What is the constant obsession with men and porn?

Question

For what reason do you ask a woman to marry you and spend the rest of there life with you, then all you do is look at porn, then you lie about it. At first I was really into it but since he sneaks around all the time to look at porn its just a total turn off. I give him what he needs in all the ways a woman would. So what is the deal what this porn thing????????????

Answer 1

It's an addiction. Like drugs or drinking. Think of it as a sickness and help him get help.

Answer 2

An obssesion with porn is an addiction. Just like drugs or alcohol. To conquer the addiction one will need will power and possibly counseling. At the least the person must admit the problem, then seek to address it. It is not what you do with him Or what you don't do with him that keeps him watching porn, it is simply the addiction. In some cases it can be solved by the mature man coming to grips with himself. Other times a man needs some type of direction, or maybe this is the kind of thing his friends do and he needs to get rid of those friends. There are many reasons he does it , but it is still an addiction.

Answer 3

Holy high heaven, porn is no big deal. He's sneaking around looking at it because you're so up tight about it. Instead of thinking of his natural desire to see women naked and getting it on as sickness, try watching it with him and then getting it on yourselves. It's not really voyeurism, it doens't mean he doesn't love you, it's not a sickness (though it can be, there are people with sex and porn addictions), it's just men. And women too! I personally enjoy porn, have my favorite porn stars, and my boyfriend thinks its hella hot.

Really, it kind of ties back to the seven deadly sins of dating. The main idea behind mot of the sins is letting yourselves get too at ease with each other. I know it's nice to think that you're everything for him, and really you are, but always having one woman, there all the time...it just drives a person nuts.

Porn is one way to keep the passion up. Tell me, do you sleep naked together or sleep in sweats and a tee? Or do you walk around the house naked? Try curling up on the couch in one of his long sleeved shirts...and nothing else. Or instead of that old rattynighty, find that nice silk camisole you haven't worn since you were dating.

I know it's easy, and a little comforting, to think that you love each other so much it doesn't matter, but it does. By watching other women, its one of his ways of feeling pasionate, and helping your sex life. Stop taking offense to it, and have some fun with it too!

Answer 4

Men are programed to want sex. Spread their seed is their primal urge. Above all else they want to have sex and with anyone that they deem satisfactory to bear their child with. It is nature!

However, the civilization of people requires certain sacrifices in order for habitate together. We are not living in caves and roaming the earth anymore, we live in cities and towns and their are sacrifices everyone needs to make. For men, the biggest sacrifice is to stay with one woman, raise his children and support his one wife for the rest of his life.
The majority of men are willing to make this sacrifice to enjoy the benefits of civilized life. However they still have the urge. Pornography allows them to fulfill this urge without physically breaking the bond of marriage.

On top of all that, every man finds some point where they are not proud of who they are, they expected their life to be different or go a certain way. Sometimes it is a career thing, or maybe it is their sex life. Regardless of what it is, they feel this and think they need something else in their life to be happy. When men feel this sometimes they cheat or they go buy a Porsche or they turn to porn. It gives them a little fantasy that they can't get in real life, even if they do have someone that is willing to try whatever, they may get what they want but they realize that what they wanted really isn't making them happy. So they keep looking for something more....and more...and more. It is the detriment of the male ego. He will never find what he is looking for, and you should know that it is nothing about you that is inadequate. You are doing all you can, but for your husband and a lot of men it is not enough. Someday he will realize that, when I don't know.

Men don't understand the joy and fulfillment of unconditional love and how rewarding it is to focus all your desires and love on one person and putting their needs ahead of theirs.


My fingers are tired!

Answer 5

Look around, our society has created an environment that exploits women as sex objects. The bigger breasted and sleazier you are the more you attract men....This is so crazy, but true!
People aren't concerned about it either, this is why movies ,T.V, and magazines that advertise this junk sells like crazy. Porn type sex has become such an obsession, that both men and women just accept it as the norm. Sexual intimacy falls from relationships, as more and more of this junk enters. The sad thing is so many people justify it by saying it adds spice to their sex life......I say if you need to view others before you can be aroused for your spouse, then there is a HUGE problem.

As I stated to one women about this issue -
Why choose to be ONLY the outlet for your mans excitement
As his wife, we should be the inspiration of it as well!

Answer 6

I reckon just an addiction like food, alcohol, drugs, religion, music, exercise....just a shame that it is not really a constructive addiction. I think most folks can enjoy it in small doses, and men probably are more visual than women, but I define an addiction as something which takes over ones life to the detriment of a whole life. Playing on the
internet is another.

Answer 7

Well this is a really good qns... I think you should the advise of a professional in this....

Anyway, Il tell you my thoughts(since im a guy).. Well, the thing with us guys is that, we basically want what others have... meaning, to us what we have is inferior to what others have...
And in this case i guess it comes down to th situation where by we feel what would the thing that my wife don't do in bed feel like... or another mindset would be that this woman is 10 times hotter than my wife, what would she be like in bed...

Thus these kinda midsets lead to us men taking the pictures of our wives out, and of those pornstars in....

Mostly, i feel because when ppl are not married there is the great sense of sexual "naughtiness" when having sex.... So i guess it also come down to desire for spontaneous

Answer 8

Not all men are obsessed with porn,but it sounds like you husband has a problem or he just likes to watch more than participate. Do you have any idea as to what he watches? That could give you a clue.

Answer 9

porn is wrong, and there are plenty of men who are not constantly obsessed by it...
There are PLENTY of things that women have constant obsession with as well. how about shopping and getting their families in debt to their ear, or food, chocolates, junkfood... I could go on. But try to open your little eyes and realize that there are lots of unhealthy addictions out there and women have them just as much as men do.

Answer 10

sometimes men just feel the need to look at porn. it doesn't mean he's not satisfied with you or that he doesn't love you. it just means that he's in the mood for some voyeurism. he could be into that. if it gets out of hand, go to a couples' counselor.

Answer 11

It's a spirit of perversion. It places unfair expectations on the spouse and is a total contrast to the vow!