What should i do about what happened with my parents when they found something of mine?

Question

Umm, well I admit that I swear. I am 13 years old and dont swear often but my dad did his periodic search through my email to make sure their wasnt anything bad and he found a bad email i sent to one of my friends that had the F word in it. I was really mad and dont swear except in emails with friends. Now my dad is going to talk to the childrens pastor at my church and ask him if he still wants me to work with the kids at church because i might be a "bad influence" on them.
Well i LOVE working with the kids and they all love me so i am really sad now.
I know that it isnt right to swear but i never do it except for in emails and my parents had to find that email.
So now i do not know what to do?

they said i have broken their trust and that they cant believe that i may only do it in emails.

Answer 1

Well, if it seems like you're not getting anywhere with your parents, talk to the pastor at your church and explain the whole situation to him. (he'll be more likely to listen to you whole heartily than your parents) If your dad went to the pastor, so should you. You have the rights to talk to him as well. By doing this, you just might prove to him you're mature enough to handle working with the children. Good Luck :-)

Answer 2

Not everyone who works at the church is a perfect person. Your pastor knows this. He values the influence you have on the children and he knows how much you love doing this. He is not going to make you stop volunteering because of this. He may even ask your dad, why, if this happened, would he remove a Good Influence from your life?

Answer 3

I understand that you father is quite within his rights to check you emails however if he is in your mind invading your privacy then change you email to a online sever. This wont stop anyone with a level of computer skill. however is something. The thing with the F word is a bit of an over reaction even for a devout catholic. Try and reason with him and promise to never do it again, work up his trust. Talk with your priest and if you are comfortable your teacher on how to smooth this over. There will be problems u may be banned from internet for a while. If you understand that he sees foul words and ungodly acts you are half way to reconciliation with your father. And above all don’t do it again unless your privacy and internet records are secure and hidden. Again if your father has good computer skills then just don’t use foul words.
Hope it helps
-Wizard-

Answer 4

This is a parent talking. Kids are going to do things around other kids that they don't do in front of adults or younger children. It is a peer thing, and every kid tries to fit in and be "big". Every parent should know that. I would never read my kids' e-mails. I'm trusting.

To punish you and not allow you to work with younger kids is pretty low. That's kind of backwards, the punishment should be to do some church work! Perhaps a talking with the youth pastor would do him some good on how to handle teenagers (are you his first teenager?).

As far as swearing, you and I both know it's bad. It's trashing, and it's demeaning to ones self. Brilliant people know how to control their language and still get their point across with out the use of swear words. Learn to control it now before it becomes a habit that just flies out of your mouth without you even thinking about it. You'll be a much better person.

PS. Let your dad read this.

Answer 5

Well... I would take this with a grain of salt..... count your losses... and move on. If you are truely of good moral charecter... the youth director will probably have no problem with you continuing to work with the children. Especially if this is a one time thing. Secondly.... they might tell you that you can only work with them supervised. This does not sound like a bad idea to me since you are only 13 anyway. Lastly... if they do say they no longer want you to work with the children..... pay attention to the lesson that God is teaching you. There is never a reason to curse. Even when you are livid. Live by the golden rule and dont say anything if you cant say something nice. Only joyful noises should be erupting from our lips. If you feel the urge to say something bad about someone... turn it into something nice....like a prayer.... or gratitude for deliverance for that person.

Answer 6

Your parents sound very nosy to me. Something is wrong with them checking your email. They have control issues. I think that you guys should also talk about him trusting you. If he really trusted you in the first place then he wouldn't have read your emails, and if he wants to talk to you and tell you how he feels then you need to tell him how you feel too. My parents don't but into my privacy and when they do I hate it b/c I NEED my privacy. Like being in my own little world. You need to let them know that they won't be able to monitor you forever because in a few years you are leaving home and they won't be able to monitor you. They need to start preparing themselves to let go.

Answer 7

Everyone swears from time to time, it's not the end of the world. Explain to your dad the situation of when you said a swear word. If he refuses to listen, it's his problem, not yours. You did your part, now he has to do his.

Answer 8

Ask them if they've ever cursed ( which i think everyone has) and if they say no well just tell them you had a bad day and those kind of words just slipped

Answer 9

You are much too young to be cursing, swearing or even thinking those words. Why even do it in an email, doesn't make you cool, mature, or sound intelligent. Totally the opposite. Apologize to your parents, ask them to please give you another chance.

Answer 10

Swears are just like every other word. Theres nothing wrong with swearing as long as you dont do it around little kids.