Be patient, he may never let go of many things. If you really care about him, try to understand. If you're just "going out" with him, and not really serious about him, then don't push the issue until your relationship becomes permanent.
2006-11-25 11:09:42 · answer #1 · answered by Starscape 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's not wacky behavior lady, it's all symbols of times and places of HIS life. Who are you to decide what HE owns that needs to be tossed or that "he no longer needs." You are an elder companion for him. You are not his wife, nor have you shared a lifetime with this man. You keep him from being lonely, but you do not have any right to dictate to him what he should keep or give up. How would you feel if he did the same to you? I bet you'd think of things much differently if it was your stuff. Think about whether you can be with this man JUST THE WAY HE IS or if you want someone else.
2006-11-25 19:37:36 · answer #2 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These are memories and possessions he accumulated over the years. To ask him to part with it is some what selfish of you! Holding on to these things he may feel he is holding on to his wife, and a part of his children. How often does he see all 8 children at the same time?
2006-11-25 20:04:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was raised in a time when having a roof over your head and food on the table were considered luxuries. Everything he has he earned, and he has memories attatched to them. Either get used to that fact, or stop dating him, he isn't going to change now.
2006-11-25 19:07:03 · answer #4 · answered by judy_r8 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All these things mean a lot in his life, in fact they constitute a part of his life and he will not part with them. These are things that mean much to him, but they have no significant meaning or value to most of us. There are many people that follow this trend, and we must respect them....KECK
2006-11-25 19:06:45 · answer #5 · answered by Tneciter 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its not wacky. the man just does not want to part with the memories of his wife that he knows that he will lose.
2006-11-25 19:04:25 · answer #6 · answered by Kathy23 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
just cuase he doesn't use it doesn't mean that he doesn't want it.
he wants it cuase it has sentimental value. all those things were part of his past life. he likes to keep it around.
2006-11-25 19:04:07 · answer #7 · answered by sellatieeat 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
omg tell me about it my granparents it looks like a garbage truck threw up all over their house. and they wont get rid of it
2006-11-25 19:04:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋