I am asking cuz most marriages end in divorce theses days..
I am just wondering what has changed over the years? To make this a common thing?? What works to keep it together now?
Yes i have been thru it.. (adiction problem he refused help for it)
2006-11-25 10:37:15 · 33 answers · asked by Jackson 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would like to add i am now a Stay at home mom of 3 kids and remaried.. To a wonderful man.. I get to raise my kids my way.. Love that part..
2006-11-25 11:09:45 · update #1
sorry i sent this to vote but there are so many good ones that i am not too sure what answer is best..cept the ones that mentioned money..
and the person who decided to mention i should of stuck it out with a drug addicted husband.. who refused help.. thanks but i like having a roof over my head and food to eat.. And not having my stuff disapear on me.. I also wanted kids. and his aditction did not start till after we wre married..
Now to the guy who said his wife stuck it out with him.. kudos to her for doing it!!
2006-11-28 07:08:28 · update #2
forgiveness. trust and love are easy early on in any relationship but how many can forgive and forget when the one we love hurts us the most? and then good communication
2006-11-25 12:51:46 · answer #1 · answered by PhantomWiseman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is the most important thing. All the other stuff comes with the love. I think the reason why marriages are not lasting anymore is because of money but that should not get in the way of love. My husband and I will be married for a year on the 3rd and we have had to deal with money problems since before we got married and we made a promise to eachother that we would never let that get us down. I beleive if you are truely in-love with someone you both will do anything to make it work. I am in the middle of my inlaw splitting up and they have been togehter for 23 years now and I just do not understand why they can not work it out if they both say they are still inlove. I know I kinda got of track but I hope I was a lil help. I wish you all the bes tin life and sorry to hear about the adiction problem ( my mom has one of those guys too) Good Luck
2006-11-25 10:47:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My marriage ended for its own reasons (she had 1 too many affairs) and if I get married again, I am going to ensure that the person I marry has similar values.
Examples:
Faithfulness, Honesty, Kindness, Love, No major addictions, Financial Stability, Loves Children, Has good amount of mentors around them (family, friends, church influences) a well balanced group of people. There are more core values that are important, I hope you get the idea.
But also don't forget to have similar small values or things in common, these can be negotiable but there has to be some that are similar. This will help in enjoying life on an every day basis. Laughter, joy, fun, peace, etc.
Examples:
Enjoy similar hobbies, how much time spent with family (his parents & siblings and your family & siblings), how much time is spent with friends, does he like to cook or do you, sports, home body or loves to be out and about, romance, etc.
The gift of life is short, too short to spend in heart ache as you and your children have had to endure. I know this is painful and hearbreaking. The next time I suggest to you what I am working on myself is to find someone whom values issues as I do. It will take some work, rejection from others, rejection of others, but imagine finding someone whom is a match.
I'm not giving up! Be choosy and realize there are decent marriages and I do have hope. :)
2006-11-25 11:32:26 · answer #3 · answered by Cris A 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not want to quote anyone but I think family as in the two together and the fathers mothers etc of each. Today so much time is spent salvaging a livlihood that home is becoming a distant concept. Yea, family has got to be the most imporatant. Ever thought being alone at the end of the world would be appealing? I think not. If I gotta go alone, then give me the needle.
I love life, but then I love everybody....
2006-11-25 10:45:07 · answer #4 · answered by spacekitty12345 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The important things in a marriage haven't changed, society has. I think people are just too quick to think " oh well l don't like him anymore, let's get a divorce " People really need to put more effort into working on their marriage problems and definately communicate more. There definately has to be lots of love, honesty and trust. In my opinion without those things you do not have a marriage. Those three little words always help me " I LOVE YOU " and you must mean it. Hope this helped.
2006-11-25 11:03:08 · answer #5 · answered by kazzadanni 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sad as it is the cause of the divorce rate is the lack of tradition. both men and women should attempt to live much more like there great great grandparents did. or more like Mr and Mrs cleaver on leave it to beaver.
the truth is that marriage is not an equal thing one person has to have to final say and that person is suppose to be the man the husband. the husband is suppose to honor his wife that means that he is to give good degree of consideration of her opinions and idea's
further more women should stay home and not work when they are married if this was done the inflation rate would not be what it is now and jobs would be available for everyman.
i know a lot of people will say there all upset with what i have written but it is the truth like it or not.
as far you go sorry lady but you made a mistake you should not divorce your husband because he is addicted to something
you promised to stay in sickness and in health .
that does not mean you have to remain in the same building as him if he is a danger to you or himself then it would be best if he was in a care facility but if that would not happen you could leave the home but not divorce him instead work hard at helping him to get better from a save place
2006-11-25 10:44:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Most people nowadays are not willing enough to work together on a marriage. They hit a bump in the road and that's it--it is over. It seems to take too much work and too much time to make it work. A marriage requires lots of work on both parts, not just one or the other. It is not peaches and cream--marriage needs life a freshness all the time.
2006-11-25 10:40:37 · answer #7 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A Prenuptial Agreement.
2006-11-25 14:00:38 · answer #8 · answered by capt.jeepman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
taken god out the marriage. I would have to say is love at the top. With god in life of the marriage. being there for each other 100%. even some time looks bad in this world. Talking what you feel inside. Even it feels like hardest thing to do. All so saying I love you. To your parnter.
2006-11-25 14:39:08 · answer #9 · answered by davidslyviper 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I always thought that giving 100% on both parts would seem the solution,
but may never know ,as I don't know if I'll have the opportunity to try for #3.
2006-11-25 10:51:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think both people have to be in the same place at the same time. If one person is into making it work and the other person isn't, it will never work. It doesn't matter how much the couple loves each other.
2006-11-25 10:41:48 · answer #11 · answered by lilnell_12 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋