Parental Access?

Question

I can see my daughter for three to six hours each wk and Im allowed to speak to her every night yet my wife won't allow me to have my daughter over night, yet Im a good father and my daughter who's nearly four wants to see her dad but my x will only give me this small amount of time with her and payes for a baby sitter when she goes out or her family has my daughter does anyone know how the courts would judge me Im not Voilent nor abuse I want to show to my daughter that I love her yet my wife would stop me from seeing her if I didnt do as she request ? please give me your honest points of view

Answer 1

I concluded the Residency hearings for my children earlier this year.

You are entitled to reasonable access. It is not a sliding scale to suit the resident parent. If you live close enough you could try for joint custody.

If you have taken advantage of all opportunities of access you should certainly go back to court and set out a better plan for seeing your child. Your ex is wrong to use the child as a bargaining tool and is just being spiteful. Find a solicitor specialising in Family Law.


NB Ignore the above if you are a heavy drinker, drug user, habitual liar or of a violent nature.

Answer 2

It's hard to provide a clear answer as i don't know your circumstances and why you split up

- What you need to do it (having a calm and sensitive approach) make contact with your ex and have a discussion about it. Explain that despite your relationship not working out - you want to have a full relationship with your daughter. Put it across that having overnight contact will give you the opportunity for you and your daughter to do different things together - it will help the development of your relationship.

Suggest if it helps that you could come to agreements about routines such as meal times / bed times / discipline so that your daughter has consistency in her life. Draw up a written agreement between the two of you.

Ultimately you don't have to be the best of friends - just maintain a level of respect for one another and have a business like communication. It's important that you and your x don't treat your child as some kind of pawn - being fought over.

If this does not work - suggest mediation - services such as relate may offer this. Also you can set this up via your solicitor.

If this does not work then seek legal advice about getting a contact order which includes overnight contact.

Obviously the courts take contact issues seriously. They will consider the following issues: -

- Ultimately what's in the best interests of your child
- Whether you present any risks - whether you can meet your child's basic physical needs / emotional needs
- If your accommodation is appropriate.
- That you will be consistent in seeing your daughter

If your x contests the application then the courts would allocate a children's guardian who would undertake an independent assessment to ensure any changes / additional contact would be in your child's interests.

Ultimately - what ever contact you have with your daughter - ensure you make the most of it, ensure that it's good quality contact, be consistent don't let her down.

If unfortunately it doesn't work out - your daughter will reach an age where she can voice her own views. Seek legal advice herself.

Obviously this is based on my knowledge from my job - to get accurate / up to date information seek legal advice from your solicitor.

Answer 3

woman who stop dads seeing their kids when they split make my blood boil..wot gives them the rite to stop u seeing your kids,my brother divorced his wife some years back and is not allowed to c his children like you he is not violent abusive etc but hasnt seen his kids for about 4 years, me and my family havent seen them for 5yrs and im their aunty ,we get fobbed off when we try 2 call 2 speak to them so we dont bother now coz the way i c it wen they are in ther teens they are going to ask about there dad and be old enuff 2 make there mind up about getting in touch, under no circumstances should u b blackmailed and it seems she is using your little girl as a tool and that is wrong,there will b a time when your daughter grows up,has her own mind and will come 2 realise that her daddy loves her and may in some respects grow 2 resent her mum 4 keeping u away and she(ur ex)will lose the respect of her daughter and im sorry 2 say but it will b her own fault u reep wot u sow and if shes behaving like a idiot then karma will bite her hard on the bum in time..dont turn bitchy thats wot she wants your the bigger person in all of this so get all the legal advice you can and fight 4 ur child GOOD LUCK XXX

Answer 4

Were you ever wrong?! Ask this question and reply to yourself - in full truthfull conciousness. There are times when we don't see our true image in the mirror - we see what we like to see. If you see yourself as a good father - find out why others don't see you so - and change that! Your X is the mother of your child - she has her best interest at heart as well. Find from her why she think you are not in the best interest your daughter. She probably want the father to be there for the child - but is unsure of the child's best interest! Sorry to say - you probably did not gain the confidence of the Wife - and hence is unable to gain the confidence of a Mother! Don't give up - if it is worth it for you- It's worth it trying n trying n trying...

Answer 5

Get and seek legal advice from a solicitor.You are entitled to see your daughter more often and to have overnight visits.My partner took his ex to court for better access,and although it was a lengthy process it was worth it in the end as his kids love seeing their Dad.

Answer 6

My brother in same situation.Maybe write her a letter to state exactly how you feel and then if that is not successful then go to court i believe as long as you have a full time job and a place in your house for her to sleep they cannot really say no. but if you were not married to her mother when she was born (even if she has your surname) unless you and your ex have signed a parental responsiblity form (for you)you have no rights over her at all because they have only changed the law this year which states if you are on birth certificate you have same rights as mother.you can get this form from citizens advice

Answer 7

You said, "my wife," which indicates you are still married. Get a divorce and have the court order shared custody. Legally, she can't stop you from having your daughter stay with you overnight as long as you do not have other overnight company.

Answer 8

The courts will see that you are a good dad, they should i hope give you more time to spend with your daughter, your x has to prove that you are a bad dad, and if you are not, then there should be no problem, good luck and god bless

Answer 9

Do you have a visitation order? If not, go get yourself one. If you have money, get an attorney. If you don't, you can go to the court clerk and get a document package.

If you want to see more of your daughter without jumping through the hoops that your ex puts up, fight for it. Take her to court.

Answer 10

You could sue her for joint custody- legally you have a right to your child. I don't know what your divorce agreement said about custody but you can change it. If you can get always who'll represent you and you are really putting your child interest first then a judge should warrant joint custody. Good luck.